"Every Woman is a Mother . . . "

Only a few minutes into President Russell M. Nelson's concluding talk in the General Women's Session last General Conference, President Nelson said something that made me do a double take.

Please note that anytime I use the word mother, I am not talking only about women who have given birth or adopted children in this life. I am speaking about all of our Heavenly Parents’ adult daughters. Every woman is a mother by virtue of her eternal divine destiny.

I was not surprised that President Nelson opened his definition of mother to include all women. What surprised me was that he said that "Every woman is a mother by virtue of her eternal divine destiny." I wonder exactly how literally he meant that statement to be taken, what it might mean for the final few stages of the Plan of Salvation, and exactly how he defines "destiny."

We know that, in the Plan of Salvation, it is possible for people to become eternal, heavenly parents, in more ways than one. If a woman has children and is sealed to them, then she and they will be a family unit for all eternity, so long as they all reach the Celestial Kingdom, but not all women have children. A woman who reach the highest level of the Celestial Kingdom together with her husband can have an eternal increase and thus become a mother, even if she wasn't one already, but not all women reach the highest level of the Celestial Kingdom. There may be other ways for women to have the title of mother as part of their "eternal divine destiny," but those are the only two that come to mind. Does President Nelson really mean that every woman will become a mother in either of those ways? Both of those ways require the woman to reach the Celestial Kingdom. Does President Nelson really mean that every woman will qualify for the Celestial Kingdom?

I doubt it. Most women are wonderful people, but even so, the Celestial Kingdom is a fairly high bar. There must have been at least a handful of women in the history of the universe who didn't quite make the cut. If "Every woman is a mother by virtue of her eternal divine destiny," maybe President Nelson takes "destiny" to mean something different than what it means to me. Maybe he's referring to each woman's potential to become a mother.

I don't know. To me, "destiny" has a specific meaning, but if President Nelson is willing to tweak the definition of "mother," perhaps he's willing to tweak the definition of "destiny" too. Or maybe there's something about women's "eternal divine destiny" that qualifies her to be a mother, even if she isn't sealed and doesn't have spirit children.

Or perhaps President Nelson never meant for anyone to take his statement as literally or examine it as closely as I just did.

Still, mother isn't just a noun. It can also be a verb meaning to nurture. If the definition of the noun mother can include "a woman who mothers," then every woman can be a mother, so long as each woman nurtures someone or something in some way at some point. That is an exceptionally broad definition of mother, but it's one way to make sure that every woman can fit under it. I don't think that's what President Nelson meant, but I'm not sure he did mean.

It's hard to imagine every woman literally becoming a mother, but maybe they will, or maybe the statement wasn't meant to be taken literally. Maybe all women are or will be mothers, or maybe at least some won't. It's hard for me to tell. For now, I'll take President Nelson's word for it, whatever he meant his words to mean.

How We Cope with Mortality

About halfway through his talk, President Dallin H. Oaks spoke of one of the unique qualities of LDS youth:

Your uniqueness was recognized in a University of North Carolina study of American teens and religion. A Charlotte Observer article had the title “Mormon teens cope best: Study finds they top peers at handling adolescence.” This article concluded that “Mormons fared best at avoiding risky behaviors, doing well in school and having a positive attitude about the future.” One of the researchers in the study, who interviewed most of our youth, said, “Across almost every category we looked at, there was a clear pattern: Mormons were first.”

President Oaks went on to explain the reason why members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints cope so well with mortality: We know the Plan of Salvation. We cope well with mortality because we know it's temporary and because we know what comes next. We know about the eternal blessings that come to those who "endure to the end," and we know about the great regret suffered by those who give in to temptation. We know that this Earth life is a very small blip of time in the perspective of eternity. We know that the many pains of life and the highs people seek to dull the pain are all temporary, and we know what will truly last forever.

Life is tough, and we feel that as strongly as anybody, but when life gets tough, we can take comfort in knowing that these afflictions have a purpose and that they won't ail us forever. This is a blessing I hadn't considered before, but it's a blessing I'm glad I have. I realize that I have been blessed by my knowledge of the Plan of Salvation and what is temporal or eternal. The hardships we suffer in life won't last forever, but the blessings we'll get for enduring well will.

Balance and Moderation

I am continually learning the importance of moderation. Many things are good, in proper quantities, but too much of anything can become bad. The trick is to regularly make adjustments, constantly seeking a proper balance. Work, rest, and recreation are all parts of a complete life, but they must be kept in proper balance. Keeping these aspects of life in balance can be tricky, but it may be essential to a fulfilling life. Spending too much time on any one thing can lead to serious regret, so it's important that we keep track of how we spend our time and that we budget our time in balance and moderation.

"An Innate and Great Capacity"

On the evening after the historic announcement that church is now switching to two hours instead of three, with the third hour's meetings to be conducted at home, President Henry B. Eyring spoke about Gospel Learning in the Home, and since his audience was composed entirely or nearly entirely of women, he focused particularly on them.

He spoke of women's "innate and great capacity to sense the needs of others and to love." This capacity helps them care for others and makes them natural nurturers. In a way, I'm somewhat jealous of this trait. Empathy is always a good trait to have, and Elder Eyring said that this empathy also "makes you [women] more susceptible to the whisperings of the Spirit."

I know that not all women feel like they have "an innate and great capacity . . . to love . . . [t]hat . . . makes [them] more susceptible to the whisperings of the Spirit," but I believe that all women do, not only because the nurturing of mothers is a natural advantage to all species blessed by it, but also because these quotes were given by a prophet of God. To quote him directly, Elder Eyring said, "As daughters of God, you have an innate and great capacity to sense the needs of others and to love. That, in turn, makes you more susceptible to the whisperings of the Spirit." If you are a "daughter of God," as all women are, Elder Eyring is talking to and about you.

I am grateful that the church is leaning more toward Gospel Learning in the Home largely because of how much of a blessing it will be for families to learn the Gospel from the women in their lives. It is good that families support each other in Gospel learning, and especially when much of the teaching and guiding is done by those who have a natural talent for doing so.

Competitive Games

I played a lot of games with a friend and his family today, but as I did so, I noticed a troubling trend with almost all games: they're competitive. There are winners. Players actively try to win the games, sometimes by actively trying to make the others lose. If I recall correctly, all of the players in each of the games I played today played cards that directly, negatively affected other players. I liked some of those games in spite of this, but this is one of the main reasons I generally prefer D&D.

Dungeons and Dragons is a cooperative game. In D&D, players work together to achieve a common goal. In D&D, everyone can win. D&D has its drawbacks, but forcing players to work against each other is not usually one of them.

I am not a competitive person. I don't much care for winning at the expense of others losing. I would rather work with other people than against them. That's one of the many reasons I like D&D. I like that D&D lets people have fun together without pitting them against each other. I know that competitive games can be important because they teach people (abstractly) how to succeed in life, but cooperative games can also be important for the exact same reason. Life doesn't always have to be competitive, and I'm glad that games don't always have to be competitive either.

Great Gifts at Great Costs

On Christmas, I got a gift about which I feel about the same way that I feel about the Atonement. Both were great gifts that came from great people at great costs, and I ultimately don't know how I should feel about that.
I know how those great people want me to feel about it. They want me to be grateful. They want me to appreciate and enjoy the gift without any reservations, and, to honor their wishes and sacrifices, I'll certainly try, but I can hardly help thinking about how much sacrifice went into these gifts.

People I love went through great pain to give me those gifts, and the compassionate side of me wishes they hadn't. I don't want either of those people (or anyone else) to have had to have suffered for me.

But there's no point in wishing that now. It's water under the bridge. The pill has been swallowed. The bitter cup has been drunk. The costs of these gifts were great, but those costs have been paid. The question now is what I am going to do with these costly gifts.

Of course, I am going to use them, and I am going to love these gifts and those who gave them to me. And if I think about the sacrifices that went into producing those gifts, I will try to focus on the love that motivated those sacrifices instead of the pain those sacrifices caused them.

I can't sing I Stand All Amazed with all my heart because it isn't "wonderful to me" that Jesus paid such a great price to pay for my sin. It isn't wonderful that Jesus died for me or that He had to die for me. But that isn't what the hymn says! The hymn says "Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me enough to die for me!" (emphasis added). Christ's sacrifice wasn't "wonderful"; His motivation was.

So, that's the part I'll focus on when I think of these gifts. On their own, these gifts are wonderful. I love them, and I'm grateful for them. I'll use them with great appreciation. Naturally, I wish these gifts hadn't cost my loved ones so much, but the love that went into the sacrifices that produced these gifts is what makes these gifts so special, so that's the part I'll focus on. For my own sake, I'll try not to think about the great sacrifices that went into them. Instead, I'll focus on what great gifts they are and the great love that went into making them.

Gathering Light During Seasons of Light

My family spent most of the day playing a game called Photosynthesis.  In this game, players place trees on a board, which collect energy each round. Players can use this energy to make their trees grow and plant more trees, which then gives them more energy. However, this game has a trick to it: The sun changes its position each round, and the trees create shadows which block the light from other trees. Depending on how players place and grow their trees, they could end up gathering lots of light on some turns and very little light on others. This energy is incredibly important because players need energy to grow their trees, collect more energy, and ultimately earn points and win the game. In the game of Photosynthesis, as with spiritual matters, it is essential to gather an abundance of light, especially when that light is plentiful, so we'll have enough light to get us through the seasons when the light is less abundant.

We have just experienced a season of light. Christmastime is a special time for Christians of all denominations, and many non-Christians celebrate religious holidays this time of year as well. Even those with other beliefs or no beliefs often get caught up in the spirit of the season and share in appreciating and sharing the light. By all accounts, even if we're only talking about the decorations, Christmastime is a season of light.

However, that season is winding down now. Soon, the gifts will all get put away and the lights will be taken down, and the world will go back to normal, which is far less light than it is at Christmastime. When that time comes, it will be our responsibility to ourselves and those around us to hold on to as much of that Christmastime light as possible. Light is abundant now. We should gather up as much of it as we can and hold on to it for when we or someone near us really needs it.

I know this message is arriving too late to be applied, but thankfully, Christmastime isn't the only time we can gather light. We can also gather light on Easter, at each General Conference, whenever we visit the temple, and, to a lesser extent, each time we take the Sacrament. Every time we feel The Spirit, we have an opportunity to draw on some of His light. So, we don't really need to worry about where our next round of light is going to come from.

However, we also shouldn't underestimate how much light we're going to need. The world is darkening, and it's going to take more and more light to hold the darkness at bay, let alone drive it back. That's why we need to make the most of times like this, when we can gather the spiritual light we know we're going to need later. It may already be too late for this season, but there's still some lingering light in our fresh memories of the last few days. We should try to hold on to that light until our next opportunity to gather light in abundance.

Christmas Joy

Today, I celebrated Christmas with my family. We got together, exchanged and unwrapped gifts, ate together, and played games. It was a wonderful day. Today felt like Christmas, and that taught me something about what makes Christmas feel like Christmas to me.

The most obviously Christmassy thing we did today was exchange gifts. We didn't sing carols or look at lights, and we didn't spend much time talking or thinking about Jesus, but I think we had a portion of Christ's spirit with us anyway, because of the joy we felt. We enjoyed giving each other gifts. We enjoyed making each other happy. We enjoyed spreading joy between us.

Naturally, Christmas is mostly about the birth of Jesus Christ, but I think that the main purpose of Christmas is to experience and spread joy.  Even focusing on Christ and His birth leads us to  experience feelings of joy. I think that joy is such a central part of Christmas that Christmas wouldn't feel like Christmas without it.

Sing All Ye Citzens of Heav'n Above

This morning, I sang several songs with the other members of my ward's choir. For the last of our songs, O Come All Ye Faithful, we invited the congregation to join us in singing the second and third verses. Of these, the second verse was particularly fitting:

Sing, choirs of angels,

Sing in exultation;

Sing, all ye citizens of heav’n above!

I enjoyed having all members of the congregation join us in singing those words. I believe that we were all members of the "choirs of angels" who sang at Christ's birth. We were all pre-mortal "citizens of heav’n" then, we all knew who Christ was, and we would all have been excited about Christ's birth. Plus, we would all have been angels at that point, giving us, by definition, angelic voices, so we would have had no excuses not to sing.

Singing and praising God aren't just for a handful of people. Everyone is welcome to join the choir. And for that choir performance in particular, I imagine that we all did join in.

(How) Should I Decide Krusk's Fate?

I've been thinking about putting the fate of a marriage in the hands of a single die roll.

I am currently playing D&D as a pirate called Krusk Bloodfist. Before he was a pirate, Krusk was a regular sailor named Greg Davidson with a wife named Holly. (Any similarities to any real couples are purely coincidental. I just stole the names because they'd be easy to remember.) Greg's last interaction with Holly was him catching her in bed with another man. Assuming she was being raped, Greg pulled the man off of Holly and beat him to death. After this traumatizing event, Holly shut herself in their home, and Greg decided to give her some space and get himself a drink. The drink was drugged, Greg was shanghaied, and the two haven't been able to communicate with each other since.

Now, about two months later, Krusk Bloodfist is the captain of a pirate ship on a heading for the Port of Peril, the town in which his wife lives. Very soon, Krusk/Greg is going to have the conversation I've been thinking about for over half a year.

And it looks like I'm going to have to decide how that conversation goes.

Normally, the outcome would be up to a combination of me, the DM, and the dice. Krusk Bloodfist is my character. I decide what he does, or at least what he tries to do. Holly Davidson is not my character. I may have created her, but that doesn't mean I control her. In game terms, she is a Non-Player-Character or NPC (as opposed to Krusk, who is a Player Character or PC). The DM (Dungeon Master) controls the NPCs. However, this particular DM doesn't seem too strongly invested in my character's backstory. I don't think he'll be making any decisions for or about Holly, so both sides of this fateful conversation fall to me. I can decide what each person says, how each person feels, and how they decide to act.

I am having a hard time making those decisions.

I intentionally left a lot of questions unanswered about this situation, especially as they relate to Holly. I intended to let the DM make those decisions (whether Holly was raped or unfaithful and how she feels about all of this, especially after two months of unexplained absence), but it looks like I'll have to make those decisions after all, and I'm not sure which decisions to make.

One idea I had was to let the dice decide. I could easily roll dice to decide whether Holly was raped or not, whether she wants to stay married to Krusk, etc., but that seemed like a lot of die-rolling. A faster and simpler method is to roll a 20-sided die to decide, on a scale of 1 to 20, how well this conversation goes for Krusk. I'm tempted to use this method, when the time comes. This way, I could learn the fate of Krusk's relationship when he does, maintaining the anticipation as long as possible. It would also be quick, so I wouldn't have to take up too much game time resolving something about my character's backstory. It's not really relevant to the other players, so I don't want to waste too much of their time.

In preparation for the most important die roll of Krusk's life, I created a sort of chart that describes what each result would mean. I started with what the best and worst case scenarios would look like, then decided what the middle-most result would be, and filled in another few possibilities from there. As I wrote about these potential outcomes, I felt that some of these outcomes are more desirable for me than others. The best and worst case scenarios are dramatic, and the middle-most outcome is tragic, which makes it interesting for me, but the other outcomes I've written are kind of "meh." I might revise them. Or I might choose which potential outcome I like best and not roll the die at all.

It would be easy to let the die decide, on a scale from 1 to 20, how well things go for Krusk when he goes to talk to his wife. Or I could just decide how well things go, basing my decision on what would be the best or most interesting outcome. I could roll the die, and then reroll it if I don't like the result. But that's cheating. I should either decide or let the die decide. Either I'll leave it completely up to fate, or I'll take fate into my own hands.

Either choice has its pros and cons. If I choose Krusk's fate, that's somewhat anti-climactic. If I let the die choose, I run the risk of getting a result I don't like. One could argue that I should roll the die because we can't control fate. Krusk took his chances, and so should I. But one could also argue that we can influence fate, and when we can, we should. It would probably be morally good for me to choose what I think would be the best outcome for this D&D group and the story we're making together. It's a decision of very small importance, but if it could influence the happiness of others, I should at least consider it.

Krusk's fate has not yet been decided. I haven't even decided how his fate will be decided. Maybe I should flip a coin. No, I need to decide. I need to at least decide if and how I will decide Krusk's fate.

The Zeal of the Legion

One thing I failed to consider when I discussed the advantages of the Azorius Senate over the Boros Legion is the extent of their motivation. From what I can tell, the Azorius obey and enforce the law mostly because it's the law. Some of them write and enforce laws that they hope will make Ravnica a better place, but many of them enforce the law largely because it's their job. The Boros, on the other hand, seem more passionate about it. Many of them are actively trying to do good, and few of them are "just doing their job." I think that's part of what I've been missing lately: Passion, Activity, Zeal. In addition to Azorius discipline, I could use a good deal of Boros zeal to help me stay motivated. It's been said that all evil needs to succeed is for good men to do nothing. The Boros don't fall for that. The Boros are anxiously engaged in their work. I should be more like that. As long as Satan is trying to make me lethargic, I would do well to fight back with zeal.

"Many Hours"

Tonight, in our family scripture reading, my family read 1 Nephi chapter 8, in which Lehi describes his dream of the tree of life, and one part toward the beginning stood out to me.

At the start of the the dream, Lehi found himself in "a dark and dreary wilderness." Not a great start. Soon, an angel appeared and led Lehi through "a dark and dreary waste." So, even following an angel, Lehi's situation doesn't seem to be getting a whole lot better, and in fact, may even be getting worse. And evidently, this walking goes on for quite some time because Lehi said "And after I had traveled for the space of many hours in darkness, I began to pray unto the Lord that he would have mercy on me, according to the multitude of his tender mercies." Personally, I would like to think that, if I found myself in "a dark and dreary waste," it wouldn't take me "many hours" to start praying. But I'd bet it would.

This world is not the nicest place we could be living in. This planet has a lot of problems, both natural and man-made. Earth is (at least sometimes) a "dark and dreary" place. Whether it's a "wilderness" or a "waste" or a "field" ripe with potential may be a matter of perspective, but it clearly isn't its best self right now. Going through life is a struggle that brings even the strongest people to their knees.

Yet, even some of the wisest people are reluctant to go to their knees in response to facing the challenges of earth life. It took Lehi, a prophet, "many hours" traveling through "a dark and dreary waste" to realize that maybe he ought to pray about his situation.

I find it easy to relate to that. I often go for long stretches of time, longer than "many hours," between meaningful prayers, despite facing personal challenges that really test me. "A Dark and Dreary Waste" could be the title of my biography if I don't make some drastic changes. I acknowledge that my life isn't anywhere near as dark or as dreary as many other people's lives, but it's still dark and dreary enough to make it obvious to me that I should pray regularly. Yet, I don't. And I imagine that others don't either. We need God's help, but it takes us so long to admit that and ask for it.

To Lehi's credit, he did have an angel guiding him, which might have led him to believe that further aid was unnecessary. We fall into that trap, too. We have prophets and scriptures to guide us, and many of us have loving family members to aid and guide us as well. However, regardless of whatever mortal or even celestial support structures we may have, we still need to pray. Nothing can replace frequent, meaningful communion directly with God.

We need to pray. And it's best that we not wait "many hours" before doing so.

The Reward Expectation Paradox

Sister Cristina B. Franco spoke of The Joy of Unselfish Service, but even just the title gives me some concern. I'm not sure it's possible for a Christian to truly be selfless.

When one has a knowledge of the Gospel and the blessings that come from being righteous, doesn't that knowledge play into one's decision-making, at least subconsciously? When we do something nice for someone, even though we know that there's nothing in it for us, don't we know, somewhere in the backs of our minds, that there actually is something in it for us? We know God rewards righteousness. We know that, if we do good unselfishly, we can expect a reward. But if we actually expect that reward, we're less likely to get it.

It's tricky. If a person is unselfish, they can expect a reward, but if they actually expect the reward, they're not really being unselfish, so the reward for unselfishness won't come. But, if a person who only does good for the reward realizes that they're not going to get the reward but does good anyway, they actually will get the reward. This whole situation creates some weird reward expectation paradox. You receive the opposite of what you expect, and if you change what you expect, you change what you'll receive as well.

I suppose the real trick, as will all paradoxes, is to not think about it. If you don't think about the blessings, the existence of those blessings won't factor into your motivations, at least not consciously, so you're more likely to get the blessings you're deliberately not thinking about.

Almost

A little over a week ago (or longer, I don't remember), a sister in my ward gave a talk that included a very interesting point that centers around the word "almost." She said that if we almost keep the commandments, then we almost get the blessings that come from keeping the commandments. Clearly, the message was that we should keep the commandments if we want to get the blessings, but this teaching led me to wonder, can we move the "almost" and have the sentence still be true? If we keep almost all the commandments, will we get almost all the blessings God offers us?

Theoretically, perhaps. Each blessing is predicated on a commandment. If we keep a commandment, with get the blessing that goes with that commandment. Theoretically, the more commandments we keep, the more blessings we get. Yet "more" doesn't always add up to "almost all" or even "most."

God offers us a lot of blessings, and many of them are locked behind stricter requirements than just "keep this one specific commandment." Some of God's best blessings, like living in the Celestial Kingdom, require a pattern of obedience to many of God's commandments and a commitment to try to keep them all. And what is arguably the greatest of all the gifts of God, eternal life, is locked behind the requirement of perfection.

In fact, that might be enough to prove the argument right there. It's unclear how to quantify blessings, but I doubt we'd count omnipotence as just one blessing, like a single talent. Omnipotence could almost be counted as infinite talents, and thus be counted as infinite blessings, meaning that "almost all" of God's commandments require incredibly high standards, not just keeping some or most or even "almost all" of the commandments. If we want to get all the blessings that come from obedience, or even most of those blessings, we are going to have to (at least make a diligent effort to) keep all the commandments.

The bottom line is that "almost" isn't good enough. Whether we're almost keeping the commandments or whether we're keeping almost all of them, neither way will qualify us for almost all of God's blessings. Exact obedience is difficult, and repentance will be required, but it is the blessing we should all strive for. Almost all of God's blessings depend on it.

Act Like It's Christmastime

Today was the last day of tutoring. It was also the day I returned the textbook I rented, turned in my last writing assignment, and signed up for next semester's classes. For me, this semester is basically over. This means that I can finally relax for a little while and focus on more important things, like family and Christmas. So far this season, I've been less interested in Christmas than I'd like to be, but now that school is over, I intend to change that. I plan to put up lights, wrap presents, sing carols, and generally participate more in the seasonal celebrations. It's going to be a good Christmas season. I'm starting a little late this year, but, starting tomorrow, I'm going to act like it's Christmastime.

Boros vs Azorius

I'm going to cut to the chase with this blog post. While I feel that I am best represented by the Boros Legion, I acknowledge that I would be better off as a member of the Azorius Senate.

The Boros are basically the military of Ravnica. They deal with massive threats, like riots, rampaging monsters, and open attacks by the guilds who want to bring about the end of the world as we know it.

Meanwhile, the Azorius are more like Ravnica's law-makers and police. As law-makers, the Azorius set the rules, and as the police, the Azorius respond when those rules are broken.

In terms of their goals, the Boros and Azorius are similar. They both want to maintain order and stability within Ravnican society by working against those who would undermine that society and/or tear it down. However, their methods are worlds apart.

Usually, the Boros answer violence with violence, believing that the best defense society has going for it is a good counter-offense. In theory, this method could work. If the Boros managed to eliminate the Rakdos cultists (and the raiding Gruul Clans, and the infectious Golgari Swarm, and the subversive House Dimir, and the monster-making Simic Combine and Izzet League), peace in Ravnica could easily be maintained in the absence of those who would disturb that peace. However, there are many huge problems with this idea.

For starters, it is literally impossible for the Boros to win this way. The magical Guildpact that binds all the guilds of Ranvica prevent any of them from utterly destroying any other. Even if the Boros could destroy one of those guilds, even their vast military power would be insufficient to destroy them all. Despite the Boros's best efforts, there would always be those who threaten society. And tying in vain to destroy those who sow conflict merely creates more conflict. The violence of the Boros is a necessary tool to use in response to massive, immediate threats to Ravnica, but it will not, by itself, solve the problem of violence in Ravnica.

But the Azorius just might. Some members of the Azorius Senate (mainly its arresters and enforcers) are capable of engaging in a fight, when a fight is unavoidable, but the Azorius would rather avoid those fights with preventative measures and resolve them as nonviolently as possible with defensive measures that subdue their opponents instead of offensive measures that destroy their opponents.

The Boros fight fire with fire. The Azorius dowse the fires and make efforts to stop people from starting fires in the first place.

Ultimately, I think that the Azorius are more effective at fighting evil than the Boros are. The Azorius have their shortcomings, but their disciplined, defensive approach to evil is, in many ways, far superior to the Boros's combative response to evil.

Relating these fictional guilds' strategies to my real-life battle against evil, the Azorius have a lot to offer me. Their strict adherence to (divine) rules can inspire me to greater diligence, which is normally a weak point for me. The Azorius also have a stronger emphasis on detection and prevention than the Boros, and though the Boros often manage a swifter response than the Azorius, the Azorius' response may be more effective. I would do well to alter my sin-combating strategies to incorporate more Azorius methods. I may still prefer Boros to Azorius decks when it comes to playing the card game, but when it comes to all-too-real spiritual conflicts, I would rather be Azorius than Boros.

The Greatest of All the Gifts

Yesterday, I said that the Atonement of Jesus Christ was the greatest gift of all time, at least in terms of how much love went into the gift and how much joy comes from it. However, I knew even then that there was one strong contender for the title of the greatest gift ever, and it has some scriptural authority to back up its claim:

And, if you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God. - D&C 14:7

That seems pretty conclusive, so what is it that makes eternal life a greater gift that the Atonement of Jesus Christ? If we're going by our previous metrics, we must compare the love that went into those gifts and the joy we get out of them. And, since both of the givers were motivated by an equal, infinite amount of love, there's really only one metric we need to measure: joy. Does eternal life give us more joy than Christ's Atonement? I would say yes for at least two reasons.

First, we shouldn't forget the sacrifice factor. one factor that detracts from the joy I receive through the Atonement of Jesus Christ is remembering how much Jesus Christ had to sacrifice to make it happen. Second, eternal life seems more positive than Christ's Atonement. The Atonement of Jesus Christ negates negatives more than it adds positives.

On the other hand, there are reasons why this comparison might not be necessary. For starters, my metrics could be entirely wrong. Also, while eternal life is the greatest of all the gifts of God, the Atonement was brought to us by Jesus Christ; perhaps they are each the greatest gifts of their respective givers, and neither gift is known to be greater than the other.

Ultimately, I think the question is mostly moot because the gift of eternal life presupposes the gift of Christ's Atonement. When one receives eternal life, it is only through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. One could argue that receiving eternal life includes receiving Christ's Atonement, which would make eternal life definitively greater.

Yet, of course, none of this really matters. It's not a contest. It doesn't matter which gift is greater by which standards. Both gifts are excellent and essential, and we should all seek both, no matter which gift is "greater."

What Makes a Good Gift?

It's not the monetary cost or value of the gift, as many Christmas stories attest. Good gifts don't have to be expensive.

They don't even have to come at a great personal cost. Gifts of service may be appreciated more if the service was a great sacrifice, but a caring recipient might be turned off by the fact that the giver sacrificed so much.

I would argue that not even love is a good indicator of a good gift, depending on our definition of a "good gift." A gift may be the product of a great deal of love and still not be well-received, whereas another gift might be greatly appreciated, even if little thought went into the gift.

Personally, I think that the measure of a good gift is the joy it brings to the recipient. Part of the purpose of a gift exchange is to spread joy. If a gift brings joy to its recipient, I would say it was a good gift, even very little time, money, sacrifice, or thought was put into the gift. If the gift makes people happy, it's a good gift.

However, this means that the goodness of a gift depends largely on the mood of the receiver. If a person is already in a joyful mood, it wouldn't take much to make them even more joyful, but if a person is in a bad mood, it might take an especially good gift to make them feel any joy at all.

It seems unfair to judge the goodness of a gift on the mood of the recipient. Perhaps a gift is a good gift to receive if it brings the recipient joy, and perhaps it's a good gift to give if it was motivated by love.

Of course, these ideas are not doctrine, and many of them may need revision and/or replacement, but I still think they're a good rule of thumb. Cost and value don't matter. Sacrifice doesn't matter. What makes a gift good is the amount of love the giver puts into it and the amount of joy the recipient(s) get out of it.

By those metrics, the Atonement of Jesus Christ is easily the greatest gift of all time.

The Purpose and Meaning of Life

I had a brief conversation this afternoon about the importance of finding meaning and purpose in life. Without a clear purpose, it's hard to stay motivated. Yet, while some people make certain arguments about what the meaning of life is or how we each have to find our own purpose, we members of the church are blessed with additional knowledge about what the true meaning of life is. We know why we're here. We know what we're supposed to do while we're here. We know the purpose and meaning of life. I wish I had been bold enough to say something about it. We know the answers to some of life's biggest questions, including questions that have plague humanity for as long as anyone can remember. We should be generous in sharing those answers with others so they won't have to wonder about the purpose of life anymore either.

“Never Suppress a Generous Thought.”

The main point that I take away from Sister Michelle D. Craig's talk, Divine Discontent, is a short saying that originally came from Sister Kimball, the wife of President Spencer W. Kimball: “Never suppress a generous thought.”

I love that! “Never suppress a generous thought.” Sometimes when I have an impression to do something for someone, I wonder if it was a prompting or just my own thoughts. But I am reminded that “that which is of God inviteth and enticeth to do good continually; wherefore, every thing which inviteth and enticeth to do good, and to love God, and to serve him, is inspired of God.” (Moroni 7:13)

Whether they are direct promptings or just impulses to help, a good deed is never wasted, for “charity never faileth” (1 Corinthians 13:8)—and is never the wrong response.

I think I might adopt that saying as some kind of mantra. I am told that I often help people, and I do often help my family and friends, but there are also times when I have an opportunity to help strangers, and I sometimes let the opportunity pass, not wanting to make things awkward for either of us.

I also sometimes worry that I'm not as in tune with the Spirit as I should be. I often can't tell whether a thought in my head is divine inspiration or my mind playing tricks on me. However, in light of the scriptures Sister Craig has shared, that may not be a great concern. Whether the thought is divine or deranged, it is a good thought so long as it is a thought about doing good. "Every thing which inviteth and enticeth to do good . . . is inspired of God."

So, it seems that every generous thought is actually inspired by God, making each generous thought a divine prompting — a direct and personal commandment from God. I think I ought to take my generous thoughts more seriously and act on them more often.

Serving God by Serving in the Church

As one might expect from the title "For Him," Primary General President Joy D. Jones focused her talk on serving in the church for the purpose of serving God. We don't serve in the church in order to get the praise of other members of the church or to get other blessings. Ideally, we don't serve in the church just out of a sense of obligation, either. Rather, we should serve in the church out of a desire to serve the One whose church it is. God has done so much for us, the least we could do is to pay it forward by serving those whom God has asked us to serve. Even if we don't strongly love those whom we've been called to serve or the service we've been asked to do for them, we can still serve anyway, if for no other reason than to show our love and devotion to God. We don't have to love our callings. We don't have to love Ministering. We just have to love God enough to do them anyway, for His sake, and to learn to love His other children in the process.

Boros vs Rakdos

In the Magical city of Ravnica, there are ten great guilds, all of which are locked in an endless struggle for control, but instead of naming and describing each of the ten guilds of Ravnica, I'm going to focus on just two: Boros and Rakdos.

The Boros Legion is, with one notable competitor, perhaps the most Paladinic guild in Ravnica. Led by an angel named Aurelia, the Boros Legion is composed mostly of soldiers who battle against the forces of evil and chaos, holding those dark forces at bay.

One of those dark forces the Boros Legion holds back is the Cult of Rakdos. Led by the demon after which their cult is named, the Cult of Rakdos poses as some kind of morbid circus, causing as much pain, suffering, and chaos as it can while providing the less-morally-inclined with all the guilty pleasures a city can offer.

These two guilds provide excellent stand-ins for the ultimate battle between good and evil, at least in my own heart, and these two guilds in particular work very well for me in particular for a few specific reasons.

As I've already said, the Boros Legion is one of the most Paladinic guilds in Ravnica, and Boros narrowly beats out its closest competitor, at least in my mind, by embodying not only the devotion to goodness that I hope to emulate but also the fiery energy that is simultaneously one of my better and worse traits. Like me, the Boros are soldiers who fight against evil. Like me, the Boros possess a good deal of energy, but sometimes let their rage get the better of them. I fit well amongst the ranks of the Boros Legion.

Meanwhile, the Rakdos fit well as my main antagonists. Not only are they the most unapologetically evil guild in Ravnica, but they also mask that evil under the guise of fun. A handful of my faults involve what sorts of entertainment I seek and how much time I spend consuming it.

The Rakdos are also a good antagonist for me because they're not subtle. I've been fighting Satan long enough to know what tactics he uses against me. Those tactics don't involve stealth or cunning because, unfortunately, they don't have to. I know how Satan fights me, but I have yet to find and implement effective countermeasures again him. So far, my best response has been to fight harder, which is a very Boros answer.

The most encouraging and discouraging thing about this conflict involves something called the Guildpact. Over ten thousand years ago in Ravnica's history, the ten guilds of Ravnica ended a bloody conflict by signing a binding magical contract that prevents the guilds from attempting to destroy one another. The Boros cannot completely eliminate the Rakdos and the Rakdos cannot completely destroy the Boros. They can, and frequently do, have violent skirmishes, but unless the Guildpact is changed or broken (again), their conflict will be eternal.

And so will mine.

I cannot destroy Satan and he cannot destroy me. The best either of us could hope to do is bind and repress the other, but neither of us will ever stop fighting for freedom and control. This is encouraging because it means I cannot lose, but it's also discouraging because it means I can never really win. I can never stop fighting. I can never set my sword or shield down. I will be stuck fighting my demon for at least the rest of my mortal life, barring some sort of miracle. Because of my Savior's Atonement, I will never be hopeless, but because my foe is immortal, I will never be safe.

So, I go on fighting, and I will keep on fighting for my entire life. We might change tactics, as I probably should, but just like the conflicts that play out in Ravnica, the conflict inside me will never truly end.

Be Raised Incorruptible

This evening, I had an opportunity to participate in a Handel's Messiah Sing Along concert. As part of this concert, I joined several other basses in singing 48. Aria for Bass: The Trumpet Shall Sound, which reminded me of a thought I had at least a year ago and apparently hadn't blogged about yet. The Trumpet Shall Sound (and the recitative that precedes it) describes the moment of resurrection as Paul described it in his epistle to the Corinthians:

1 Corinthians 15:
51 Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,

52 In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.

53 For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality.

 This change means more than just becoming immortal. Living forever is only part of the benefit of being resurrected. Another part of the benefit is becoming "incorruptible."

I wonder what that means in this context. I could be as simple as meaning that we can't get sick or maimed or anything like that. Living forever is a given, but that doesn't necessarily mean that we will be whole and healthy. Thankfully, we have a promise that, once we have been resurrected, we will never become ill again. All our illnesses will be cured, and all our injuries will be healed. However, these benefits may all be considered under the "immortality" part of the change Paul described. Perhaps the "incorruptible" part extends beyond one's physical condition and instead focuses on our spirits.

When I think about corruption, I generally think about moral and/or spiritual corruption. Basically, in my mind, corruption is what Satan wants to happen to us, and while it has nothing to do with our physical bodies, it has everything to do with our mortal natures. Our ability to habitually make bad choices is a large part of what makes us corruptible in this sense. If we become "incorruptible" when we get resurrected, then that change could occur in a number of ways. It could mean that we can no longer make choices, or at least not bad choices. It could mean that we are impossible to persuade, or at least to effectively tempt. It could mean that we are so set in our ways that no force, not even Satan, can pull us off of them.

Or maybe I am completely misinterpreting "incorruptible."

In any case, resurrection is a great blessing, and I'm looking forward to receiving it after I die, even if it doesn't make me immune to temptation, as I would like to hope.

Holiday Stress vs the Christmas Spirit

I attended a live nativity tonight, but it didn't affect me as strongly as it had in previous years. This may be because I was still carrying some residual care from earlier in the day. Just before my family attended the nativity, we spent at least a few hours rushing about, buying things, trying to get things done. When we watched the live nativity, it had a calming effect on me, but that may be mostly the result of having an opportunity to sit down and not have to do anything, not even interact with others. Perhaps, if I had spent some quiet time sitting still and calming myself before the live nativity, I would have been in a better position to feel the Spirit I'm sure was there during the nativity.

So, my advice to all of you is to try to cut down on some of the business of the holidays. It's good to make and buy gifts and treats for others, but don't burn yourself out doing it. And if you're an introvert like I am, try to find a way to excuse yourself from the crowd and spend some alone time with the Savior. It's always important to make sure you can feel the Spirit, and that's especially true at Christmastime. If something makes it difficult for you to feel the Spirit, try to spend less time with it and more time with the Savior. We can't always manage that, because some holiday traditions, like shopping, are largely unavoidable, but I think we should try.

Habits sans Motivation

I read recently that habit will carry you through the motions of an action, even when motivation is non-existent. I suppose that's true, because it's very late, and I'm pretty tired, and though none of my ideas are fleshed out enough to blog about, I'm forcing myself not to go to bed until I've blogged about something. So, yeah, habits. Habits can be powerful. Try to develop good habits that will help you do the right thing, even when you don't want to, and try not to develop bad habits that will tempt you to do bad things, even when you're trying not to. These days, I blog partly, if not mostly, out of habit, but it's a good habit, and I'm glad that I (with God's prodding) chose to develop it.

Inner Peace on Earth

One of the blessings of the season is "Peace on Earth, Goodwill Toward Men." Goodwill is in good supply, if we look in the right places, but peace seems to be harder to come by. There is so much stress and toil in the world, so much danger and anger, so many catastrophes and other problems, it's a wonder that anyone can find any peace.

Yet, there are those who do. There are those who enjoy relative peace, though it seems that everyone has their own aggravating problems, but even among those facing the worst problems and trials, there are a few who know peace. That is because peace does not always mean an absence of trouble. Sometimes it means serenity in spite of one's troubles. There is an inner peace that can prevail regardless of our external circumstances.

There is an inner peace that can sustain us through our trials, and we access it through faith and hope in Jesus Christ. Through His Atonement, He can make right everything that is wrong with the world, including ourselves. Personally, a good deal of my peace comes from the knowledge that God is loving, wise, and merciful.

Despite the trials we experience in this Earth life, and despite the calamities that happen around us, or even to us, we can have peace through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and the power of His Atonement and Resurrection. Things may be bad now, and they may get worse as life progresses, but I know in my heart for absolutely certain, things will get better. All we need is faith, hope, and patience, and we can have inner peace.

The Blessings that Got Me Home

I often consider the blessings I have, particularly in the context that other people don't have those blessings. For example, I missed a train the other day, the one that would have gotten me to the bus I wanted to catch. I could easily have waited for the next train, and gotten on the next bus more than an hour later, and that would have been fine, but I knew that taking that route would get me home much later than I wanted, so I called my mom for a ride.

There are multiple layers of blessings there. I have a cell phone. I have a transit pass. I live in a country where public transit exists and is safe and usually reliable. I have a family I can count on to help me when they can. We have a car. We have a safe, comfortable home. I didn't have responsibilities that would have made it important for me to catch the earlier train. I felt safe waiting either for the following train or for my mom to pick me up. And, since Mom did pick me up, I got home an hour earlier than I thought I might.

Most of those blessings stem from living in a developed country in a city without too much crime. Some of them stem from being relatively well off. One of them, feeling safe, stems from being either naive or male. Almost all of them stem from forces that were or were almost entirely out of my control.

God gives everyone blessings. It may be fair to say that He gives some people more and/or better blessings than others, but all of us have blessings that other people don't have. I'm not sure what I should do with or about these blessings, but I figure that, at the very least, I should acknowledge them, be thankful for them, and recognize that there are other people who weren't born as lucky. We all have blessings that other people don't have. Sometimes we can share them, and other times we can't, but we should always acknowledge them and be thankful for them. It's too easy to become spoiled and to take everyday blessings for granted, but not everyone has the blessings that we consider "everyday" blessings, so we should at least be thankful for the blessings we enjoy every day.

"Don't Forget..."

Tonight, as I was making myself some hot chocolate, I noticed something that greatly frustrated me: A problem has reemerged. Specifically, The Mysterious Water Problem. Fortunately, the problem is no longer mysterious, and I immediately knew how to fix it. Unfortunately, the solution was still taxing and irritating, and I was already tired. The hot chocolate helped improve my energy level and mood, and my brother helped me clean up as well. As my brother and I wrapped up the first phase of cleanup and were about to call it a night, my brother told me "Don't forget your hot chocolate." I responded by saying that, in the face and wake of this kind of problem, I definitely wasn't going to forget my hot chocolate. However, that reminded me of something I had forgotten. I had forgotten to pray.

When sore trials came upon you,
Did you think to pray?
When your soul was full of sorrow,
Balm of Gilead did you borrow
At the gates of day?

Oh, how praying rests the weary!
Prayer will change the night to day.
So, when life gets dark and dreary,
Don’t forget to pray.

Finding water on the counter (again) is a relatively minor trial, but I was certainly sore of it. I wasn't "full of sorrow," but I was definitely weary. I had a very good reason to pray for grace, patience, and help, but I didn't. I just gulped down a few mouthfuls of hot chocolate, banged my head against the wall a few times, and got to work. Praying definitely would have helped me, yet I had forgotten to do it. It hadn't even crossed my mind. I hope that, the next time I face a frustrating trial, I remember this experience and, more importantly, remember to pray for help.

Dancing Blissfully Toward Misery

I had a weird assignment today. I had to help a student with some brainstorming for a paper arguing why a certain video presented an effective argument in favor of same-sex marriage. But here's the kicker: It kind of was one.

The video itself didn't really present an argument (at least, not the parts I saw). It presented a man who had practiced very hard to perform a dance for, and then propose to, the man he loved, who was a professional dance instructor. The dance was alright, and the fact that the dancer had practiced that dance, evidently as a surprise performance for his future husband, showed a good deal of devotion. Plus, having a hobby you can pursue together is almost definitely a good thing for any couple. I can imagine those two being very happy together.

In fact, that's what made the video as convincing as it was: happiness. At the moment of the proposal and for several long moments thereafter, everyone in the video seemed so very happy. And, well, I am in favor of happiness.

My only hangup here is that the happiness won't last, and I don't mean that in the same sense that applies to all relationships. The honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. It's as easy to fall out of love as it is to fall into it. That's not what I mean. I expect that that couple could be just as happy as any other couple for about as long as almost any other relationship might last.

But I know that their relationship won't last forever. We are eternal beings, and gender is an essential part of our eternal identities, but same-sex marriages are not part of God's eternal plan. Celestial marriages can last forever; same-sex marriages can't. I expect that the couple in the video did, does, and will enjoy a good deal of happiness, but unless they change their paths drastically, they will not experience lasting joy.

I am in favor of happiness, however one can get it, except at the cost of misery. The couple was happy in the video, and probably for a long time afterward, but I'm afraid that their happiness won't last forever, and I feel bad for them about that. Eventually, they will wish they had made different choices, so I also wish they had.

I don't have anything against same-sex couples any more than I have against other sinners who argue that their brand of sin should be accepted, celebrated, and normalized. I wish that they had made decisions that would have led them to eternal joy. It saddens me that they so blissfully travel down a path that leads to misery and that they seem to be so effective at convincing others to follow them.

Crossing the Dark Cultural Hall

Often, the darkest room in the church I attend is the Cultural Hall. It's basically a basketball court in the middle of the church, with hallways and classrooms all around it. Because of its central location, it's a great shortcut for traveling from one corner of the building to th other, or even just for slipping passed the crowds that gum up the hallways. Yet, because it doesn't have an exterior wall, it also doesn't have any windows, so when the lights are off, the only light in there are the EXIT signs and light coming in under the doors. Yet, even when it's near pitch black in there, the light under the doors at least tell me where the doors are, so I can easily travel from one door to another, making effective use of the shortcut, even though I have to walk through near total darkness to do so.

My confidence in traversing the dark cultural hall stems mostly from the fact that I can see my destination. As long as I know where I'm going, I can just walk in that direction, and I know I'll get there. In theory, this could almost work as an analogy for life. We can't always see as well as we would like, spiritually, but we know where we're trying to go, so as long as we keep heading in that direction, we should be fine.

However, there is one problem with this analogy: the cultural hall typically doesn't have any obstacles in it, but real life always does. We face countless challenges in mortality, and seeing them clearly tends to be essential to overcoming them and avoiding them. Without spiritual light, we're doomed. If there were obstacles in the cultural hall, they could cause serious problems for anyone who tries to pass through it. However, the cultural hall has something that life doesn't have: a light switch at every door. With those light switches, I could easily turn on a light in the cultural hall and not have to try to cross a shortcut in the dark. In real life, the obstacles are often much harder to spot and avoid, though with enough spiritual light, it is still possible.

Navigating through life is much more difficult than crossing an empty room, but as long as we keep headed toward our destination and have at least enough light to see the obstacles in our path, we should be alright.

Last Second Service

Today was, or was supposed to be, a special day of service for members of the church, but I had completely forgotten about that until my sister, who had been having an "off" day, came out of her room after a long nap and asked me to make her some quesadillas for dinner. As I did so, she reminded me about this day of service by telling me that this, making her dinner, counted.

I wouldn't have thought that doing such a small thing, especially for a family member, really counted as service. It seems too small and too (for a lack of a better term) expected. People are supposed to help their family. There's nothing "special" about that.

But I think that it still counts for something. If service is simply helping others, then making my sister some dinner certainly counts for at least that much. Whether it could be considered to be a special act of service, even though it was such a small gesture, is debatable, but small acts of service add up, and while I might doubt the importance of the service I do, I certainly wouldn't want others who offer similar service to do so. Mom cooks us meals all the time, and I want her to know that that counts and that we appreciate it.

So, sure, I guess that making my sister a light meal counts as doing some service for her, and I did it before midnight tonight, so I guess it counts as doing it "today," even though it's not "today" anymore as I'm writing this. It was only a small act of service, and it happened only about half an hour before midnight, but I suppose it technically counts as today's act of service.