The Truck Who Cried Ride-Along

The other night, I was asked to do a ride-along for the Bishop's Storehouse. Basically, someone drives a truck full of groceries from Point A to Point B, and I'm asked to tag along because that's church policy. Anyhow, this meant that I needed to get to the Bishop's Storehouse by 6:00 - 6:15 am this morning. Ultimately, I got there by 6:10, but by the time I got there, the truck had already left.

This wasn't the first time this has happened. I'm not sure if I blogged about it (I know I thought about blogging about it), but a while back, I was terribly late for a ride-along, arriving at 6:30 or some other dismally late time of day, and found that the truck had left without me - and with good reason. Those folks in Placerville, or wherever else the truck was headed that day, were expecting their groceries, and with no way of contacting me, the driver went on and delivered the groceries himself. I assume the same thing happened this morning.

The thing is that this time, I wasn't late. I arrived at the Storehouse within the time period by which I was expected to arrive. Granted, I wasn't there as early as I could have been expected to be there, and perhaps at 6:05 or promptly at 6:10, the driver decided that I, once again, had failed to show up, and that he had better deliver the groceries himself. My earlier failure to arrive on time may have caused the driver to believe that I had once again accidentally slept in.

Or perhaps the shoe was on the other foot this time. I arrived at 6:10 or 6:11, but I didn't stay long. When I saw that the truck wasn't there, I assumed it left before I arrived, as it had before, not considering that it might have been the truck driver who was late this time. Actually, the driver might not have even been late. He could have arrived at 6:13-6:15, and I wouldn't have known.

Because I had been late before, the driver may have assumed that I was late again and left without me, and because the driver had left without me before, I assumed that he had done so again, so I figured that there was no point in sticking around. One way or another, we both missed each other, and we each probably should have waited at the Storehouse a little longer.

They say that past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior. While that doesn't account for the possibility of someone learning from their mistakes, there is a decent amount of truth to it. What we do now will affect what others will expect us to do later. If we miss an appointment, it's only fair for others to expect that there's a high chance that we'll miss another appointment later. I don't blame the driver if he left without me, and I don't truly blame myself for guessing that he did. We were both at fault today, and we each only have our past and present selves to blame.

How to Gain Enough Confidence to Come Unto Him

After scaring our pants off with the idea of having a personal interview with the Savior, Elder Jorg Klebingat reminded us about how we're supposed to feel about such a meeting, and how we could feel, if we prepare for it. Yesterday, I shared the first half of the first paragraph of his talk. Here's the second half:

Would sins, regrets, and shortcomings dominate your self-image, or would you simply experience joyful anticipation? Would you meet or avoid His gaze? Would you linger by the door or confidently walk up to Him?

Elder Klebingat taught us that the feelings of doubt and dread come from the adversary.

The adversary knows that faith in Christ—the kind of faith that produces a steady stream of tender mercies and even mighty miracles—goes hand in hand with a personal confidence that you are striving to choose the right. For that reason he will seek access to your heart to tell you lies—lies that Heavenly Father is disappointed in you, that the Atonement is beyond your reach, that there is no point in even trying, that everyone else is better than you, that you are unworthy, and a thousand variations of that same evil theme.

Notice that Elder Klebingat called all those things lies. It is a lie to think that Heavenly Father is disappointed in you. The Atonement of Jesus Christ is not beyond our reach. There are still good reasons to keep striving to be righteous. You are not worse than everybody else. And you are worthy of God's love.

These are encouraging thoughts, and I believe that many of them are true, but I wonder about one of them. Is it a lie to think that Heavenly Father might be disappointed in me? I try to be righteous, but I sometimes fail. Wouldn't He be disappointed in me then? Isn't He disappointed when I get frustrated and angry, sometimes even with Him? Or is He just happy that I'm still trying to become a better person, even if I often fail at that? God is sometimes very patient in extending mercy, and sometimes He's rather vengeful in meting out justice. How long can I expect Him to be patient with me before He ultimately gives up on me? If I were Him, I'd have given up on me years ago. Hasn't He? Won't He?

I can imagine Heavenly Father being disappointed in me without giving up on me, but I can't imagine God giving up on me without Him being disappointed in me first. If what Elder Klebingat said is true, that it's a lie to think that Heavenly Father is disappointed in me as long as I'm trying to be righteous, then I'd guess that means that He hasn't given up on me, and so there's still hope. If that's true, then I'd say there's hope for anyone who's trying to follow God, even if they're doing very, very poorly at it.

I'd bet that a lot of people suffer from a lack of confidence before God. Elder Klebingat must have taken that bet, too, since he dedicated his Conference Talk to such feelings. In doing so, he presented six suggestions that will help us dispel feelings of self-doubt and restore feelings of confidence in our spiritual standing with God.

The first suggestion is to "take responsibility for our own spiritual well-being." This can be a painful choice to make, but we can't approach God honestly if we blame others for the way we are. God knows that we struggle with human weaknesses and that we will occasionally succumb to our weaknesses, through little or no fault of our own. But He also knows whether we're actually struggling against those weaknesses or not. If we only accept our weaknesses as just being part of who we are, we will never become better than the way we are right now. On the other hand, if we accept that this is the way we are now, but continue to strive to improve ourselves, God will be patient with our weaknesses, and those weaknesses will help us to become strong.

Elder Klebingat's second suggestion is to "take responsibility for our physical well-being," but in the name of time, I'm going to skip that one. If you feel that this may apply to you, I encourage you to review Elder Klebingat's talk yourself.

The third suggestion is to "embrace voluntary, whole-hearted obedience as part of your life." I'm not sure how well I like this one. I love the "voluntary obedience" part, but I'm a bit worried about the "whole-hearted" part. It reminds me of the "behavioral blank check" I had apprehensions about a few days ago. Though I ultimately decided to at least try to be obedient to all of God's commandments, even His future ones, whatever they may be, I wonder how willing I am to give all of my heart to God. There are some things that I enjoy doing that may not be completely in harmony with all of God's teachings, but that I don't feel ready to give up yet. I know that God doesn't have a problem with wholesome recreation, but what of recreation that's slightly less wholesome? Clean, peaceful video games are fine, in moderation, but what about Mario games, which involve kicking turtles around and throwing fireballs at walking mushrooms? The video game industry refers to this as "comic mischief," but I must admit that it's at least a little bit violent. It's probably not the kind of thing that Heavenly Father fully approves of, but it's not so bad that I need to give it up, is it?

Elder Klebingat said that "you can’t watch a bad movie and expect to feel virtuous because you did not watch a very bad one," and that "choosing something bad over something worse is still choosing wrong." I guess that answers my question. But still, I don't want to have to stop playing video games completely. I want to follow Jesus Christ, but I don't want to be so Christlike that I stop playing games with mild violence in them. Not yet, anyway. I'll have to blog more about this later. I'm running out of time and I have three more suggestions to list.

The fourth suggestion is to "become really, really good at repenting thoroughly and quickly." Repenting quickly is something that bothers me a little bit because it feels too easy. I feel like I need to suffer some remorse for my sins before I repent. I feel like I need to feel bad about myself, to punish myself, I guess, before I repent, and meting out my punishment for my wrongdoings is not my job - it's Gods. I should let Him decide how long and how hard I suffer before my sins are forgiven. He, through His prophets, has counseled us to repent quickly, so He can forgive us quickly when He's willing to. Sometimes, He'll let us "learn our lesson" but other times, we make ourselves suffer more than we need to because we feel unworthy of God's forgiveness, but we should let God be the judge of that - not us.

The fifth suggestion is to "become really, really good at forgiving." The assignment of punishment is God's job in both our case and in the cases of others. God will be just, or He will be merciful, but He has commanded us to be merciful, so we don't cause others to suffer any more than He thinks they should. Also, when we refuse to forgive others, we suffer a bit for it as well.

Elder Klebingat's final suggestion is to "accept trials, setbacks, and 'surprises' as part of your mortal experience." Life happens. Sometimes, life can be pretty rough. I'll admit that sometimes, God uses the trials of life to remind us that we need His help, and that we may need to repent of a few things to get it, but a lot of the time, God uses the natural trials of life to give us opportunities to overcome them and become stronger. Not all earthly trials are godly punishments for wrongdoings. Sometimes, they're really only there to give us experience. Elder Klebingat said:

Some trials come through your own disobedience or negligence. Other trials come because of the negligence of others or simply because this is a fallen world. When these trials come, the adversary’s minions begin broadcasting that you did something wrong, that this is a punishment, a sign that Heavenly Father does not love you. Ignore that! Instead, try to force a smile, gaze heavenward, and say, “I understand, Lord. I know what this is. A time to prove myself, isn’t it?” Then partner with Him to endure well to the end.

God doesn't want us or anyone to suffer any more than we need to. Sometimes, we need to suffer to get us to repent, and sometimes we need to suffer to become stronger. God will help us to judge between those things as we strive to follow Him. God wants us to come closer to Him, to "partner with Him" to help us understand and do what's right. He's not against us. God will never side against us. He always wants what's best for us. I still think that God may be disappointed in me sometimes, but I know now that God will never give up on me. He loves me. He loves all of us. And when we come home to Him, He'll be standing there ready to welcome us with open arms, ready to embrace us, if we're confident enough to come unto Him.

A Frightening Reminder

Most speakers at General Conference open their remarks with an amusing anecdote or remark, perhaps even a joke or some other manifestation of wit and humor. Not Elder Jorg Klebingat. He began his message by asking such questions as would fill with fear the souls of anyone who has a soul and is aware of the fact. And since Halloween is approaching, and this talk seems far more interesting to me know than the previous two talks which I intentionally skipped and might get back to later, I thought I'd repeat Elder Klebingat's questions to give us all a good scare.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your spiritual confidence before God? Do you have a personal witness that your current offering as a Latter-day Saint is sufficient to inherit eternal life? Can you say within yourself that Heavenly Father is pleased with you? What thoughts come to mind if you had a personal interview with your Savior one minute from now?

I can tell you right now that if I knew that I was going to have a personal interview with the Savior exactly one minute from now, those would be the most terrifying 60 seconds of my life. I am not ready to die. Elder Klebingat went on to ask whether our minds would be filled with memories of sins and regrets, or whether we would actually look forward to meeting our Maker and greeting Him as we would a friend. Of course, Jesus is supposed to be our Friend. Or rather, He is our Friend and we are supposed to be His. But for most of us, there is some concern about what Jesus must think of us, and more particularly of what we've done. Personally, I'd spend those 60 seconds repenting, and fearing that I was repenting too late.

How many seconds do you think I have left? More than 60, I hope. Several thousand, perhaps? A few million, even? A song I once heard reminds us that there are 525,600 minutes in a year. Multiply that number by 60, and you get 31,536,000 seconds in one year. Given that I'm in my 20's and have at least a few more decades left in me, the number of seconds I have left could be up in the billions. In light of that, I should have plenty of time to get my life in order and fully repent of all my sins. But do I?

In a few minutes, I'll be on my way to Math class. I'll go carefully, of course, but others might not be so cautious, and I may not see them in time, assuming I see them coming at all. The truth of the matter is that I could die almost any second. I may not have as many as 60 seconds left. If I would choose to spend my last 60 seconds on earth repenting, and if I know that I may or may not have quite that much time, why am I not repenting right now?

God has a funny way of blessing people sometimes. Sometimes, He inspires us with visions of heaven, encouraging us to do whatever it takes to get there. Other times, He inspires us with a healthy fear of hell and a strong desire to do whatever it takes to stay away from there. Sometimes, God needs to scare us to get us to repent. Preferably, He shouldn't need to. Whether we have only a few seconds left, or several billion, we should spend at least part of that time repenting. And for our sakes, we had better do it soon. Our final interview is coming. We'd do well to get ready for it.

World Series vs the Olympics

Apparently, there are some important games going on right now. Baseball, I think. The Giants, whom I think are from New York, vs the Royals from I'm-not-sure-where. The Giants are winning, but they have at least one more game to go. If they win that game, then they're World Series Champions, which is really awesome for them, and I'm sure they're very excited about it, but I'm sure how much I care.

But here's the weird thing: I don't care about the World Series, but I do care about the Olympics. There are a few reasons for this. One is on a world-wide scale while the other, I think, is only in the US. The Olympics are more entertaining to watch than baseball, with a greater variety of sports. But one of the major reasons I like the Olympics is also a good reason to care about the World Series. I like to watch people win.

Of course, it's not just the winning that excites me - it's the story behind the winning. I like to hear about how people practiced and struggled and ultimately overcame. For example, if an athlete trained all their lives to become a world-class athlete, but then suffered an injury that almost ended their career, or lost too many times and almost gave up, but then after months and years of training and fighting for their dreams, they made it back to the Olympics, I'd find that story pretty inspiring.

Then why am I not inspired by the World Series? Theoretically, there should be a dozen stories like that mixed into a single baseball team. Not all of them have been injured, but they all had to struggle and train hard to get where they are. They overcame challenge after challenge, and now, together, they're going to become Champions. That could be a very inspiring story - if I ever heard it.

When I hear about baseball players, I generally only hear their stats. How many hits did they get last year? How many runs? How many home runs? How fast can they pitch? How far can they throw? And so forth. Sometimes I hear about who they were traded to and who they were traded for, as if people could be traded. I guess that's the real reason I care about the Olympics and not professional sports. In pro sports, we're supposed to be loyal to a team, whatever its roster is, and we hear so little about the individual athletes. In the Olympics, it's all about the athletes, and I like that.

When I look at Olympic athletes, struggling and striving to overcome their personal challenges, I see myself striving to overcome mine. When they win, it gives me hope that I can win. When I look at professional athletes playing in a big game, I don't actually see the athletes. I see guys in blue shirts trying to keep a ball away from guys in white shirts. There are no individuals - no stories, inspiring or otherwise - just two teams and a game. Granted, it can be fun to watch, but I'm not likely to get into it the same way I get into the Olympics. In the end, I don't want to see one team overcome another team. I want to see one person overcome themselves.

Love Despite Disagreement

In the Saturday Afternoon Session of this last General Conference, Elder Dallin H. Oaks gave a talk about love and tolerance. Since I've heard another message about love and tolerance recently, and I just saw this quote from Elder Oak's talk on Facebook, I think I'd have to be pretty thick to not get the message.

What this talk does not include, but Elder Oaks' talk and the other message did, is the concept of loving others, even of other sexual orientations. We, as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, are in a difficult position in respect to those who are attracted to people of the same gender as themselves. We try to be loving and tolerant, but we find it so terribly awkward. On top of the weakening social awkwardness on the topic of same-sex attraction, we are influenced by the knowledge that sexual transgressions, including same-sex physical relationships, are serious sins. Despite our love for our brothers and sisters, or rather, because of it, we feel the need to warn them of the consequences of acting on their inclinations. To make matters even more difficult, there's the question of same-sex marriage. While same-sex couples fight to freedom and equality, we fight to uphold God's standards and His definition of marriage. Thus, we make opponents, and thus enemies, of those that we claim to love and try to befriend.

At the end (and toward the beginning) or Elder Oaks' talk, he said, "As difficult as it is to live in the turmoil surrounding us, our Savior’s command to love one another as He loves us is probably our greatest challenge." "It is difficult because we must live among those who do not share our beliefs and values and covenant obligations."

If everyone had the same values and beliefs, living and getting along with one another would be much easier. Unfortunately, the Lord has never been much concerned with what's "easier." He commands us to do what's right. In a past blog post, I said that we all can and should "Act According to [Our] Beliefs," and not hate each other for doing so. This ties in to my thoughts about rivals. People can be on opposing teams, even on opposing sides of an important issue, while still not being enemies. They should both be courteous and respectful, and win or lose as graciously as they can, but they can still, as Elder Oaks put it, disagree without being disagreeable.

Another point that I should make is that, win or lose, I think people retain the right, and perhaps even the obligation, to disagree. Elder Oaks taught that while "Loving-kindness is required, ...a follower of Christ—just like the Master—will be firm in the truth."

I hope the same-sex community and their sympathizers will forgive me, but I believe that some things, including same-sex marriage and intimacy, are against God's laws, and that some of them, including same-sex marriage, should be against the laws of the land as well. You, of course, are entitled to you beliefs, and I hope that you vote and petition according to your heart-felt beliefs, as I will continue to vote and petition according to mine. We may have to agree to disagree on this topic, but we don't have to hate each other for that. As God's children we should all try to love and respect each other, despite the differences in our beliefs. I don't hate any of you, and I hope that none of you hate me. God teaches us to love one another, and I know that we can do that, even when we disagree.

Uphill, Downhill

Okay, let's try this again.

The reason I was so frustrated with this quote the other day was because I couldn't find the talk that it came from. That was partly because it didn't come from a talk. It came from President Eyring's book, "Seek Higher Ground." Also, according to deseretnews.com, President Eyring was quoting his mother's advice when he shared that, so the quote should actually be attributed to her.

But that's enough of a rant for this morning. Now I want to blog about why I wanted to blog about this quote in the first place.

Doing the right thing is usually difficult, and many apostles have related our spiritual progression to climbing a mountain or a hill. It's long and it's difficult, but the view is amazing, and there's safety in seeking the higher ground.

Alternatively, we could steer our lives in the other direction. If there's a hill and we're climbing it, we could theoretically climb back down. If we do, the going will be easier, ("It's all downhill from here"), but if we follow that path, we'll quickly find that our lives are "going downhill," and that's not a trajectory we want our lives to have. At least, it's not a trajectory I want my life to have.

I want to make progress. I want to do good and become a better person, even if the path of eternal progression is uphill and, at times, rather steep. It's a hard road to follow, but I need the blessings that come from striving to be righteous. Sure, it'd be easier to just not care about anything and let my life go downhill, but that's not going to get me anywhere I want to go. I'm going to the Celestial Kingdom, and the direction I need to go to get there is up.

Games with the Kids

I'm blogging a little bit late today because I've been playing games with one of my nephews and two of my nieces. It's been lots of fun, but it has kept me away from one of my obligations. I suppose I need to work on my priorities. That's been something of a theme in my life lately.

Frustrations

You know what God is trying to teach me right now? You can't have the Spirit with you when you're angry. That's why I'm not getting much out of Pathway and it's why I can't blog about something I want to blog about this morning: because they're frustrating me and making me angry.

But actually, can anything literally make a person angry, or does the person still have some control over how they feel? I don't think anything can force us to assume a certain emotional state, but at the same time, it's really hard not to feel certain ways in some situations. If someone you really love died, it'd be hard not to feel sad about it. If you're trying to blog about feeling frustrated, but the computer you're using to share your feelings keeps crashing, it'd be hard not to feel frustrated about that. I'm sure that I could force myself to feel peaceful and happy, despite the fact that everything is frustrating me, but I don't have a strong enough will-power, and that's really frustrating, too.

Am I allowed to feel frustrated and upset and angry sometimes? Is that okay? Or is it a sin to have such negative emotions? In School Thy Feelings, O My Brother, President Monson said "The Apostle Paul asks in Ephesians, chapter 4, verse 26 of the Joseph Smith Translation: 'Can ye be angry, and not sin?'" but I can't remember if he ever answered that question. Maybe the answer is 'yes.' Maybe a person can be upset and even angry sometimes without offending God. But then President Monson said this: "I ask, is it possible to feel the Spirit of our Heavenly Father when we are angry? I know of no instance where such would be the case."

So I guess I need to overcome my feelings of frustration and anger, no matter how justified I think they may be. It won't always be easy, but if I can't have the Spirit with me when I'm frustrated, I'm going to have to learn how to deal with that feeling and overcome it.

Laws for Protection

You know that rule about biking only on the right side of the street (unless it's a one-way street, on which you may ride on the left, if you can get there safely)? It, and certain other traffic rules, seemed somewhat pointless to me, and especially inconvenient. On my commute to school each morning, I need to go west from my street, but my street connects to a one-way street going east. Usually, I just go west, against the flow of traffic, and then get onto the right side of the road when it's convenient for me, but I won't be doing that today. Recently, a friend of mine got into an accident by riding on the wrong side of the street. Thankfully, they're mostly okay, but it was something of a wake-up call for me, and it reminded me that some laws exist for good reasons. At least, God's laws certainly do.

Sometimes, certain commandments don't make sense to us, and almost always, they're at least a little bit inconvenient. Sometimes, we try to bend the rules or justify breaking them, mostly because we don't really understand why they exist and what they do for us. Just like the rule to ride on the right side of the street, God's commandments exist to protect us. We live in a dangerous world, full of alluring temptations to follow the wrong paths. Sometimes it's difficult, or at least inconvenient, to find and follow the right path, but that's what keeps us safe. And one of God's top priorities is to keep His children safe. That's why He gave us commandments - to help us keep from getting hurt and from hurting each other. I don't always keep God's commandments or do everything I should, and I usually get burned when I don't. So today, I'm going to try to make better choices. For one thing, for today at least, I'm going to make sure I stay on the right side of the road.

The Quest of a Lifetime

I couldn't stop blogging about President Uchtdorf's Saturday Morning talk without sharing the quote from that talk that most stood out to me: "Let us acknowledge that most often gaining a testimony is not a task of a minute, an hour, or a day. It is not once and done. The process of gathering spiritual light is the quest of a lifetime."

As a person who's probably just a little bit too fond of fantasy, the word "quest" jumped out at me, especially since it's "the quest of a lifetime." It sounds epic. But what President Uchtdorf actually meant is slightly less exciting. He meant that gathering spiritual light, or gaining a testimony, is going to take a really long time. In fact, none of us will ever finish gathering spiritual light within our lifetimes. Gaining a testimony is a quest that will continue for all our mortal years and beyond.

This, too, can be epic, in its own way. It means that there's so much spiritual light available to us that we couldn't possibly gather it all in in one lifetime. There will always be more glorious truths to learn and experience to gain. In my math class, I find that I'm excited when I learn to understand a new concept and find out how to use it to easily solve problems that look daunting. I imagine that our eternal education will be just as exciting. It will be fun to learn how God does what He does, and learn how to do it ourselves. Perhaps I'm going a bit beyond what President Uchtdorf meant, but I think that all truth is light, and that we'll be gathering such light, if we're willing, for all eternity.

Back to Uchtdorf's original meaning, it may seem like a slow and arduous process, and it can be discouraging to think of how little light we have, but take heart. Your testimony will continue to grow for as long as you live, if you let it. It may seem small and weak now, don't worry. It'll grow. On the other hand, if you think your testimony is already strong enough, think again. If God doesn't test the strength of your testimony, Satan will, so we should be constantly trying to strengthen our testimonies so we can pass the tests of life. It's not over until it's over. No matter how much or little spiritual light you have, keep gathering it.

Galaxies and God - A Lesson on Disbelief and Faith

Perhaps the technical difficulties with the blog post on not seeing stars were well-timed. The next Conference talk down the line is President Uchtdorf's Receiving a Testimony of Light and Truth, which opens with a quick lesson on the history of astronomy"

It was less than a century ago that most astronomers assumed that our Milky Way galaxy was the only galaxy in the universe. They supposed all that lay beyond our galaxy was an immense nothingness, an infinite void—empty, cold, and devoid of stars, light, and life. 

As telescopes became more sophisticated—including telescopes that could be launched into space—astronomers began to grasp a spectacular,almost incomprehensible truth: the universe is mind-bogglingly bigger than anyone had previously believed, and the heavens are filled with numberless galaxies, unimaginably far away from us, each containing hundreds of billions of stars. 

...before mankind had instruments powerful enough to gather celestial light and bring these galaxies into visibility, we did not believe such a thing was possible.

President Uchtdorf  goes on to explain that it's hard to believe in that which we cannot see. Though those other galaxies were there all along, we couldn't see them, so we didn't believe that they existed. In Why We Can't See Stars, I hope I made it clear that while I was talking about seeing God's light, I meant seeing evidence of God's existence and love for us, not literally seeing the light that God generates when He appears to people. Only a very few people in the world's history have been privileged to literally see God. The rest of us just have to trust that He really is there. Even when we do everything we can to cut out the distractions in our lives, humble ourselves, and try to attune our eyes to the light of God, we still probably won't see Him, and some measure of faith will always be required.

I do not know that other galaxies exist. I've been told that they exist, and I've been shown images of them, but I do not know of their existence for myself. Even if I was allowed to look through a telescope and see galaxies other than our own, I probably couldn't help thinking of how easy it would be to embed a computer screen into a device than merely looks like a telescope. There would always be some doubt, and I would always need some faith.

The same goes for knowing that God exists, that there is life after death, and that the scriptures and words of the prophets are true. The prophets and our own hearts may tell us that certain things are true, just as astronomers and telescopes can tell us about other planets and galaxies, but it will always take some faith to believe them. And some people have trouble coming up with that kind of faith. In fact, I think we all do sometimes. Sometimes, we can't bring ourselves to believe in things that we haven't observed for ourselves. Sometimes we feel that we need to see a thing ourselves to believe in its existence, and while that may be a wise course of action in some situations, like needing to personally see a platform before jumping halfway across a chasm to land on it (or miss it and fall to you death, as would happen if the platform wasn't really there), but some things are better when we accept them by faith, even if they aren't really there.

I'm pretty sure that God exists. Since there's always some need for faith and some room for doubt, it's hard to be 100% sure, but I'm pretty darn sure He's out there somewhere, and even if He isn't, I think it makes sense to believe in Him anyway. A belief in God encourages people to behave righteously. Believing in God generally makes people better people. Even if there is no God, believing in Him will help make the world a better place for everyone. It doesn't truly matter whether other galaxies exist. We're never going to reach them and I doubt we'll learn much from them, so whether they exist or not doesn't have much of an impact on us and our world, but believing in God, and encouraging others to believe in Him, will make life better for almost everyone. I haven't seen God. I don't know that He exists. But I'm going to act as if I do know, partly because it'll make me a better person, and partly because I'm still pretty darn sure that He exists.

Why We Can't See Stars

(This is yesterday's blog post. I don't know why it wasn't published yesterday. I thought the computer said it was.)

I just saw an inspirational quote that says "Stars can't shine without darkness," but I think I'd rephrase that. The stars are always shining. It's just that we can't see them if there's too much other light around us (or maybe it has something to do with whatever sunlight does to the sky to make it blue. I don't know anything about light or astronomy). Anyway, my point is that the stars are always shining - it's just that we can't always see them, just like God is always there, but we don't always see that He's there, and I can think of at least two reasons for that.

First, I'd like to give a little bit of credibility back to the quote I just argued against. "Stars can't shine without darkness." God is always there for us, but we don't always turn to Him. Sometimes, we foolishly think that we're doing well enough on our own, or that God wouldn't bother to help us. It's when things get really bad in our lives, our darkest moments, if you will, that we turn to God for help, and discover that He's been there with us all long. We just couldn't see Him because we weren't looking for Him, and sometimes things have to get really bad before we start looking.

Another reason we can't see stars all the time is that there's usually too much light around us. Look at the night sky when you're in the city, then look at the night sky when you're out in nature, and you'll see what I mean. Sometimes, there are just too many mortal distractions keeping us from focussing on God. There's too much hustle and bustle, keeping us too busy to think about eternal things. If we can cut out some of those distractions from our lives, or find a quiet moment to meditate and pray, we can look up to the heavens and see the subtle light.

Hopefully, it won't take an hour of darkness to drive us to our knees. Hopefully, we can be the kind of people who try to attune ourselves to God's light anyway, whether times are good or bad. Let us try to find God, even when it seems that we don't need Him, because we always need Him, and it's better to remember that now than it is to wait for God to remind us.

Prayer and Priorities in Goal-Setting

In the Pathway program, we're currently learning about choices and goal-setting. As part of this learning, we're participating in a discussion in which we of us responds to one of a number of prompts, and then we each respond to each other. For my initial discussion board post, I had to choose between writing about prayer and goal-setting, and priorities in goal-setting. Right now, I'd like to blog about both.

In my discussion board post, I wrote about how our priorities shape our goal-setting and our individual choices. If you have to choose between doing either of two things in one afternoon, you have to choose whichever one you want to do more than the other. This pattern holds true on a larger scale as well. If you have to choose between doing either of two things with your one lifetime, you have to choose whichever one you want to accomplish more than the other. Then, you should set goals and make plans to remind you of the priority you set for yourself.

The trouble is that there aren't only two choices. There are thousands, and picking the best set of priorities and goals to match your own talents, abilities, personality, and future opportunities can be impossible, especially if you make your choices at random, or based on your own thoughts and feelings. It's better to set our goals on priorities established by Someone with greater foresight than ours, Someone who knows us and our futures better than we do, and Someone who desires less for us than the best future we could possibly have.

By seeking God's help in setting our goals and priorities, we can make more wise and inspired decisions, leading to a better future than we could have had by making choices at random. Must successful people became successful by making plans and following them with determination. If we enlist God's help in making our plans, all the better. We need to establish our priorities before we set firm goals, and we're far more likely to set the right priorities if we try to do so through prayer.

Agency and Accountability at War

While we're still blogging insights gained from Elder Christofferson's talk, I want to address the debate he cited at the beginning of his talk. The debate was between a disguised King Henry and his troops:

At one point King Henry declares, “Methinks I could not die any where so contented as in the king’s company; his cause being just.” 

Michael Williams retorts, “That’s more than we know.” 

His companion agrees, “Ay, or more than we should seek after; for we know enough, if we know we are the king’s subjects: if his cause be wrong, our obedience to the king wipes the crime of it out of us.” 

Williams adds, “If the cause be not good, the king himself hath a heavy reckoning to make." 

Not surprisingly, King Henry disagrees. “Every subject’s duty is the king’s; but every subject’s soul is his own.”

According to Elder Christofferson, the playwright, William Shakespeare, never answers this debate, and for a time, I thought that Elder Christofferson didn't either, since we went on to talk about who's responsible for what happens to us, which in my opinion, is an entirely separate matter than who's responsible for what we do, though I suppose it deserves consideration, as Elder Christofferson certainly thought it did:

When things turn bad, there is a tendency to blame others or even God. Sometimes a sense of entitlement arises, and individuals or groups try to shift responsibility for their welfare to other people or to governments.

This is contrary to the nature of God's plan. He expects us to provide for ourselves as much as possible, and to forgive others if they, in any way, make life more difficult for us. When difficult circumstances arrive, it's our responsibility to endure them as well as we can, and see if we can make something positive out of the negative situation, rather than to try to pin the blame on whomever we think may be at fault. In that sense, the responsibility is ours.

But who is responsible for what we do? The answer seems obvious: we are; but what if we're just following orders, or acting as required by the laws of the land? Tying the concept back to King Henry's soldiers, who would be morally responsible if King Henry ordered his men to slaughter innocents, and they did? Would the king be responsible because he gave the order, or would the soldiers be responsible because they carried it out?

Elder Christofferson said:

God intends that His children should act according to the moral agency He has given them, “that every man may be accountable for his own sins in the day of judgment.” It is His plan and His will that we have the principal decision-making role in our own life’s drama.

This seems to pin the blame on the soldiers, who, according to D&C 101: 78, are "accountable for [their] own sins." If they do something, the responsibility (good or bad) for that thing falls on them, no matter who or what told them to do it.

But what of the king, then? Is he off the hook for what his soldiers do because they're accountable for themselves, or is he at least partially responsible for what they do, given that he ordered them to do it? My opinion is that he, too, is responsible for how his soldiers act while under orders. We are each responsible for what we do, but that includes what we do to influence others. If I encourage someone to write a kind letter to someone, that's a good thing, even though they, not I, are the one writing the letter. If I advise someone to rob a bank, then that's a bad thing, even if I never get directly involved in the robbery. If someone has the ability to influence others for good or for evil, they have the responsibility to influence them for good, just as a person who has the ability to do either good or evil has the responsibility to do good.

So, if King Henry gave an order to slaughter a village full of innocent people, and his soldiers carried that order out, they'd both be responsible to God for what they did. Is that how it is in our own military? Do our soldiers have the moral responsibility to follow orders, even if those orders are evil, or do they have the moral responsibility to disobey evil orders? If one of our military commanders gave a soldier an order to kill an innocent person in cold blood, what should the soldier do?

This is a really tough question because, on the one hand, we don't want soldiers who'd heartlessly obey evil orders. We don't want to be that kind of country. On the other hand, we can't afford to have soldiers who disobey orders. I think I'd forgive a soldier who did something evil that he didn't want to do, but did anyway because he was commanded to do it. I wouldn't forgive his commander as easily, but I'd forgive the soldier. But would God? "God intends that His children should act according to the moral agency He has given them, 'that every man may be accountable for his own sins in the day of judgment.'" I don't think God would let the soldier off the hook for "just following orders."

But then, what should he do? Should he just do nothing? Should he act against his commander somehow? If so, how? Not violently, I hope, but depending on the situation, that may be necessary. Hopefully, a soldier who has desires to do what's right and obey God would receive inspiration from God as to what he should do in that situation, because I certainly don't know what would be the best course of action would be. If I ever found myself in that situation, I don't know what I would do. Except pray. If I were ever in that situation, at the very least, I would most definitely pray.

God's Immutable Laws

I'm sorry that I wasn't able to post this this morning. I've been having computer problems.

There’s one thing that I wish more people would understand: Truth exists. There is such a thing as unyielding, unchangeable truth that is not at all influenced by anyone’s opinions, interpretation, or disbelief. Certain things are true. Period.

In his talk Free Forever, To Act For Themselves, Elder D. Todd Christopherson gave a brief example, citing the law of gravity: Resenting the law of gravity won’t keep a person from falling if he steps off a cliff. The same is true for eternal law and justice. We can ignore or disbelieve in God’s laws, but the consequences of breaking those laws will follow, whether we believe they will or want them to or not. Truth is not subject to our acceptence of it.

Nor is it subject to reason. In the hymn, O My Father, the third line of the third verse asks a yes or no question of some doctrinal importance, then answers it “No, the thought makes reason stare.” However, I fail to see what reason, especially our limited, human reason, has to do with eternal truths. Immagine if reason DID stare at an eternal truth, saying that it couldn’t possibly be true because it doesn’t make any sense. Would the truth become untrue if it refused to comply with reason? Does the law of gravity not work because I don’t understand it? The law of gravity states that all objects in the universe are pulled on by every other object, but why? There are no strings connecting them. I’ve been told that everything has a gravitational “field,” but what about objects outside of the range of that field? And how could a small, simple object like a block of wood generate any kind of energy field at all. It doesn’t make sense to me; Therefore, it must not be true.

But it is. The law of gravity is true whether I understand it or not. And God’s laws are true whether sinners and atheists agree with them or not. Truth is not subject to reason or belief. God is God, and He’d still be God even if everyone unanimously decided that He isn’t. It doesn’t matter what we believe; God’s truths are not contingent on our faith. We can disbelieve in the hardness of a rock, but it’ll still hurt if we stub our toe on it.

So, what’s the purpose in having faith in God’s truths? If they’re not dependent on whether we have faith in them, why doesn’t it matter whether we believe in them or not? Ask your stubbed toe why it’s important to have faith in the hardness of rocks. This is just my personal opinion, so it may or may not be true, and the truth (whatever it is) is unaffected by this opinion’s existence, but I think that God didn’t make the rules any more than Newton invented gravity: he just found out about the rules and told us what they are. Another way of saying it is that God didn’t put a rock in front of our feet and make it hard so it’d hurt when we stub our toes on it. The rock was already there and it was already hard. God just told us about the rock and warned us about the pain it could cause because He doesn’t want us to get hurt. The laws of God are so immutible that I don’t think even He could change them. Perhaps that’s because they aren’t really His rules to change any more than the law of gravity belongs or is subject to Newton. We call it “Newton’s Law of Gravity” because he told us about it. Perhaps we call them the “Laws of God” for the same reason.

What’s true is true, regardless of our belief or disbelief in it. It’s unshaken by human reason, and it is not at all affected by our opinions or preferences. We may not like, understand, or agree with the law of gravity or the hardness of rocks, but that will not change the effect those laws will have on us if a rock falls on our head. The commandments are like a street sign telling us to watch for falling rocks. We can heed the warning, or we can ignore it, but I’ll tell you this: We may choose to disregard the laws of God, but we will not be able to ignore them for long.

A Day of Undeserved Miracles

Yesterday went surprisingly well - much better than it should have. It started with me arriving at Math class a little late, but it was Test day, so being late didn't matter a heck of a lot as long as I was able to complete the test on time. The problem was that I couldn't. I got stuck on a problem that should have been easy, but I kept making dumb mistakes. I should have studied for the test, but I though that I already knew the material well enough. Apparently, I need to keep practicing, because that one question took me forever, and I mentioned to the teach that, though I was sure I had gotten all the questions I could answer right, I was going to get a bad grade on the test because I hadn't been able to finish it.

Just a reminder, all of this was my fault. I shouldn't have been late to class. I should have studied. I should have been fast enough and smart enough to not make those dumb mistakes and to finish the whole test on time. My comment to the teacher had mostly just been a subconscious request for generic sympathy, like when you tell someone "Of course it would rain on the one day I didn't bring my jacket" or "I stubbed my toe." You expect them to say "that's too bad," or "I'm sorry," or, in my case "better luck next time." You don't expect the person you're asking sympathy from to actually do anything about it, but my math teacher did.

He took me to his office after class and, after a brief, but friendly chat, he gave me a few extra minutes to complete the test. I told him more than once that he was being very generous and that I knew I deserved whatever grade I got. It was my fault that I didn't study and it was my fault that I was late. Had I studied and/or shown up on time, I would have had the 'extra' time that my teacher gave me. It was a really kind gesture, which I shouldn't have needed and certainly didn't deserve.

That wasn't the only undeserved miracle I received that day. I forgot a few papers from home that I thought I needed, so after completing the test, I biked home to get them, and to shave. I should have had the papers already, and I should have shaved that morning, but I miraculously had time to get home and take care of those things. This was miraculous because, when I got home, I noticed that my back tire had a leak, and though I carry the tools I need to repair a tire in my backpack while I'm biking, it's hard to carry a pool of standing water in which to find the leak you need to patch. Fortunately, I was able to create one at home and repair my flat in record time.

With my bike once again in working condition, I raced back to the school so I could get to my tutoring job on time. On the way, in my haste, I almost "tripped" and fell off my bike when I hit a bump, but I was miraculously spared that fate and I managed to get to work quickly and in one piece.

The whole day, I kept seeing little miracles, things working out for me better than they should have, and I kept thinking to myself that I didn't deserve it. God blesses me, and probably a lot of other people also, a lot more than we deserve, because He loves us. We can't pay Him back any more than I could adequately thank my Math teacher for his extra extension of human kindness. But we can express our thanks to God by doing the things that He asks of us, by keeping his commandments and showing kindness to each other. It's the least we can do, but at least it's something.

I think we all get blessings we don't deserve from time to time. Maybe we should pay that forward and be kind to others, even if they don't deserve it. Something like "Do unto others what God has done unto you." I know that's not how the golden rule really goes, but I think this one is an improvement. We should follow God's example in as many ways as possible, including by showing others my kindness than they may deserve.

The Irony of the Priorities of Our Desires

In my desire to blog about the Sacrament, I skipped over a Conference talk that I'd like to get back to now. In a talk titled Which Way Do You Face?, Elder Lynn G. Robbins of the Presidency of the Seventy said, "Trying to please others before pleasing God is inverting the first and second great commandments," which are first to "love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind," and second to "love thy neighbour as thyself" (Matt 22: 37, 39). Pleasing God should be among our top priorities, if not the top priority. Pleasing anyone else, even ourselves, should come second to that.

Elder Robbins spoke of some who feared men more than God. Today, I'd like to blog about the temptation and peril of loving ourselves more than God. The temptation is very present and alluring. We want to do what we want to do, not what God wants us to do. We want what we want, not what God wants for us. This is foolish because what God wants for us, what He's offering us, is greater than anything we can imagine or ever hope to obtain by ourselves. What God wants us to do is a wiser course of action and will lead to greater happiness than any path we might find or follow by following our own plans or whims. God can see the future, and He wants our future to be glorious. To that end, He has told us what to do to reach that glorious future. How foolish we would be to desire anything else!

How foolish we are for desiring other things. We don't quite have the vision and foresight God has. We can't see the end from the beginning like He can. We only see the roads that are in front of us. One of them looks fun, but leads nowhere. One of them looks promising, but really isn't. And one of them looks hard and steep, with no end in sight, and this is the road God wants us to follow. Human nature would have us choose either of the first two roads. A foolish man would chart his own course and follow his own plan rather than God's. An even more foolish one would follow the crowd, take the path of least resistance, and try to have a good time... until Judgement day. The only wise course of action for those of us who know God's will for us is to abandon our own schemes and instead follow the path that God has laid out for us. It won't be what we want to do, and it probably won't get us what we think we want, but it'll get us something better than we ever dreamed of obtaining, and in the end, we'll be glad we did it.

Putting God before ourselves is difficult but ironically more rewarding than putting ourselves before Him. Putting ourselves first, we might make more money or have more fun, but it won't last. Putting God first ensures that we'll "lay up for [ourselves] treasures in heaven" that will allow us to experience eternal joy forever. Putting God's desires before our own may seem counter-intuitive, but it's actually the best thing we could possibly do for ourselves. So, in a sense, putting God first means putting ourselves first, because God wants what's best for us, and putting our own desires first isn't really something that we actually want to do.

The Sacrament - A Sacred Reminder

A few days ago, I blogged about the Sacrament and about a bowl of bread cereal. I talked about how the cereal reminded me of the Sacrament, which is a reminder of Jesus Christ, but I also said that I didn't want to link the Sacrament, a sacred ordinance, to a mundane and trivial bowl of cereal. Reminders like the Sacrament should be repeated as frequently as necessary to help us remember, but things which are sacred, like the Sacrament, should be kept sacred, not made trivial or common.

The main difference between the Sacrament and my usual breakfast cereal (besides the containers in which they're put, the temperature of the water, and the milk, sugar, and hot cocoa mix I mix into my breakfast), is that the Sacrament is blessed with sacred, Sacramental prayers, and my cereal is not. Of course, I pray for my breakfast, too, just as I pray for my other meals, but I don't use the Sacramental prayers to do so! The only times I utter the words of those prayers are when I'm blessing the Sacrament, or when I read them from the scriptures or a gospel manual. Those prayers are sacred, so we keep them sacred by not saying them any more frequently than it's respectful to do so. Those sacred, Sacramental prayers are what turn ordinary bread and water into the sacred Sacrament.

Though the initial substances are much the same, just regular store-bought bread and normal tap water, the Sacrament is holy, and my cereal is not. The Sacrament is blessed with sacred prayers, and my cereal is not. The Sacrament is the Sacrament, and my cereal is not. I don't need to worry about cheapening the Sacrament with my breakfast cereal because my cereal is not the Sacrament.

It is, however, a reminder of the Sacrament, which in turn reminds me of Jesus Christ whom I, in the sacred, Sacramental prayers, promised to always remember. As I've said before, "If my breakfast raises my thoughts to the subject of Jesus Christ, that's a good thing." We're supposed to remember Christ always, which may be the reason why all things testify of Him, even my morning breakfast. It doesn't have to be disrespectful, and bread and water don't have to be sacred to remind us of things that are. My breakfast can perform one of the main functions of the Sacrament, serving as a reminder of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, without diminishing the value of Christ, the Atonement, or the actual Sacrament. My cereal is just a regular reminder. The Sacrament is a sacred one.

Tips for Improving Prayers

I promise I'll get back to General Conference eventually. I even tried to lead into it with that blog post about breakfast and the Sacrament, thinking and hoping that I'd have time to link my thoughts together on Saturday or Sunday. But as it turned out, I didn't have time to do that, and now I think I've missed my moment. Besides, I have something else on my mind right now.

My prayers, at least my personal prayers, have improved recently, and I'd like to consider how and why. For one thing, I'm praying more honestly now than I was previously. I used to start almost all of my prayers with "We/I thank Thee for this day," and gratitude is certainly a good attitude to have, especially when praying, but I had repeated the phrase so often that it had become meaningless to me. It was just part of the script. It was the line that I said after saying "Dear Heavenly Father." It became a vain repetition.

To correct that, I've started using variations of that phrase, or even that phrase again, but I say it one word at a time now, and I think about whether I actually mean what I'm saying. It may still be a repetition, or something close to it, but the words aren't vain when I really mean them.

I've also started seeing God and I as a partnership, rather than allowing myself to be totally dependent on Him. When I pray for Him to help me be righteous and resist temptation, I acknowledge, at least internally, that it's my responsibility, too. In fact, it's my responsibility more than it is His, and I'm owning up to that. I just want His help, and all the help I really need (unless I'm weaker than I think) is a warning when I face temptation and don't realize it. Satan is very subtle. So subtle sometimes that I don't even notice that he's pulling my strings. As long as God points those moments out to me, and I pray for strength immediately during those moments, I don't have as much trouble pulling free. Hmm, I guess I am relying on God's strength, too, as well as His wisdom. Oh, well. It's more wise than relying on mine.

Another way my prayers have improved is by saying them more frequently. Not only am I praying any time I face temptation, I'm also praying earnestly at all the times that I'm supposed to, or at least more than I was before. I used to not really pray for my food, but now I use food as a reminder to pray, not just to ask God to bless the food, but to express other thoughts as well. I'm starting to think that maybe the reason we're asked to ask God to bless our food doesn't have so much to do with the dangers of eating unblessed food as it does with the benefits of praying at least as frequently as we eat. Theoretically, we should be praying all the time, but that's practically impossible. Developing the habit of praying just before we eat something ensures that we'll be praying at least several times per day, and that means we'll be connecting with God more frequently, and that means more blessings for us.

I'm glad my prayers are better now than they had been and I hope I keep up these good habits I've learned. I'm grateful that my prayers have been made more meaningful and frequent, and I hope that they stay that way.

It Still Stinks, But God Can Help

Right now, I think I have slightly more time than I had yesterday morning, but it's still nowhere near the amount of time I'd need to do what I need to do. I suppose that's part of becoming an adult - getting stuck with so many obligations that even though you're old enough to do whatever you want to do, you never have the time.

Satan likes to use that our business against us. He tries to convince us that we don't have time for spiritual things because we have so many other obligations to take care of, or that we're too tired after fulfilling our obligations to spend time studying the scriptures. Sometimes, he uses the stress of everyday life to upset us to the point where we emotionally cannot feel the Spirit.

The solution, I think, is prayer. We may not have much time for scripture study or Family Home Evening, but you can usually spare a few seconds to close your eyes (or leave them open, if you're driving) and say a quick prayer. That prayer will attract the Spirit, which will help soothe the stress of life, allowing us to be better able to make it through the day. And if we keep the Spirit with us, which is difficult, but doable, He may help us find the time for other Spiritual obligations, and He can certainly help us take care of our daily work so we can get it down faster and better, leaving us more time for spiritual things.

So, I'll pray for help. I pray for help in finding time to do everything I need to do so I can get it all done and still not be too tired to read my scriptures. And if I manage to read my scriptures despite the many other things I need to do, that might earn me a few brownie points with the Big Man, prompting Him to pull a few strings to help me get everything done.

Being Busy Stinks

Can't blog this morning. Too busy. Sorry.

Expect an actual blog post later today.

A Little Reminder

Two days ago, I posted something that's true again today:

For breakfast this morning, I'm having bread cereal, which is basically just bread torn into tiny pieces in a bowl with milk and sugar. I'm also having a glass of hot chocolate with it. As the first few steps of preparing my breakfast, I tore two slices of bread into tiny pieces and poured myself a glass of water. It's nice to get little reminders from time to time.

 The Sacrament itself is a "little" reminder of something much, much more significant than a bowl of breakfast cereal, and I wonder if it isn't disrespectful to connect the greatest event in the history of the Earth to an event so mundane as a plain, morning meal. At the same time, all things testify of Christ, including (apparently) a bowl of bread. If my breakfast raises my thoughts to the subject of Jesus Christ, that's a good thing, but if the ordinance that's supposed to remind me of the Atonement reminds me of bread cereal instead, that's terrible. The Sacrament is supposed to be a sacred experience. I don't want to to start to think of it as some common thing.

Christianity is Changing

As I was watching President Boyd K. Packer's talk, The Reason for Our Hope, the first thing that stood out to me was what he said about the Topical Guide's references to Jesus Christ.

18 pages, very fine print, single-spaced, listing references to the subject of “Jesus Christ.” It is one of the most comprehensive compilations of scriptural references on the subject of the Savior that has ever been assembled in the history of the world.

I had never thought that anything about the Topical Guide was very impressive, but this is. This also offers convincing evidence that we are, in fact, Christians (As if the name The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints didn't already give it away). Many of those who claim that we're not Christian argue that point because we use a book of scripture other than the Bible, but if any of them actually read the Book of Mormon, they'd notice how many times it refers to Jesus Christ, and if they read it carefully, they'd notice that nothing in the Book of Mormon contradicts anything taught in the Bible. Of course, there many be some differences, caused by translation errors and limitations, and our personal beliefs about the nature of Jesus may differ from theirs, but I don't think the differences are great enough for either of us to not be considered Christians.

I think that the defining characteristic of a Christian is the desire and effort to follow the example of Jesus Christ. If you try to develop Christlike attributes and maintain a Christlike attitude, then you are a Christian. In fact, I'm not sure whether you even need to believe in the existence and divinity of Jesus Christ to be a Christian, according to the way I see it. I think that a person who strives to develop Christlike attributes just for the benefit of mankind, even if he thinks that there is no afterlife, that Jesus Christ was a lunatic, and that all organized religions are scams, is still more of a Christian than someone who professes to follow Jesus Christ but really doesn't even try. Being a Christian has less to do with one's mind or mouth and more to do with one's heart. You can believe in Jesus and say you follow Him, but if His teachings aren't in your heart, then aren't you kind of missing the point? Jesus isn't just trying to save us, He's trying to change us. If you're not changing, then are you really a Christian?

Personally, I do believe in Jesus Christ and I say (not in person so much, but at least online) that I try to follow Him, but is that really true? Am I really trying to follow Him? Are his teachings changing my heart? It's a matter of self-reflection, one that I think we should all undertake from time to time. To quote a historical fiction book that I just finished reading at around 2am the other night, "It has seemed to me that each year one should pause to take stock of himself, to ask: Where am I going? What am I becoming? What do I wish to do and become?"

I wish to be and become a better Christian. That's going to take a lot of work to change my nature and a lot of grace to forgive me for it, but it's an ongoing process for all of us, made possible by the One who wants nothing more than for us to undergo the changes required to emulate Him. Christ grew from grace to grace, and so should we. We should try to follow His example in all things, and that means that we should never stop trying to change for the better until we become perfect. None of us are perfect, so none of us who consider ourselves Christians should stop striving for self-improvement. It's a long, hard path, but it's the path the Savior followed, and we've all pledged to follow Him. That, in my opinion, is what Christianity means - continually changing to become ever more like Jesus Christ.

In Case Anyone Asks

In April 1996, Janette Hales Beckham shared an embarrassing personal story about a time she told her neighbor that we have a living prophet.

I told her briefly about the Restoration, and I explained that the restored Church of Jesus Christ has a living prophet today. This really seemed to pique her interest, and she wanted to know what the prophet had said. As I started to tell her about the Doctrine and Covenants and modern revelation, she said, “But what has he said lately?” I told her about general conference and that the Church had a monthly publication with a message from the prophet. Then she got really interested. I was so embarrassed to admit that I hadn’t read the current message. She concluded our conversation by saying, “You mean you have a living prophet and you don’t know what he said?”

We can avoid that awkward situation (and as a bonus, receive heaven's blessings for following prophetic counsel) simply by remembering what the prophet said in General Conference and by trying to apply it.

Without looking at my notes, I remember one talk President Monson gave. It was in the Priesthood Session, and it spoke of the mighty battleship Bismarck which was undefeated and deemed unsinkable until a torpedo disabled its rudder and it spun around in circles for hours, if not days, until it was eventually sunk. President Monson related us to that battleship. As long as we steer a proper course, we're unbeatable, but if we allow our rudder to become disabled (repentance repairs rudders, in this analogy) or if we spin around in circles of our own choice, we'll become easy targets for the Adversary.

Looking at LDS.org and my notes now, I'm reminded that he gave another talk called Ponder the Path of Your Feet. I remember this talk, but I didn't remember that it was President Monson who gave it, mostly because I'm actually remembering a different talk in which another General Authority quoted Proverbs 4:26. He had spoken of the importance of taking time to get your bearings and making sure you're on the right path. Shortly afterward, President Monson reminded us that the right path to follow is that of the Savior. Jesus endured temptations and trials, just as we all do, but He prevailed. President Monson told us of the examples hat Jesus had set of obedience, service, and prayer. "As we look to Jesus as our Exemplar and as we follow in His footsteps, we can return safely to our Heavenly Father."

Taking the two talks together, President Monson taught us that Jesus Christ showed the way that we should follow Him, and as long as we don't deviate from that course, we will be unstoppable. Perhaps that's because, as we follow Jesus Christ, we'll be doing the work of the Lord, and while Satan certainly has the power to frustrate us, he does not have the power to thwart the work of God. I find that thought encouraging. I know that I'm not undefeatable, but I know that God is. As long as we're on the same side, we can't lose. Actually, He won't lose, regardless of whose side I'm on, but I won't lose as long as I'm on His side. The Savior's example is a hard one to follow, but it's the only one that leads to certain victory.

So, in case anybody asks you some time in the next six months, President Monson told us that if we follow the path marked by the Savior, Satan will be unable to stop us. That's good to know to avoid an embarrassing situation, but it's also good to know to help us confidently follow Jesus into Eternal Life.

Super, Human Abilities

This morning, I was asked what I would be dressing up as for Halloween. My costume, which I designed several months ago, would consist of a red T-shirt with yellow duct tape on it in the shape of a large letter "A" inside of a Superman-style, gem-shaped shield-thing. I'd also be wearing a yellow towel as a cape.

Some people believe that I spend too much of my time thinking about fantasy stuff, including magic and superheroes. I'll admit that I should probably spend more time in reality than I do. But in my defense, some magic and super-powers, especially many of my favorites, can be seen as being exaggerations of powers that many of us already have, and my thinking about super-powers inspires me to use my own powers for good.

Some super-powers admit to being exaggerations of standard, human abilities. These include super-strength, super-speed, and super-senses. The funny thing is that human beings are already pretty strong and fast, and we can become stronger and faster by exercising. And most of us already have decent senses, and we can sharpen our senses by paying attention to them. It's amazing how much you can hear when you listen carefully.

Some of the more supernatural super-powers involve travel, like flight or teleportation. While humans haven't invented teleportation yet, we have created flying machines in which we can travel all over the world in a matter of hours rather than spending months at sea. That's pretty fantastic compared to what we had a few centuries ago.

While we're on the subject of technology, two of the most popular superheroes aren't actually "super" at all. Neither Batman nor Iron Man have any super-powers beyond what their gadgets can do, but their gadgets enable them to do some incredible things. The same is true for us. Modern technology is amazing! With our gadgets, we can do all sorts of things, and one of the things technology is the best at is communication.

The best communication-related super-power I can think of is telepathy, which allows people to transmit their thoughts and possibly read the minds of others. We don't have actual telepathy, but through the internet, we can easily broadcast our thoughts out to all the world, if we want to. We don't have the ability to read minds, but we can read people's blogs and Facebook posts to get a look into their minds. And even in person, we can usually tell what other people are thinking (and more importantly, how they're feeling) by paying attention to their body language and facial expressions as we as by trying to see things from their point of view.

From there, super-powers get even more magical. Abilities like telekinesis, elemental control, and the ability to shoot energy beams from our hands or eyes might be fun to have, but we don't really need them. Considering the abilities we already have, we don't usually need any more powers than that. We are already super humans. We can already do incredible things. So the question is, do we? To quote a popular line from a super-hero movie, with great power comes great responsibility. We have great power, or at least some power. We have the responsibility to use our powers for good.

Personally, when I really think about it, I don't actually want super-powers. I have a hard enough time controlling the powers I already have. Certain super-powers would be really useful from time to time, but I don't want to stand out like superheroes tend to do, and I can barely handle my own responsibilities, so I'd rather not take on any more. We don't need super-powers. In fact, if we can't handle that kind of responsibility, we may need not to have them. God is going to judge us based on what we do with the gifts He has given us. The more He gives us, the more He expects us to do with them. We might be lucky that we don't have actual super-powers. For most of us, it might be enough of a responsibility to use the super, human abilities we already have.

New Memes

After each Conference over the last few years, it repeatedly astonishes me how quickly new Conference memes are created and new Conference quotes are shared. Eventually, I'm sure I'll get used to it, and I'll see a new Conference meme posted to Facebook as soon as the words have left the Prophet's mouth, but until that day, I'm going to marvel at and enjoy the speed with which new Conference memes are created. And to prove that there are, in fact, many new Conference memes already posted to Facebook, despite this being only the day after Conference concluded, I'd like to share at least a few of those new memes here.

Okay, maybe I shared a few more than a few, but when the quotes and images are this good, it's hard to narrow the list down to just a few favorites. We are very blessed to have Prophets and Apostles who share such inspiring messages with us, and we're also blessed by the talented individuals who attach those messages to beautiful pictures and distribute them to all the world. I love General Conference and I love General Conference memes. It's miraculous that we live in an age when such blessings can be obtained and shared so quickly.

Big Picture of Little Decisions

One thing I've picked up on this Conference so far is that little, daily decisions influence our eternal destiny. As someone (Elder Cook?) mentioned wheat and tares sown closely together, I thought of a garden, where you must regularly pull weeds and water flowers almost every day. Little acts may not seem like much, it may seem like the flowers grow so slowly, and the weeds come back every time, but because of your diligent efforts, each day the flowers grow a little, and each time, a few fewer weeds grow back. So keep at it. You're making better progress than you may think. And even if you're not making any progress at all, God sees how hard you're trying, and that counts for a lot with Him. Keep up your daily acts of righteousness and your daily attempts to be a better person. It may not seem to amount to much right now, but it'll all be worth it in the end.

Invitations to Conference

I just invited a bunch of random strangers on the internet to attend General Conference. All it took was posting a link like this one: https://www.lds.org/general-conference?lang=eng. I don't expect many people to accept, or even see, my invitation, but if even one person clicks on the link and gets something out of Conference, it'll be worth it.

I have a non-member friend that I thought about inviting to Conference, but I didn't. I didn't have the nerve. Next time I see her, I'm going to invite her to watch some of General Conference. Maybe I'll pick out a particular talk I think she'll like. Anyhow, I should invite her to watch and benefit from at least some part of General Conference.

It doesn't take much to invite people to Conference, just a little courage. If you can build up the courage, I invite you to reach out to a friend, a coworker, or even a stranger, and invite them to watch a little bit of General Conference. Watching it will bless their lives and inviting them will bless yours.

Paladins ≈ Knights - Overcomplication

Yesterday, I was trying to explain what a Paladin was to someone, and after spending several minutes describing their commitment to righteousness, their code of conduct, their skill at arms and horsemanship, and the divine power they get in return for their devotion, I was told by the person to whom I was explaining all this, "So, basically, they're kind of like knights."

At that moment, I found it astonishing that a concept that's so difficult for others to understand became very simple to them when put into terms they understood. I could easily spend an enormous amount of time explaining what a Paladin is, what he does, what he can do, and why I would want to be one, and people still probably wouldn't get it. But if I say that I want to be as chivalrous and valiant as a knight, suddenly everybody knows what I mean.

As it turns out, I've been overcomplicating this. I'll still consider myself more of a Paladin than a knight because I love medieval fantasy more than medieval history, and the divine magic that sets a Paladin apart from non-magical knights reminds me of the divine power we each can get for our righteousness, and I really need that "magical" power. But from now on, whenever I need to explain what a Paladin is, I'll just tell them that a Paladin is kind of like a knight.

Inspiring Lives

There's a quote floating around Facebook that says "Your life is your message to the world. Make sure it's inspiring." I'm not sure who, if anyone, would be inspired by the story of my life, but I hope that they'd at least find the main character relatable and likable.

Come to think of it, I can't think of anyone whose life really inspires me. There are people that inspire me and encourage me to be a better person, but I'm not sure if their life stories have anything to do with that, except that that's how they got to be the way they are. Our experiences mold us, and then we help to shape other people. It's kind of a strange domino effect, except that we have a greater influence on our own lives than I sometimes give us credit for.

Life isn't something that just happens to us. Our life story doesn't entirely determine who we are. Some people face hardship and give up, while others face it head-on and become strong. Some, blessed with ease, merely enjoy their own comfort, others reach out to others to share the blessings they have. Our experiences can make us better people or worse ones, and it's mostly up to us which occurs.

We may not be able to choose all the plot elements in the stories of our lives, but we can make major decisions about the main characters, and that alone can make a story inspiring. We don't have to go from rags to riches or from weakness to strength (though I'm sure we'd all like to). We can inspire others just by holding on. A positive attitude, a commitment to righteousness, or even just the courage to keep on living can be enough to inspire others to try to be as strong as we sometimes seem. And watching them try to be strong can, in turn, inspire us.

We choose the main characters of our stories. We can't always choose family, classmates, or coworkers, but you can have a strong influence on other main characters, and that includes ourselves, naturally, but also our friends. Stay close to people who inspire you, and odds are pretty good that you'll both improve together as you inspire each other to be your best selves. Your life can be an inspiring one, especially as you spend time with people that inspire you.

Open Book Quiz

I took three quizzes recently. For the first one, I relied on my memory and got a B. For the second one, I remembered that I could take notes, so I did and got an A, but I still missed a few questions. Just before the third quiz, I noticed that I was allowed to use the course materials as I took the quiz, so I answered every question I could by memory, then checked the materials for the answers to he other questions. That time, I got 100% on the quiz.

Life is an Open Book Quiz, and all of the answers are in the scriptures. We could, like many people, rely on our own wit and wisdom to get us through life, and we might get a passing grade that way. We could also employ study tips, like learning from students who seem to be doing well, and that will likely improve our grade. But whenever we get stuck on a question that we can't answer on our own or even with help from our peers, we can hit the books.

The principles of the gospel and many examples on how we can live them in various situations are found in the writings of the Apostles and Prophets. They can offer us guidance in making the difficult and important decisions in our lives. They can help us pass the test, but only if we study their words.

"Our Heavenly Father did not put us on earth to fail but to succeed gloriously" (Richard G. Scott, October 1989). The Prophets and Apostles can help us do that. Let us remember to learn from them, so we can have their wisdom with us as we take the tests of life.