Forgiveness in the Moment

Last night, Joe and I read Acts chapter 7, in which Stephen gives a long, but still greatly condensed, history of the Jewish nation, then is martyred. What stood out to me in this chapter, besides its length and a few other things, was something Stephen said at the very end. As Stephen was being stoned:

...he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep.
Acts 7: 60

I must have been tired last night when we read this, because I remember that the euphemism  at the end confused me for a moment. I also mistakenly thought that it was Saul, the "young man" to whom the martyrers had given their coats to hold, who had knelt down, said that prayer, then literally fell asleep (perhaps a supernatural sleep, like King Lamoni in the Book of Mormon experienced). But no, it was definitely Stephen, and in this case, "falling asleep" is a term they used in faith of the resurrection, in which Stephen would or will "wake up."

But falling asleep isn't the interesting part. What really stood out to me was that Stephen said "Lord, lay not this sin to their charge," as he was being stoned.

There are lots of bad was to die. Being burned or eaten alive are among my least favorites as they are both long and extremely painful. Being stoned seems like it would take a bit longer, but would be equally painful. But the part that really gets me about stoning is that it's always personal. Being burned to death or eaten alive might not be anybody's fault, but stoning doesn't happen by accident unless there's an avalanche, and that's definitely not the case here. Here, Stephen knew that there were people who were killing him that wanted him to die slowly and painfully, and they wanted it badly enough that they were willing to get their hands dirty and do the killing themselves.

I can imagine being mad at someone enough to wish they were dead. I can even imagine being so angry at someone that I though the deserved to die slowly and painfully, though that is a dangerously evil level of hatred. However, I can hardly imagine ever becoming so angry at someone that I lose my humanity entirely and decide to kill them myself. That level of evil is almost unthinkable. Yet, that's what happened to Stephen. And, even more remarkably, he forgave them.

As he was in terrible pain, suffering from serious bruises and possibly broken bones, and knowing that every single one of those wounds were inflicted willfully and intentionally by people whom he knew would not stop pelting him with rocks until he died, he got down on his knees and asked God to forgive the people who were in the act of murdering him.

I can imagine forgiving someone for killing me. I can even imagine forgiving someone who willfully killed me, but it'd take me longer to get to that point, especially if I knew that they willfully decided not only to kill me, but that I should die in a very slow and painful way. I might be able to forgive them for that eventually, but it'd be one of the hardest things I've ever done. In Acts chapter 7, Stephen demonstrates a level of Christianity that I think is virtually impossible to achieve - A level of Christianity that I've only seen (so far) in Stephen and in Jesus Himself. Stephen was able to forgive his murderers for killing him in a terribly evil and horrifically brutal way, even while they were in the act of killing him. It's no wonder that Stephen saw a vision of Jesus Christ in that moment. It's hard to be more Christ-like than that. What better way to enter heaven than by following Christ's example so perfectly?

Sometimes, people wrong us, and we're supposed to forgive them. Sometimes they wrong us by accident, sometimes they wrong us on purpose; it doesn't matter. We're supposed to forgive them. Usually, forgiving others is a hard thing to do, and it usually takes time for the wounds to heal before we're ready to forgive those who wronged us, but sometimes, certain individuals exercise a great deal of long-suffering and love by forgiving those who had wronged them recently. Jesus and Stephen each suffered terrible wrongs at the hands of their murderers, but even so, they were strong enough and good enough to forgive them.

I hope that we can follow their example by forgiving others a little bit more readily than we currently do, and that by doing so, we can find ourselves drawing spiritually, but hopefully not yet literally, closer to Christ.