Sunday, May 31, 2015

A Good Use for Birthdays

I recently watched the movie version of The Fault in Our Stars, which is based on a book by the same name. The story is about a young couple who meet at a support group meeting for people suffering from cancer. Toward the end of the story, one of the characters discovers that their cancer has advanced aggressively and that they are going to die very soon. As such, they arrange for their friends to speak at their funeral, and their friends hold a sort of pre-funeral for them before they die. It's a touching moment, but it's the kind of moment that I don't think happens often enough.

Elder L. Tom Perry passed away earlier today, and now LDS.org has a few articles dedicated to him and celebrating his life. I hope that he had a chance to read those article before he passed away, or have them read to him. I think everyone deserves to hear the nice things that people will say about them at their funerals.

Fortunately, my kind and thoughtful mother makes sure her children hear such things at least once per year. On their birthdays, Mom posts a Facebook status, sharing their strengths and positive traits. I'm grateful for that. Kind words lift spirits higher than expensive gifts do. And one of those, you can take with you; the other, you can't.

The bad news is that we often don't get to see our deaths, or the deaths of our loved ones, approaching far enough in advance for us to plan pre-funerals for each other. We could hold them regularly, just in case, but it would be morbid if we did. Instead, we should frequently, at least annually, say nice things about each other, and make sure our loved ones know how much they mean to us, not just so they'll have kind words to take to their graves, but that they'll have the kind of encouragement that makes life easier and more enjoyable.

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