"Lord, I Believe..."

I think it's about time to get back to General Conference. It's been a while since I last posted about a General Conference talk, and I only have one Session left. The trouble is, the next talk in line was given by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, an Apostle that I really like, and it's about a Bible story that someone I know really likes. I'm worried that I won't be able to do this talk justice, especially since I want to wrap up this blog post as quickly as possible so I can get some work done while it's still morning, and so I don't get too comfortable sitting at the computer. Maybe I should hold off on this talk until tomorrow. I'll have plenty of time to write about it then.

Perhaps a compromise is in order. Perhaps I'll set the stage in this blog post, sharing the story that Elder Holland shared, then tomorrow I'd add his observations and mine.

On one occasion Jesus came upon a group arguing vehemently with His disciples. When the Savior inquired as to the cause of this contention, the father of an afflicted child stepped forward, saying he had approached Jesus’s disciples for a blessing for his son, but they were not able to provide it. With the boy still gnashing his teeth, foaming from the mouth, and thrashing on the ground in front of them, the father appealed to Jesus with what must have been last-resort desperation in his voice: 

“If thou canst do any thing,” he said, “have compassion on us, and help us. 

“Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. 

“And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”

This account, minus the initial summary by Elder Holland, is found in Mark chapter 9, verses 22 through 24, and the way Elder Holland tells it, it's one of the most heart-wrenching story in all scripture.

This man’s initial conviction, by his own admission, is limited. But he has an urgent, emphatic desire in behalf of his only child. We are told that is good enough for a beginning. “Even if ye can no more than desire to believe,” Alma declares, “let this desire work in you, even until ye believe.”

Since Elder Dalin H. Oaks' talk of April 2011, I've thought occasionally on the importance and magnitude of desire. In his talk, Elder Oaks said:

Let us remember that desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions. In addition, it is our actions and our desires that cause us to become something, whether a true friend, a gifted teacher, or one who has qualified for eternal life.

This quote would have been helpful to remember when I was writing about my Identity Crisis. In that blog post, I eventually came to a similar conclusion, that our desires shape our identities and reflect what's in our hearts. In this case, the father's great desire for the welfare of his son reflected his deep love for his son.

With no other hope remaining, this father asserts what faith he has and pleads with the Savior of the world, “If thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us."

As Elder Holland points out a sentence later, "The plural pronoun us is obviously used intentionally." By this the father seems to be saying that both he and his son are suffering as a result of the child's condition. And the father asks for help from the Savior for both their sakes. With compassion, and using this opportunity to teach a lesson on faith, Jesus answers.

“If thou canst do any thing,” spoken by the father, comes back to him “If thou canst believe,” spoken by the Master.

Our prayers are often answered this way. It seems that God has an easier time getting our attention and getting us to think by repeating or rephrasing things that we have said. And Jesus Christ is famous for encouraging others to have faith.

“Straightway,” the scripture says—not slowly nor skeptically nor cynically but “straightway”—the father cries out in his unvarnished parental pain, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” In response to new and still partial faith, Jesus heals the boy, almost literally raising him from the dead, as Mark describes the incident.

In the video Finding Faith in Christ, this event, or a similar one, is shown with hesitation between the statements "Lord, I believe," and "Help thou mine unbelief," with a skeptical raise of the eyebrow from Christ in between. Whether there was any hesitation in that moment or not, there was the declaration of faith, then the admittance of a lack of faith. Elder Holland says a great deal about this later in his talk, so I won't go into that now, but I will say that our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ have a great deal of compassion for us, however imperfect we are. The father didn't have absolute faith that Jesus could heal his son, but he did have some faith (or at least some hope) that He could, and "in response to new and still partial faith, Jesus heal[ed] the boy."

We're not totally righteous all the time, but we're trying to be. Or at least we're trying to be mostly righteous most of the time. And I believe, or would like to believe, that God is willing to bless us for every little thing we do right; for every righteous action and every ounce of faith. We don't know anything about the father's actions, but we do know that he brought his child to Christ and His Disciples to be healed, and that, in itself, was an expression of faith. And for however little faith he had, he and his child were blessed. This tells me that Christ is merciful, and that He'll bless any effort and desire to follow Him.