Anger Doesn't

The second thought I'd like to share from Elder S. Mark Palmer's talk is less the logical opposite of the message I shared yesterday. Yesterday's message was that love encourages change. Today's message is that anger doesn't. As Elder Palmer put it, "No true teaching or learning will ever occur when done in frustration or anger, and hearts will not change where love is not present."

This is important to remember when teaching spiritual truths, whether you're at church, at home, going door to door, or wherever you may be. If you want to share the gospel in a way that others will receive it, you need to share it with love.

This principle holds true in secular matters as well. When teaching one's children, one would do well to calm, or at least hide, any feelings of frustration or anger one may have. Otherwise, the child may learn fear and anger rather than respect and wisdom.

Similarly, if we wish to have productive political conversations, we should use love rather than anger then as well. This may be difficult for many people who believe that their anger is justified and their enemies are unlovable, but Jesus Christ has counselled us to love and forgive everyone and has warned us that all anger is sinful. Besides, political arguments aren't productive. You may "win" the argument, but you won't win anyone over to your side of the argument unless you respect them and their thoughts and feelings, or at least pretend to. Remember: "hearts will not change where love is not present."

Sorry for getting political. I just had to get that off my chest.

You probably recall that we have been counselled to "Reprov[e] betimes with sharpness" (D&C 121:43), and that may seem to contradict the message that Elder Palmer has shared, but there is more than one way for reproof to be sharp.

"Sharpness" could mean "harshness," but I don't think that's the way the Lord meant it. I think that the Lord meant "with precision." With sharp reproof, we can cut away the bad behavior while leaving in everything that is good. Years ago, I blogged about "The Sword of the Spirit," at which time I said much the same thing.

Also, bear in mind that D&C 121:43 goes on to say "and then show[] forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy."

Using anger is not the best way to encourage correction. It isn't even a good way, especially in that it doesn't often work and sometimes even has the opposite of the desired effect. Instead of using anger to get our point across, we should use reason, sharp reproof "when moved upon by the Holy Ghost," and as large a measure as we can muster of sincere, Christlike love.