Picking Up the Slack

This afternoon, my mom shared a lesson about family responsibilities. As it appears in the manual, the lesson is all about the individual responsibilities of fathers, mothers, and children, but one important fact that the manual touches on lightly, if at all, is that not all families have fathers, mothers, and children. Some families have one or more family members missing, or not fulfilling their responsibilities. In those cases, other family members are asked to pick up the slack.

My parents have been divorced for years. Since the divorce, and even before, my mother has had to take on some roles that typically fall to the father, such as leading in family prayer and scripture study. For as long as I can remember, my mom has always been faithful at that, as well as her maternal responsibilities. Since the divorce, Mom has had to take on another of the father's roles: that of the provider. This has been difficult for her, and it often leaves her drained.

I tell you this partly to highlight how awesome my mother is, partly to warn of the consequences of breaking up a family, and partly to lead up to one more paternal responsibility: holding Family Home Evenings.

This has been a weak spot in our family since I was very little, partly because the person whose responsibility it was never accepted that responsibility, and partly because the person whose responsibility it became already had enough on her plate. But as I looked over this lesson, I was reminded that a child's responsibility is to love and support his or her parents. My sister did that last week (and/or the week before; my memory's not that great) by leading us in Family Home Evening. She rallied us together, made assignments, and made sure we had a Family Home Evening, and it went really well.

Through her example and through this lesson, I came to the realization that holding Family Home Evening is as much my responsibility as anyone else's, and I should support my family by doing my part to make sure that it happens and that it's not just another night of the week. So, tomorrow (and hopefully each week thereafter), I'm going to try to make sure I have a spiritual thought to share, that I bring a positive attitude to the game table, and that I'm willing to dish up ice cream and wash the bowls afterwards.

My mom has been amazing at fulfilling all of her family responsibilities and then some. Not having a supportive marital partner has meant that she has had to accept many responsibilities that, in a perfect world, should never have been hers to bear. But this doesn't mean that all of Dad's responsibilities automatically fall to Mom. We all need to help pick up the slack. The responsibility of holding Family Home Evenings shouldn't fall on Mom's shoulders alone; my brother and sister and I should help to carry that load. Holding Family Home Evenings is not her responsibility. It's ours.