I've said before on my blog that "You are the kind of person who does the things you do." This means that if you paint, then you are the kind of person who paints, a painter. If you dance, you are the kind of person who dances, a dancer. If you run games of D&D, then you are the kind of person who runs games of D&D, a DM. Our identities are based, at least in part, on our behavior. If that's true, that means our identities are changeable - at least as changeable as our behavior.
For example, say that I smoked. If I smoked, then I would be the kind of person who smokes, a smoker. Yet, no one is born a smoker, and many of the people who become smokers eventually quit and stop being smokers. Being a smoker is not a permanent part of anyone's central identity. The trait of being a smoker is as changeable as the habit of smoking is. When you quit smoking, you stop being a smoker.
Of course, that's easier said than done, and that might not even be true with all habits. A drinker can, with a considerable amount of effort, stop drinking and thus stop being a drinker, but they may still be an alcoholic. Even after quitting, the ex-drinker may have a vulnerability that further exposure to alcohol would exploit. That would be a more lasting part of their identity, still not permanent, but longer-lasting than even a deeply-ingrained habit.
Still, for many aspects of our identities, we can change them as easily as we change our behavior. We can change some parts of who we are as easily as we can change what we do. If a person grows tired of being a painter, they can stop being a painter when they stop painting. I don't know why a person would want to stop being a painter, but that's just an example. Any part of our identities that are based on our actions or habits can be changed as easily as our actions and habits themselves can.
If we are what we do, and if we want to change who we are, we can start by changing what we do.
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