No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience, is wasted. It ministers to our education to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God. And it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation that we gain the education that we came here to acquire.
This definition of shrinking casts an interesting light on a scripture about the Atonement.
For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all... Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit - and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink - Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men. - D&C 19: 16, 18-19
Elder Bednar said:
The Savior did not shrink in Gethsemane or on Golgotha. Elder Maxwell also did not shrink... Now, I believe most of us would likely expect a man with the spiritual capacity, experience and stature of Elder Maxwell to face serious illness and death with an understanding of God's Plan of Happiness, with an assurance and with grace and with dignity, and he surely did, but my purpose today is to bear witness that such blessings are not reserved exclusively for General Authorities, or for a few select members of the church.
Elder Bednar then shared a story of a young couple who, just after their marriage, learned that the husband had bone cancer. Troubling times and painful treatments followed. Prior to a surgery to remove part of the cancer, the man asked Elder Bednar for a Priesthood Blessing. Before giving the blessing, Elder Bednar felt inspired to ask a question that he had never asked before, "Do you have the faith not to be healed?"
The question was that if the Lord called you home, rather than give you the blessing you ask for, will you go willingly? Elder Bednar explains that we sometimes impatiently demand blessings that we feel we need and deserve, especially to relieve suffering that we do not deserve to suffer. But having strong faith in the Savior means submissively accepting His will and timing in our lives. Even if it means suffering longer than we'd like or dying earlier than we'd like.
I don't know if the man eventually died of cancer or if he was healed. Elder Bednar didn't say. That wasn't the point of his message. His message was that sometimes we need to have experiences, even painful, frightening experiences, to bring us closer to God. God knows this, so He sometimes allows bad things to happen to good people. While these experiences may shake someone's faith in God, we can use them to test and prove our faith in Him. We need to have faith, not that God will heal us and cause all our suffering to end, but that He'll do what's best for us and consecrate our afflictions for our good.
I have faith that God knows what's best for us, but I also feel less sure of that when I feel pain. I know that God must be trying to teach me something during those times, but I can't help thinking, "Isn't there another way?" If God asked me to willingly drink the bitter cup, I would probably shrink. I don't have that much faith yet. But I know that God intends me to gain it. I know that there will be suffering in my future, and the afflictions will be more painful than anything I've felt so far. I hope I'll have grown up a little by then. I hope by then my trust in God will be stronger. I hope that I'll be able to say "Not my will but thine be done."
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