Self-Deprecation

In each of the three new Apostles' talks, the speaker falls victim to a vice from which I also suffer: self-deprecation. Elder Rasband did it the least, saying mostly only that he felt "amazed" and "overwhelmed." The other two said that they were, as Elder Renlund put it, "evidence to the truthfulness of the Lord’s statement early in this dispensation: 'That the fulness of my gospel might be proclaimed by the weak and the simple unto the ends of the world.'"

I call self-deprecation a vice in part because, as I wrote last night, we have no right to judge anyone, including ourselves, and partly because it can lead to a much bigger problem. Self-deprecation can lead to one feeling like they're worthless, but we all know that that isn't true. None of us are worthless. The worth of souls is great in the sight of God, and we all have or are souls, so each of us has great worth in the sight of God. Yet, when we allow ourselves to fall victim to self-deprecation, we lower our self-esteem and take one step closer to thinking that we have absolutely no value at all.

Granted, most people who self-deprecate don't actually think they're worthless (which is good, because they're not), but they do undercut their perception of their value, and this puts them at odds with their Heavenly Father, who sees great value in each of us. The way I've heard it, self-deprecation is not an aspect of humility, but of pride. President Deiter F. Uchtdorf said that:

Humility does not mean convincing ourselves that we are worthless, meaningless, or of little value. Nor does it mean denying or withholding the talents God has given us. We don’t discover humility by thinking less of ourselves; we discover humility by thinking less about ourselves.

Furthermore, President Ezra Taft Benson said that a central feature of pride is enmity, or opposition, especially to God. Those who self-deprecate often exercise pride to do so, since God tells us that we have great value, but we tell ourselves that we don't.

Now, by saying all this, I don't mean to insult or ridicule anyone for thinking little of themselves. That would be counter-productive. Nor do I mean to say that the honest admittance of weakness isn't wise. What I do mean to say is that I don't think God wants any of us to beat ourselves up or put ourselves down. That doesn't mean that you're a bad person if you do that; that just means that you've got something to work on. And having and admitting a fault, like the habit of self-deprecation, isn't a bad thing, either. You just have to address the weakness and strive to overcome it rather than letting it define you and spoil your self-esteem.

I am fully convinced that God loves you and thinks you're a wonderful person. I also believe that He thinks you're fully capable, or at least capable of becoming capable, of everything He asks you to do. Just like the three newest members of the Quorum of the Twelve, we may sometimes feel weak and simple, but that doesn't mean that we are weak and simple, and even if we are, that doesn't mean that we're bound to stay that way. We have infinite potential, and we're each already living up to some of it. So, next time I'm tempted to think badly of myself, I'm going to ask God what He thinks of me and how He thinks I'm doing, and I'll try to be humble enough to accept His assessment, even if His opinion of me is much higher than mine.