Quiet Fun with Family

I'm normally kinda anti-social. I find people tiring, and I dislike the amount of noise people tend to make. But tonight was different. Tonight, I just spent the evening with members of my household. We played a board game and a few rounds of UNO, we had family prayer and scripture study, and we watched my brother play a video game I introduced him to. It was mostly just a fun, chill, quiet evening, and I really enjoyed it.

Normally, I get overwhelmed with too many people making too much noise, but this small, quiet evening with a handful of family members was a very pleasant evening for me.

Grow Through What You Go Through

I had an opportunity to spend some time with my slightly-extended family at a park this evening. It was a great time, with lots of good food and fun playing together. While we were playing, I noticed that one of my nieces was wearing a shirt that said something like "Grow through what you go through," and I thought that was a good message, especially for the young.

We all have growing up to do, and we all have life experiences that can help us do it. The trick is to actually use our experiences to help us grow, rather than just experiencing them. We need to look for the lessons we can learn from our experiences, and we need to use our experiences to help us practice Christlike attributes. These skills are especially useful for younger people, since they have the most growing to do and the most experiences ahead of them, but the skills are also useful for the rest of us. As long as we have experiences ahead of us, we would do well to learn how to use them to grow.

Some say that our experiences, especially our negative ones, are our greatest teachers. I'm not sure I fully agree with that, but I do think that, as long as we need to go through suffering, we might as well use it to help us grow.

Sharing Adventure

One of the things I love most about the games I play is the ability to share adventures with my friends. Case in point, I played a single-player game and got my brother interested in it as well, and now I get to watch him experience the same adventure I went on, but in his own way. I get to celebrate his accomplishments with him, marvel at his ability to find secrets far more easily than I ever did, and offer him advice when it's needed and/or especially helpful. We got to laugh together when he tossed a fire bomb in a pool of water, and it went out instead of exploding, and we got to work out some of the details of the interactions of the magic items. My brother is having fun, and I'm having fun with him.

I really like this aspect of the games I play. I like being able to share thrilling experiences with my friends through games. And it doesn't even have to be through just games. Our lives themselves can be adventures. And one of the best parts of these adventures is being able to share them with others.

Anticipating Unanticipated Costs

I am frequently reminded of the parable of the man planning to build a tower. In Luke 14:28, we read "For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?" This can be tricky. People are not typically perfectly accurate when it comes to predicting the future, including when it comes to predicting future costs. Often, unanticipated expenses arise, leading to the project costing more than one had originally anticipated. Yet, I suppose we can plan for that, too. We may not know what additional expenses may arise, but we can anticipate that unanticipated expenses will arise, and we can set aside some funds to cover the unanticipated costs. For example, if we think that building a tower would cost $1000, we could budget in an additional $200, to cover the costs we didn't predict.

Naturally, this advice is not merely financial. We can budget our time and energy in similar ways. For example, there are items on my weekly schedule that take about 45 minutes, but I allot them an hour each on my schedule, in case setbacks occur. This gives me some amount of flexibility with my time, rather than leaving me vulnerable to being late if anything takes slightly longer than expected. Similarly, we can budget our energy in regards to upcoming projects and errands. It's difficult to estimate how much we can do and how much juice we'll have left after we've done it, but if we plan projects that are well within our abilities, and/or if we plan more breaks than we think we'll need, we can hopefully avoid the risk of running out of steam before the project is done.

Granted, even when we account for issues we didn't anticipate, we can sometimes be caught underprepared. It's difficult to anticipate how far our unanticipated setbacks will set us back. We might budget $1200 for a tower that we think will only cost $1000, but if it actually ends up costing $1500, we might still be in trouble. Still, it's good to try to anticipate unanticipated costs, so we can reduce the likelihood of running into that kind of trouble, and we can reduce the amount of trouble we'll find ourselves in. It's less bad to be $300 over budget than to be $500 over budget, especially since it can also be calculated as being 25% over budget as opposed to 50% over budget. And when it comes to time and energy, one can burn the midnight oil when one has to, so long as one doesn't burn too much of it too often. We can't take the time we need to rest to regain our energy when we are instead spending that time and energy biting off more than we can chew.

So, when you anticipate anything that'll take up some of your resources, try to anticipate it taking up more of those resources than you think it actually will. Likely, either you'll be blissfully underbudget, with your original estimates having been close to correct, or you'll be glad you planned ahead enough to anticipate the unanticipated costs that inevitably unexpectedly came up.

What I Want to Remember About Today

I just saw a Facebook post that said "There is such a difference between asking 'What did you do today?' versus 'What do you want to remember about today?'," and that thought hit me pretty hard. For me, the answer to the first question is "Not Much," but the answer to the second question is far more interesting.

I want to remember that song that I heard for the first time and share with a friend whom I thought might also like to hear it.

I want to remember that time a met offense with humility and, in doing so, strengthened a bond that otherwise might have weakened.

I want to remember that I helped people about as well as I could have, even when I didn't feel like doing so.

I want to remember (and laugh at the comedy of errors) that I took four trains and a bus to get home this evening, intentionally walking two blocks in the wrong direction in the company of a stranger, all in a vain attempt to avoid a stopped train and the complications caused thereby, when I could have simplified my route home significantly (and probably gotten home sooner), simply by sitting down somewhere and practicing patience.

I want to remember that I got winded jogging a short distance across campus (these aren't chronological, by the way) and that I should probably put in some work on the treadmills at the Fitness Center, not just on the strength-training workout machines (that, or I could jog more on my own time, like instead of walking from one place to another, because I can do that anywhere). 

I want to remember a chance encounter I had almost forgotten until now. I saw the man with the lunchbox again, the one who risked missing the bus one day to make sure his kid would have a lunch.

I want to remember wanting to tell the man that he was a good man and a good father, but not being able to, because he's deaf, and I can't sign.

I want to remember a brand new idea I just had: carrying paper. I could have written him a note, if I had thought of it and if I had had the means.

I want to remember to write him a note tomorrow and save it for the next time I see him at the bus stop.

So, yeah, no, I didn't do much today, but as I think back on it, there's a lot I want to remember from it.

Trust Issues

It bothers me that God doesn't always explain Himself. I don't like taking "because I said so" as an answer, because that's not a good way to learn. I've had this issue since back when I took my Algebra class and was taught to use formulas for which I wasn't prepared to learn the proofs. Sometimes, we can't wrap our heads around how something works, but we're still expected to trust that it works and act on that information. I don't like doing that. For me, it's not enough to know that there is a rule; I also want to know why that rule exists.

Yet, I know that I can't always get an explanation. God's ability to explain things is limited by my inability to understand them. It'd be like me trying to explain something to a dog. Sure, I may understand something, but I can't necessarily make a dog understand it. Given that God is vastly more intelligent than we are, it may be that God is capable of understanding things that we cannot yet understand, even if God Himself were to try to explain them to us. Instead, He asks us to trust Him until we become intelligent enough to understand that which we cannot understand now.

This, too, is difficult for me. I find it difficult to trust God when every avenue I have for interacting with Him is so flawed. The people who claim to speak for Him could be lying and/or mistaken. The words those people wrote in scripture could be equally false. Even my own thoughts and feelings could be just that: my own thoughts and feelings, or worse, illusions sent by some cunning deceiver to deliberately mislead me. I can't shake the feeling that everything I think I know about God could be wrong, and I have no idea how I could know for sure. How can I trust someone when I can't fully trust any of the information I have about them?

I suppose my only recourse is to pray, to try to discern truth from falsehood for myself, and hope to God that I'm not being misled. As for the rules, I'm going to try to use my judgement there, too, including my judgement about whose judgement I can trust. Some people are wise, and others are foolish. Some people are honest, and others are liars. I'm going to do my best to figure out who's who and to make wise decisions from there. Will I make mistakes along the way? Absolutely. But as far as I've been told, mistakes were part of the plan anyway. This is part of how we learn. I will gain wisdom however I can, including through my own experience, and maybe one day I'll learn that I should have trusted God all along.

Scare Tactics

So, it's almost Halloween time, so I figured that tonight would be an appropriate time to ask, "Does God really want us to fear Him?" Naturally, I know that "fearing God" and being a "God-fearing people" doesn't actually mean being afraid of Him, but that still doesn't answer the question. Does God want us to be afraid of Him?

Of course, one would hope not. I don't think any good parent should try to motivate their children through fear. Yet, certain descriptions of hell and of the "great and dreadful day of the Lord" seem intent on causing at least apprehension, if not fear. There are times when I think that God wants to literally scare the hell out of us, or at least scare us away from hell.

Yet there is, perhaps, some merit to this tactic. Frightening a person is more humane than actually punishing them. If people can be scared into choosing to repent, then that's a step in the right direction, even if the step was made with less than stellar motivation. Perhaps God tries to scare us with (potentially exaggerated) descriptions of hell so we don't continue down the path toward it and find out how bad it is for ourselves. So, as unsavory intimidation is as a method of motivation, perhaps God uses it to help us avoid a fate far worse than getting scared.

I'd prefer it if God didn't use scare tactics, but if they help keep people on the strait and narrow path, perhaps it's worth it. Scaring people doesn't seem like a good thing to do, but if the choice is between scaring them and letting them suffer for eternity, the choice seems pretty clear.

Build Your Own Life

Hank R. Smith once said, "Remember my friends, you are the creative force in your life. If you want something to happen, YOU have to make it happen. Don't wait for someone or something to do it for you. Pray like it all depends on God, then work like it all depends on you."

He might have been quoting someone when he said that last part, but the point still stands. We can hope and pray all we want, but God leaves a lot of our lives up to us. We choose what kind of life we want to have by choosing how we live it. If we choose to live well, we will have good lives, and if we choose to live poorly, our lives won't be as good. Luck and blessings (or the lacks thereof) only modify how hard or how easy it is for us to create the life we want. The decision and the effort are ultimately up to us.

I find this simultaneously encouraging and disheartening. It's encouraging because it means I can build whatever life I want for myself. It's disheartening because it means I have a lot of work ahead of me. It's like a vacant lot with a sign that reads "Build to Suit." I have a lot of potential, but it's up to me to realize that potential. I can build whatever kind of life I want, but I have to build it with my own two hands and with the help of those who are willing to help me. It's thrilling, but I know it'll also be exhausting. I hope it'll be worth it in the end.

Belief in Eternity

I put this blog post off too long. At this point, it's going to be late, lousy, or both. Well, better late than never. Thankfully, we believe in eternity. We believe that, even after "the end," there's still time. That which has gone wrong can be set right in time, and there is always more time.

So, I'm not worried. No matter how far I am from my goal, I've got time to get there. No matter how wrong things are, there'll always be time to set it right. Eternity is a long time, which is lucky for us, since we have a lot of learning and growing to do. Growth takes time, but with an eternity worth of time, we can make an infinite amount of growth.

I'm grateful for my knowledge of and belief in eternity. I'm glad we know that this life isn't all there is. Wisdom comes with experience, and experience takes time. But just imagine how wise we can all become if we continue growing wiser throughout eternity.

"My No-Consequences Power Fantasy"

A Reddit (I think) user with the username "writing-prompt-s" once posed the question, " 'In a game with no consequences, why are you still playing the "Good" side?'," to which "deflare" responded, "Because my no-consequences power fantasy is being able to help everyone."

I concur with "deflare." I wish I had the time, energy, attitude, and ability to help everyone. I regret that I am sometimes to busy, tired, grumpy, or incompetent to help. It'd be nice to be able to help more people more often and to keep a smile on my face while I did it. Unfortunately, I'm not that good.

Still, I am fairly good, and I have the power to get better. I can become more cheerful, more capable, and more diligent, especially if I actively work toward those goals. I used to do that kind of goal-planning all the time, but I got discouraged due to a lack of progress. But this goal seems much more achievable. I can become (even) better at helping people, and I'll be (even) more happy with myself when I do.

Good Memories and Good Lessons

While looking for more wise sayings to share, I came across a quote attributed (apparently wrongfully) to the same wise man from my last blog post:

"Good times become good memories, and bad times become good lessons."

I don't know who actually said this, but it's a good message. It's nice to know that, however life turns out, some good can come of it. If times are bad, you probably won't enjoy them, but at least you might learn something from them, and if times are good, you probably won't learn much from them, but at least you'll have a good time and be left with some good memories. And really, that's why we're here, isn't it? To have a good, informative, formative, and hopefully enjoyable experience. Our individual experiences, good and bad, are the events that make that possible.

I'm thankful for the times I've had, both good and bad, and for the memories and lessons I've gained from them. In many ways, my experiences have made me who I am today, and in a literal way, those experiences have formed basically my entire life. We experience life through the good and bad times it offers, and both good and bad times have blessings to offer us.

Life Happens

When confronted with the idea of his nephew not wanting to make a life in a particular city, a wise man once said "Life happens wherever you are, whether you make it or not." This is good to remember, since it can represent several good and wise interpretations.

One good interpretation is the uplifting reminder to look on the bright side. Wherever we are, there is life, kindness, beauty, goodness, happiness, and any other trait we choose to bring with us. There can be light and joy in even the saddest and darkest places, if we bring light and joy with us and/or know how to look for it.

Another wise interpretation is the sobering reminder that time is always passing. Our lives will progress, and ultimately end, whether we make anything of them or not. Regardless of what we do, the clock keeps ticking. Life happens, and will continue to happen, until it reaches its end. This is all the more reason to make the most of our lives while we can. The time will be spent, regardless. It's best to spend our lives doing something worthwhile.

I'm sure there are other good and wise interpretations of this message. Feel free to share your own. In the meantime, I intend to try to make good use of my life and the time that I have been given.

A Sin of Inaction

Today, I missed an opportunity to do good. I was at a KFC, eating lunch, and a lady came up to the counter. She asked about job applications, and then she asked about the price of a single piece of chicken. Upon being told the price, she seemed surprised and disappointed, and then she left.

I almost stopped her. She was clearly in some sort of need. Perhaps she wasn't desperate, but she certainly seemed like she could use a hand and/or a free meal. I should have bought her some chicken, or at least should have offered to.

I wonder how this inaction on my part will be measured, morally. It probably wasn't an evil act, if for no other reason than the fact that it was no act at all. Still, that's not an excuse. Sins of omission are still sins. Is that what this was? It would have been good for me to offer help. Was it bad of me not to?

I don't know if my inaction was morally evil, but it was almost certainly "bad," if only in that it was a missed opportunity to do good. I'll try to do better next time, in that I'll try to do something at all. 

Peaceful, Political Progress

In my Political Ideologies class, we're currently covering Karl Marx and many of those who followed after him. Marx thought that, in order to overthrow capitalism and free the proletariat from the oppression of the bourgeoisie, there would need to be some kind of revolution, potentially a violent one, resulting in the proletariat taking over the government. Some of the political thinkers who followed after Marx disagreed, believing that positive change could be made through peaceful political reforms, including just voting for the kinds of changes you want to have made. Fortunately, these revisionists seem to have been right. Conditions have improved for most people, partly because of laws that were passed and programs that were established to help those who needed help the most. Lives have been improved, and no lives had to be lost in the fight to make that possible.

I'm grateful that I live in a country where progress can be made peacefully, politically, and not necessarily through violent revolutions. I'm glad that lives are getting better and that suffering is diminishing. I'm grateful for the hope that we can justifiably have that life will be even better future generations than it has been for us. And I'm especially grateful that I didn't have to physically fight anyone to help make this possible. I'm glad we can vote to improve this country peacefully, so that no one has to overthrow the government in order to make change.

I'm grateful that I live in a country that is so blessed that conditions can be good and get even better over time. Of course, it's good to have the option to revolt when revolution is necessary, but I'm grateful that it hasn't been necessary because life is already really good and still getting better.

A Dreaded Day

I wasn't looking forward to today. I had a lot to do, and I wasn't sure I was going to find the time to do it amid all the other things I had to do, and I wasn't looking forward to those things, either. At the start of the day, it looked like today was going to be packed with stress, busyness, and stuff I didn't want to do.

Thankfully, I was wrong. Most of the things I was dreading either didn't happen or wasn't as bad as I had anticipated. This dreaded day turned out to be an alright day.

In hindsight, I realize I shouldn't've worried. That dread I felt filled me with a negative response to events that didn't end up happening. I got worked up over nothing but my own pessimistic imagination.

I should learn to stop doing this. I should learn to have more faith, hope, and optimism. I should learn to be stoic and have a more zen-like acceptance of whatever happens, devoid of emotional attachment. At the very least, I should stop dwelling on the worst possible outcomes, except insofar as is necessary to plan for them. I should have thought "if that happens, what can I do about it?" instead of "this is going to happen, and it's going to suck."

Today didn't suck, and now I feel silly for having dreaded that it would.

Rest Areas

Most video games involve some form of conflict, but many of them offer some form of respite. There are peaceful, safe areas in many video games, where you can usually rest, heal, and/or stock up on supplies. These places offer peace, safety, and an opportunity to recover from previous challenges and to prepare for the challenges ahead.

We should seek such rest areas in our own lives, and we should strive to create them whenever we can. Sundays are good days for rest, and it's best when our homes a places of peace and safety. But when one cannot find peace at the normal times and places, it's essential to find ways to find peace and rest wherever and whenever one can.

We need to be able to rest to recover from past conflicts and to prepare for upcoming challenges, so if we don't already have times and places where we can rest, we need to find such places or make them.

The Thrill and Skill of Learning

My brother and I have been playing a game called Tunic, which is deliberately unclear about many of its secrets and mechanics. In fact, a large portion of the fun of the game is in discovering the secrets and surprises the game hides. The game would be much less fun, interesting, and satisfying if it told the player everything from the very beginning, instead of withholding information.

I wonder if that's part of the reason why God withholds information from us. Naturally, there's some knowledge we're simply not ready for, but there may be other information God is willing to let us know, but that He makes contingent on us finding it. This allows us the thrill of discovery and the experience of using our observations and our reason to find knowledge that we previously didn't have. If God told us everything right from the start, we'd never have an opportunity to learn, and we'd never learn how to learn.

So, while there's certainly information I'd like God to give me, I think I'm glad He instead gave me the opportunity to learn some things for myself. Knowledge is important, but the skill of gaining knowledge may be even more important. (And also, the thrill of learning is fun. It'd be a shame to spoil that with omnipotence all at once.)

Indirect Blessings

One thing that I've learned is that blessings don't need to be direct. God doesn't come down from Heaven to literally hand us blessings, and He doesn't send angels as delivery workers. God blesses us through the earth and the sky and through the actions of those who follow His teachings and example. 

Meanwhile, we don't bless God directly, either. Sure, we pray to Him directly, but that's really more of a "Thank You" note than a real blessing. When we serve God, we do so by serving other people. We bless God by blessing His children, just as He blesses us through the blessings He showers on the earth.

For a long time, I had wished I could have a more direct relationship with God, but I've learned that I don't really need one. Yes, we can and should talk to each other directly, but we don't need the direct, semi-transactional, almost physical interaction that I had been hoping for. Indirect blessings work fine. I can continue to bless God by helping other people, and I can accept blessings from God through other people.

God gives me plenty of blessings, perhaps even all the blessings I've been asking for. He's just been giving me them indirectly.

A Timely Visit

Tomorrow morning, I'll get to see my friend again. It's been about a month since he's been diagnosed with leukemia, and he's been in the hospital ever since, until this afternoon. And now I finally get a chance to spend time with him again, to help him get his life back together, to maybe play Mario Kart with him again, or to just enjoy each other's company again. It's been a month since he's had in-person contact with anyone outside his own family and some medical professionals, and I think he has missed simply being with people. I know I've missed hanging out with him.

Visiting my friend again for the first time in a long time, I realize that this only feels special since it's been a long time since I was able to visit him. What of the people I see every day, or every week? It's strange how it stops feeling special to spend time with the people we care about when we can see them all the time. Yet, we don't really see each other, do we? We send time around each other, but we don't really spend time with each other. Perhaps, if we watched less YouTube and TV and spent more time actually interacting with each other, that feeling might be different.

I'm glad I'll get to spend some time with my best friend tomorrow. And I hope, in the future, to spend more quality time with my family, too.

Surpass the Stars

When I started my Fitness Class two months ago, I was weak. I had hardly any muscle, I had zero experience with the machines, and I was not in a position to impress anyone - least of all myself. The machines have ten-pound weights built into them, and by moving a pin, one can decide how many of those weights to use as their resistance on that machine. On my first day, I only used about two or three of those weights on each machine. Today, I averaged somewhere between six and seven, and that was after taking a five-day weekend of being partly incapacitated by an ailment. Heck, I even used eight or nine weights on some of the machines, and that's not counting the three machines that are so easy that their weights only count for half for the purpose of determining averages. Long story short, I'm a lot stronger than I was two months ago, and by the end of these four months, I'm going to be stronger still.

Some of the weights have stars drawn on them, and when I started, I didn't think I would ever be strong enough to use that many weights. At some point, I had set a goal to "reach the stars," but since then, I've reached or surpassed that level on every machine now, and this morning, I set the weights to star level, just to go slightly easier on myself today.

I've made great progress in my workouts, and I'd like to think I'm making progress in my life, too. I'm gradually growing wiser, and while there are certain areas of my life that could definitely use improvement, there are also areas in which I've improved a good deal, more than I previously might have thought possible.

This progress is encouraging, but thankfully not satisfying. I'm going to keep trying, keep improving, physically and spiritually. And if I'm diligent enough and work hard enough, I plan to surpass the stars.

Coming Home

I may have mentioned that a friend of mine has recently been diagnosed with leukemia. That friend has been in the hospital for nearly a month, undergoing chemotherapy and other procedures and treatments on an almost daily basis. Very soon, however, my friend is going to be able to come home, and he is very much looking forward to it. He's looking forward to eating good food and sleeping in his own bed. He's looking forward to being able to spend time with his friends again. His experience in the hospital has been lifesaving and necessary, but we're both grateful that it's coming to an end.

I wonder if this is what dying will be like. Earth isn't so bad, just as hospitals aren't so bad, at least not temporarily. Still, there are some comforts that exist in our heavenly home that don't exist where we are now, and there is suffering we face now that we won't have to face when we get back home. And many of us have lost loved ones, and we're looking forward to being reunited with them. In many ways, death is a lot like coming home.

Granted, going home can be a difficult and/or painful process, and there can be a lot of unknowns. Some people fear the return journey, at least partly because they're not really sure where they're going. Yet, if we've been decent people, we can be confident that the place where we're going is going to be better than here. That's not to say we should be in any rush to get home. It's dangerous to go home too soon. If my friend hadn't spent some time in the hospital, he would have died. Meanwhile, our lives on Earth are even more necessary, and we shouldn't end them before God says we're ready to come home.

Earth life is a life-changing and necessary experience, but I'm grateful that we'll get to go back to our heavenly home when it's over.

Healthy Enough to Help

I've been feeling a bit under the weather over the weekend, so much so that I took today and tomorrow off from work (though the schoolwork must go on), so I could rest and recuperate. Thanks in large part to the amount of rest I got today, I was able to help a little bit, and I hope to be able to help more tomorrow, and possibly get a second chance at doing some things that I had hoped to do over the weekend.

It's nice to feel more like myself again. I'm grateful that I was (and hope that I still will be) healthy enough to help.

Rest is Productive

I didn't get anything done this weekend. I was going to go on an errand, visit my friend in the hospital, give myself a haircut, attend church, and do any number of other good and productive things. But I didn't. Arguably, I couldn't. I can down with some some kind of ailment, and I found myself unable to do hardly anything.

Except rest.

Sometimes, we really need rest (physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, etc) before we can do anything else. When we're tired and/or sick, we need physical rest. When we are mentally, emotionally, or socially drained or burned out, we need mental, emotional, or social rest. There are times when we cannot function as people until we get the requisite amount of the appropriate kind of rest.

And when that happens, the most productive thing we can do is to do what it takes to get ourselves functional again. The most productive thing is to give ourselves the rest we need. When we need rest, resting is the most productive thing we can do.

So, in that sense, my weekend was fairly productive. I feel mostly better, better enough to do most of my regularly scheduled work tomorrow. Sure, I'd like to have gotten more done this weekend, but I did the one most important and productive thing I could have done.

I rested.

"Shine Where I am Walking"

When 10-year-old Bonnie H. Cordon was tasked with leading L. Tom Perry through a cornfield at night, she wisely brought a flashlight with her, but she didn't think to point it anywhere in particular, and without a steady light to guide his steps, Elder Perry stepped right into an irrigation ditch. For the return trip, Elder Perry told Sister Cordon, "Bonnie, I need to see the path. I need the light to shine where I am walking."

We, too, need the light to shine along our path, and, specifically, we need it to shine on the next step we should take. As each person is in a different place in their lives, each person needs the light to shine in a different place to help them see where they're going. So, as we try to help others along the path, we need to be mindful of where they currently stand on that path, and we need to shine the light where it's needed most, right on their next step. If we don't know where they are, spiritually, it'll be almost impossible to get them from there to where they need to be. We can't give them directions if we don't know where they are.

So, let's try to understand each other and where we are on our paths in life. If we want to give others guidance they can use, we need to understand where they are and what they need. It's good to have light and be willing to shine it on their path, but more specifically, we need to focus the light right where they're walking.

Bad Blessings

Earlier today, I had wanted to visit my best friend on my way to do something else I was planning on doing today. Unfortunately, circumstances conspired against making that possible, and I had to stay home. As it turns out, that might have been a blessing in disguise. As the day progressed, if became more and more evident that I was not fully well, and I ended up being grateful that I wasn't able to risk infecting my friend.

I'm ultimately glad I wasn't able to visit my friend today. Granted, a nicer blessing might have been to cure my sickness or not let it get me in the first place, but I know that afflictions like these are inevitable and sometimes necessary. I'm just glad I was afflicted enough today that I wasn't able to accidentally risk afflicting my friend, who is already facing afflictions enough.

Today was a rough day, but it could have been worse, and part of what made today mostly okay was, ironically, because it had started off so badly.

Doing Good and Feeling Good

Right now, I feel good.

This morning, I felt pretty crummy. I had a lot of things going on and too many things going wrong, and I felt like life was just one annoying, irritating problem after another. Yet, after maybe two hours of working, I managed to get some assignments cleared off of my To Do list, and I was able to help some appreciative people with some simple, physical work. It felt good to be useful and to get stuff done.

Granted, some of the problems that I had been concerned about still exist, and it's going to take more work to resolve them, but I'm now in a state of mind where I can approach those problems with a positive attitude.

I had been concerned about having too much on my plate, but I've cleared a few things off of it since then, and I've been doing good and feeling good. And this good feeling makes me feel like keeping up the good work.

It's motivating, and it feels amazing.

Varying Value

I know I've blogged about this before, but better, but when he was young, Benjamin Franklin bought a whistle. He paid a decent amount of money for it, four pennies, if I recall correctly, but he really loved that whistle, and he had a lot of fun with it. But then he learned that he had paid far more than the whistle actually cost, and he felt cheated and upset. Yet, this proved to be a valuable lesson for him, and it probably saved him from overpaying many times thereafter.

At first, I think I concluded that the value of the whistle didn't change, but I think it actually did. Value is subjective. If something has great value to us, then it has great value, at least to us. And if we don't value something, then it doesn't have value to us. Things are "worth" whatever they're selling for. If we're willing to pay a lot to get something, and we'd have to be paid a lot to be willing to give it up, then it has great value to us, regardless of whatever value others place on it. And if we'll not willing to pay much for something, or if we're willing to sell it for cheap, then it isn't worth very much to us, even if others value it highly.

What's great about this is that means that we're as rich as we want to be. We can look at the blessings in our lives, think about how much we'd have to be paid in order to be willing to sell it, and consider the fact that we have blessings that we wouldn't sell for all the world, and that makes us very rich indeed.

I'm grateful for that which I have, and I value it highly, and for that reason, I believe that I am very richly blessed.

Change

I've been thinking a bit about change and why some people are resistant to it. Some people view change as potentially dangerous. Any change could be a change for the worse, whereas if a situation doesn't change, it'll stay as good as it is. A lack of change can be comforting for those who are already comfortable. However, a lack of change isn't sustainable, and it's probably not even good.

We can't stop the world from changing, and even if we could, it wouldn't be good if we did. We're on this Earth to make progress, and progress can't happen without change. Sure, there may be some missteps along the way. Some of the changes that get made may turn out to be changes for the worse. But when that happens, the solution isn't stagnation but more and better changes. When we make mistakes, we should own up to them, correct them, and continue to try to improve from there.

While I am cautious to try to ensure that the changes I make are good ones, I know that there cannot be more good without change. We need to continue to make progress. We need to grow, and growth requires change. Rather than resisting change or merely allowing change to happen, we need to try to make changes for the better, because nothing is going to get better if we never allow it to change.

Faith in Future Me

When presented with a complex logic problem that I wasn't sure how to solve, I wrote to myself "I have no friggin' clue, but you'll figure it out. I have faith in Future Me." As it turns out, my faith was well-founded. I puzzled the problem out, solved it, and wrote "Past Me was right to have faith in Present Me."

There is a certain amount of wisdom in having faith in our own abilities, or at least our own potential. There are feats that we are capable of, be they feats of logic, athletics, strength, logistics, or anything else. There are things that we are capable of doing, and we can wisely have faith in our ability to do them.

Naturally, it's possible for this faith to go too far. Overconfidence occasionally occurs. Yet, in my experience, underconfidence is more common, and is sometimes more harmful to our progress. One with too much confidence would make an attempt, fail, and potentially learn from the experience, whereas one with too little confidence would decline making the attempt and would thus learn nothing. So long as the benefit of experience outweighs the consequences of failure, overconfidence is preferable to underconfidence.

Furthermore, it's possible for our competence to grow to match our confidence. Even if we know we cannot succeed currently, it's good to believe that, with enough training, preparation, and strategy, we can succeed at a future time. That faith in our future selves can encourage us to work toward the success we know we can have, which can help us grow in our abilities, even to the point of gaining capabilities we didn't previously have. Even if our Present Selves cannot accomplish a given feat, perhaps our Future Selves can.

Likewise, it's also possible for our competence to shrink to match our lack of confidence in ourselves. The less we believe in ourselves, the less often we try. The less we try, the more our abilities will wane through disuse. Thus, the less confidence we have in ourselves, the less practice and experience we'll give ourselves, and the less competence we'll ultimately have.

The more we try, the better we'll get, and inversely, the less we try, the worse we'll get. So, a large part of success is having enough faith in ourselves to try. There are things we can do, and there are things we can become capable of doing, and it is good and wise to believe that we can do them.

Two New Pieces of the Armor of God

During our Family Scripture Study tonight, I learned of two new pieces of the armor of God of which I had not previously known.

Isaiah 59:17 For he put on righteousness as a breastplate, and an helmet of salvation upon his head; and he put on the garments of vengeance for clothing, and was clad with zeal as a cloak.

We already knew about the breastplate of righteousness and the helmet of salvation, but the clothing of vengeance and the cloak of zeal are new.

The clothing of vengeance doesn't pertain to us. The "he" in this verse is Jesus Christ, and as we read in Romans 12:19, vengeance is the Lord's.

Romans 12:19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

The cloak of zeal, however, may be useful to us. Oxford defines zeal as "great energy or enthusiasm in pursuit of a cause or an objective," which is something we can all strive to have. It can be difficult to maintain such enthusiasm, just as it's difficult to constantly maintain the breastplate of righteousness, but it's a worthy goal to strive for.

It was interesting to learn of these two new (to me) pieces of the Armor of God, especially the cloak of zeal. I hope to gain more energy and enthusiasm in my cause, so I too can be "clad with zeal as a cloak" and thus more fully do as directed in Ephesians 6:11 and "put on the whole armour of God."

"How is Gamora?"

In Avengers: Infinity War, a small group of Avengers run into a group called the Guardians of the Galaxy. Both groups mistake each other for their mutual enemy, Thanos, who had taken Gamora, a member of the Guardians of the Galaxy, captive. During a stalemate in the ensuing fight, leader of the Guardians demands, "Where is Gamora?" Not knowing who Gamora even is, the leader of the Avengers says, "I'll do you one better. Who is Gamora?" And Drax, a member of the Guardians whose frequent misunderstanding of language often adds unintended levity, says "I'll do you one better. Why is Gamora?" Personally, I think it would have been better to have someone ask, "How is Gamora?"

At the time, Gamora was in mortal peril, but danger is rarely the only problem when one is alone. A person who is alone may tend to feel lonely, isolated, or disconnected. They may feel an absence of human connection and love. Sometimes, being alone isn't the source of the problem(s), but a symptom. Sometimes, people want to be alone to escape the negative feelings they have around other people. Either way, a person being alone is a sign that something may be wrong. Maybe something is wrong because they're alone, or maybe they're alone because something is wrong, maybe neither, or maybe both.

So, when someone is alone, and you have a close enough of a connection to them that reaching out to them wouldn't make the possibly existing problem worse, it may be kind to reach out to them and ask them how they're doing. Maybe they're facing problems because they're alone, or maybe they're choosing to be alone because they were facing problems. If you care about their problems, it is sometimes kind to reach out to those who are or feel alone.