Facing Affliction as a Family

One positive thing about adversity that often gets overlooked is its ability to bring people together. When a group faces a problem together, they usually end up with a stronger bond by the time the adversity has been overcome. That is what I think and hope is happening with my immediate family as we cope with the illness my mom and I have had for the last few days. We've had to lean on each other most than usual. We've had to be patient with one another and try harder to work together, and I think that's helping us to become a stronger family group. We don't often do things together, but enduring this illness is something we've had to pull together on, and I'm thankful that we've been able to work together to help each other get through this. It hasn't been easy, but this has been exactly the kind of experience that can help us grow closer together. By the time we all overcome this illness, I think we'll be glad that we were able to do it as a family.

One Measure of Perfection

Before I review Elder Holland's excellent General Conference talk, I think that now, while I'm still sick, would be a good time to point out a small distinction between the Bible and the Book of Mormon. The first time Jesus said "Be ye therefore perfect," it was during His mortal ministry, and He qualified it with "even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect" (Matt 5:48). However, after His death and resurrection, He visited the Nephites and also told them "Therefore I would that ye should be perfect," but this time, He followed it with "even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect" (3 Nephi 12:48). In both cases, Jesus invites or commands His followers to be perfect, but the first time, He only suggested that God was perfect, while the second time, He suggested that both He and the Father were perfect.

Now, we don't really know why Jesus said one thing the first time and a different thing the next time. Maybe He just didn't want to scare His mortal followers with the claim that He, a mortal, was perfect. But some have supposed that the reason Jesus didn't claim to be perfect at that time was because He wasn't perfect then, at least, not in every sense of the word. He was, and remained sinless, so He was "perfect" in that sense, but "perfect" can also mean "complete," and, having not been resurrected yet, I'm not sure that Christ, with a mortal body, was truly "complete."

I believe that resurrection is an essential part of our eternal progress. We can't be our best, most perfect self without a resurrected, perfected body. That is what I think Jesus meant when He included Himself as an example of a perfect being after His resurrection, but not before it. Maybe He needed a resurrected body to be "perfect," as do we. There are several traits we need in order to be perfect. Speaking only for myself, I know that there are many areas in which I could stand to improve before I would consider myself a perfect being, and getting over this dumb cold is one of those areas. Perfect beings, I would guess, are not subject to illness, and while I'm not sure if Christ, Himself, ever got sick, I believe that He could have as long as He was mortal and that He needed to overcome that limitation before He could call Himself "perfect."

Duties Delayed

I'm still sick, and while I still think that this illness isn't permanent, its longevity has some troubling implications for the near future. I may need to change some of my immediate plans. I have already contacted my primary co-teacher to let him know that he may need to cover this Sunday's lesson for me if I'm not well enough to come to church. I also need to contact the jury office to let them know that my jury service may need to be delayed. My General Conference talk blog post might be delayed as well.

Thankfully, all of these things, plus the things I had planned to get done over the last few days, are flexible. My laundry situation isn't desperate yet, taking my bike to the shop isn't urgent, and Miriam and I can prune the apple tree any time we both feel up to it. I'm lucky that I'm between semesters right now, so very few of my obligations are time-sensitive. I hope to be back to my old self again shortly, so I can do all the things I've been planning to do, but I'm thankful that, in the meantime, most of those things can wait.

A Gift Taken for Granted

One thing that I've learned from this ongoing illness is that one should not take one's blessings for granted. I am normally a physically-fit and able-bodied young man. I'm used to being able to get up and do things with little effort or discomfort. I'm used to shaking off illnesses quickly, when I get sick at all. But for the last two days, I haven't been able to do things as easily as I normally do. This may be God's way of reminding me that this body is neither perfect nor permanent. I may (normally) be strong and capable now, but that can change just as easily as sustaining a crippling injury or becoming subject to an illness from which I never recover.

I expect to recover from this illness within a few days, though I had previously hoped to overcome it in a few hours or a day at the most, but still, I don't think that this illness is permanent. This is just a reminder that my good health isn't permanent either. So I should be thankful for what I have for as long as it lasts and be willing to give back to God those things which God gave me, including my health and fitness. Once I'm resurrected, my healthy body will be mine for keeps, but until then, I should be thankful that God is letting me borrow a body at all, especially when, even at this point of weakness, I'm am still much more physically blessed than many others. Even as I am now, my relatively good health is a blessing from God, and like all of God's blessings, it should be used to serve others, can be easily rescinded, and certainly shouldn't be taken for granted.

Well Enough

I've been sick all day today. I spent most of the day laying down, coughing, and trying to get some sleep. But, despite how sick I've been, I've been well enough to help take care of my sister, watch a movie, and write this blog post, so I've got that to be thankful for. I've been very sick today, but when it came to fulfilling my responsibilities and enjoying a few comforting blessings, I'm blessed to say that I've been well enough.

Wishlists

Piggybacking on my blog post from yesterday about exchanging gifts with God, it has occurred to me that we can each use "wishlists" in this gift exchange.

God asks for particular acts of service through callings, promptings, and Patriarchal Blessings. He uses these tools to give us specific instructions for what He wants us, personally, to do, in addition to the general commandments He gives everybody.

In return, we can request particular blessings through prayer and fasting. There are many blessings that God is willing to grant us if we ask for them, and we essentially get to choose which (and how many) of those we get, so it makes sense to ask God for the blessings we especially want.

Of course, we don't always get exactly what we want from God any more than we always get exactly what's on our wishlists, especially when what we ask for isn't actually what's best for us. But it couldn't hurt to ask, and it also couldn't hurt to make sure that we're giving God the gifts He specifically requests of us.

Exchanging Gifts with God

This morning, I came to the realization that we can exchange gifts with God.

Giving God gifts is fairly easy. He accepts all gifts of service and righteousness, including even just attempts at righteousness. Gifts we can give God include repenting, being kind to others, and doing any good thing we can think of. God has a lot of gifts on His wishlist, and He's fairly easy to please.

He also frequently gives gifts to us. God's gifts to us include just about everything, from the air we breathe to the blessings of the Gospel. He sometimes even blesses us with miracles. But, if we broaden our definition of "miracle" and keep our eyes and hearts open, it becomes easy to see that God gives us gifts daily, and we should do the same for Him.

Of course, the most important part of a gift exchange is the gifts that we are giving, not the gifts we expect to receive. This isn't an actual exchange of gifts. We're not trading. It's possible to join into contractual agreements with God, where He covenants to give us some blessings in exchange for some gifts that we covenant to give Him, but that's not what I'm talking about right now. I'm talking about the voluntary giving of gifts on both sides that happens on a daily basis. In this case, we and God give each other gifts, not because we agreed to, but "just because." God gives us gifts because He loves us, and we should give Him gifts to show that we love Him.

I am thankful that God loves me enough to grant me so many wonderful blessings, and I'm thankful that He gave me such a wide variety of opportunities to show my thanks and love for Him. There are a great many blessings that we receive from God, and there are also many ways that we can bless Him in return. It's fun to give and receive gifts on Christmas, and I'm glad to know that we can give and receive gifts to and from God on every other day as well.

Merry Christmas!

By the time you read this message, it will be Christmas (or some time thereafter), so I would like to wish you a Merry Christmas. In doing so, I'm reminded of a quote from a good book, so I think I'll elaborate on that.

Primarily, I wish that you have a merry Christmas. I want your holiday to be a good one. I hope you have a fun and pleasant experience that leaves you with happy memories.

I do not, however, wish to wish you a merry Christmas against your will. If you don't want to have a "Merry Christmas," perhaps because you don't observe Christmas and/or don't like it and would rather be left alone, I think I can be okay with it. I want you to have a good day, whether that means having a "Merry Christmas" or not.

I, for one, intend to have a merry Christmas. I am satisfied with the quality of the gifts I'll be giving, and I trust that the recipients will enjoy receiving them as much as I enjoy giving them. And, of course, I will enjoy receiving the gifts that have been gotten for me as well. But even without the presents and the happiness they bring, I expect that I'll be merry on Christmas because I'll be spending time with my family, as sappy as that sounds. I enjoy their company, and I'd enjoy spending the day with them even if we weren't going to spend it exchanging and enjoying gifts.

Christmas is a time to be merry. It's a time to exchange warm wishes, warm hugs, and perhaps a few gifts as well. It's a time to spend with family and close friends: those who make us happy. I hope that you have good reasons to be happy this Christmas, or that you choose to be happy whether you have reasons to be happy or not.

That is most of what I mean when I wish you a "Merry Christmas."

Waiting to be Asked

Today, and most other days, I failed in a way that my sister-in-law easily succeeded yesterday. Today, I passed up opportunities to help others. In some cases, I didn't notice the opportunities. In others, I saw the opportunities, but didn't want to volunteer, so I waited to be asked. My sister-in-law didn't wait to be asked for help. As far as I could tell, she sort of just jumped in, just like my sister did with helping me with my home-made gift. I could stand to learn a lot from those two women. While it's courteous to ask if one's help is wanted, it is also very generous to step in and offer assistance without having to be asked. I have a small and probably undeserved reputation for helping people, but that's mainly because people have asked me for help and I have had a hard time saying no. I should learn to offer my help voluntarily instead of waiting for my friends and family to ask for it.

Part of the Gift

Why do we wrap presents in wrapping paper? It helps to preserve the secret of the gift, but a cardboard box would serve that purpose just as well. It gives the giver a blank slate on which to write down whom the gift is for, but most cardboard boxes do the same. It seems to me that a person could, in many cases, forgo the wrapping, and the gift would be just as good.

Yet, I think that there is some purpose to wrapping gifts in wrapping paper. It makes the presents look prettier, it makes the gift more fun to open, and it shows the receiver that the giver was willing to put in a lot of extra, pointless work, just to make receiving the gift a little bit more enjoyable. In some ways, the paper itself, and the work that went into wrapping it around the present, is part of the present.

There are some traditions that we do just for tradition's sake, and wrapping the presents in colorful paper might be one of them, but now that I think about it, I think that the wrapping paper does serve a purpose, albeit a small one. It makes the gift just a little bit nicer than it already was. Now, whether that's worth the extra amount of work  the wrapping process requires is up to each individual to decide, but as long as it's not too much extra work, I think that wrapping a present up in wrapping paper can, in some small way, improve the quality of the gift.

Messiah - He Is / Was Despised . . . And We Esteemed Him Not.

One of the songs in Handel's Messiah is based on Isaiah 53:4

He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

 I think the verbs are interesting here. These words were written by Isaiah well before Jesus' time, yet he wrote it in the present and past tenses, as though they had already happened and were still happening. I think that shows the faith Isaiah had in the truth of his prophecy, similar to the faith Lehi had when he said "I have obtained a land of promise" long before his family actually reached it (1 Nephi 5:5).

Yet, the present tense could have been true for Isaiah, and it is certainly true for us. Jesus Christ doesn't have to be personally on the earth to be "despised and rejected of men." People despise and reject Him in every age, including both Isaiah's and ours.

But I think the point of Isaiah's passage isn't to point fingers at those who reject Christ and those who have rejected Him, but to make sure that we don't reject Him as well. We should try to make sure that we don't "hid[e] as it were our faces from him." We shouldn't back down and stay quiet when people despise and reject Christ. Too many people have already done that, as the Apostle Peter will attest. And I wouldn't be surprised if a few of the people in the mob calling for Jesus' death were just following the crowd. It's far too easy to simply go with the flow and not make waves and the world drifts further and further into apostasy.

The lament in Isaiah 53:4 isn't just that "He is despised and rejected of men," but also that "he was despised, and we esteemed him not." Let's not make the same mistake. Christ was and is and will be rejected, but not by us. Let us stand by Him and esteem Him, even if the rest of the world despises Him.

Anytime Messiah

Because I had a fairly busy schedule earlier this month, I missed an opportunity to attend a Messiah sing-along, which is too bad because I think I would have enjoyed it. Handel's Messiah is probably the greatest set of music ever created, and many parts are fun to sing along to. The good news for me is that I don't actually have to attend a sing-along concert to sing along to it. I have the internet. A quick Youtube search for "Handel's Messiah," perhaps throwing in keywords like "complete" or "lyrics," will give me access to all the Messiah music I want, and as long as I sing quietly enough not to bother my sister in the other room, I see no reason why I couldn't sing along with the music as well. I can have my own one-man Messiah sing-along concert almost any time I want! I'm thankful for that (though, by this time tomorrow, my sister might not be). I'm thankful that it's so easy to access good music like the Messiah, and I'm thankful that the actual Messiah is even easier to access. We can pray and talk with the Messiah any time we feel like it, and we can usually do so without bothering anybody. It's a great blessing to be able to have an audience with the King of Kings any time we want to and that we can sing His praises any time, whether there's an audience or not.

"Stand By Me"

Let's see if I can remember how to do this.



I hope that worked. It's been a while, a long while, since I've tried to share a video with you guys, but I figured that this video was worth sharing for two reasons. First, Dahlia Row, the group that's performing in this video, is incredible and they deserve far more subscribers than they have. If you liked this song, check out some of their other songs as well. Second, when I heard this song, I immediately began to see spiritual messages in it.

The way I interpreted this song, the male singer is praying, partly to express his faith and partly to seek comfort during a time of trial. In my interpretation, his wife has died, and he is praying for his wife's spirit to stay with him to give him the comfort and support he needs to go on living without her.

The wife, in her part, expresses her faith that, even if the world falls apart, that won't be too tragic as long as her husband stays worthy enough to join her in heaven. She recognizes that mortal life is fleeting and that this world won't last forever - it was never meant to. This world was just meant to serve as a vehicle by which people can come together and inherit the Celestial Kingdom. As long as it does that, it doesn't matter what happens to the earth afterwards.

It was the double meaning of "stand by me" that convinced me to blog about this. When the male singer sings it, I think he means for a comforting spirit to stand by him by strengthening him and helping him get through life, but when the female singer sings it, I think she means for him to stay worthy to stand by her in the Celestial Kingdom.

Unfortunately, my interpretation falls apart about two-and-a-half minutes into the video, when the male singer sings "Whenever you're in trouble, won't you stand by me." In my opinion, and to make my interpretation work, it should have been the female singer who sang that line.

But if we can overlook or mentally misattribute that line, this song can convey this powerful message: The circumstances of this life don't matter as long as we maintain a strong, close relationship with the Spirit. No matter what happens, things will work out, so long and we stand by the the Spirit and the Spirit stands by us. To make this happen, we need to be righteous. That's how we can keep close to the Holy Spirit, and thus, how we can keep the Holy Spirit close to us.

Gingerbread

I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but some time within the last few months, I discovered a possible Christian meaning of gingerbread. I was waiting for a good opportunity to share my discovery with you, and since the next General Conference talk covers a similar theme, I figure that now is probably the best time.

There are two things that are typically made out of gingerbread: gingerbread houses and gingerbread men. Both of these things can point us to Christ, as He was the Bread of Life, and He was born in Bethlehem, which means "House of Bread." In his talk, The Living Bread Which Came Down from Heaven, Elder D. Todd Christofferson reminded us of the significance of the symbolism of Christ being the "living bread." He said that part of the meaning behind the symbolism is a reminder of the importance of internalizing the attributes of Christ. You are what you eat, and if what you eat reminds you of Jesus Christ, and specifically of our need to strive to be like Him, all the better.

At Christmastime, there is symbolic meaning behind almost everything. In fact, I recall hearing that all things testify of Christ. As we search for symbolic meaning in the symbols of Christmas, we will find them, and when we do, those symbols, in our minds, can become symbols of Christ. Personally, I am going to see a bit more significance behind gingerbread men and houses in the future, and I hope that that significance will help me remember Christ's humble origins and how we need to internalize Christ's qualities and teachings, just as we might "internalize" a house or man made of gingerbread.

Travel Companion

The reason I blogged from my phone last night was that I was in San Francisco with my brother at the time. On that trip, I learned a few of the merits of having a travel companion. Two heads are better than one, as they say, so being able to discuss our plans helped us make better plans than either of us would have made on our own. The same goes for two sets of eyes and ears. We helped each other find what we were looking for and keep an eye out for danger at all times, even when checking a map. We even used our different strengths to aid the party of two in different ways. My brother came up with good ideas and I found ways to execute those ideas. Our strengths and weaknesses balanced each other out fairly well, and we both agreed that we should go on a similar adventure together some time in the future.

By my brother is not the only travel companion I want to have with me. The Holy Ghost makes an excellent travel companion for CHOOSE most all CHOOSE of the reasons I've mentioned, and then some. The Holy Ghost is an excellent source of inspiration and revelation, which can be very helpful to forming good plans. He can warn us of dangers we don't quite catch. And he always seems to know exactly what to say to help us in our given situation, making His contributions perfectly tailored to us.

I plan to travel with my brother again. I'm not sure when, but I'm sure it'll happen. In the meantime, I'm going to try to keep the Holy Ghost as my companion through all my earthly travels. He's an excellent companion to travel with, especially as we wander through this exciting and dangerous place so far from our heavenly home.

I'm blogging from my phone again, for reasons that I'll tell you later, so I'll keep this brief. Today, I learned that it's important to spend quality time with family, especially if you're doing something fun together. It's a great bonding experience.

Promise or No Promise

Now that I'm not as tired and frustrated as I was last night, I've given premortal promises another thought, and I've concluded that, whether they're morally binding or not, we should probably keep them anyway.

God wants what's best for us. What He wants for us is what we should want for ourselves. If He has a work He wants us to do, it would probably work out pretty well for us to do it. This task was basically hand-made or hand-selected for us by the one who knows us best. It's probably either right up our alley or exactly what we need. Either way, I'm sure God will bless us if we do what He asks.

Whether we're under a moral obligation to do what God commands is irrelevant. Regardless of any obligation or lack thereof, we should do it, if only for the blessings we are bound to get out of it.

Forgotten Promises

I watched Elder John C. Pingree Jr's talk "I Have a Work For Thee" recently, and it got me thinking about something that is almost completely unrelated: Is a person morally obligated to keep a promise they forgot they made? This question was inspired by the situation we are currently in, having made promises we can no longer remember in the premortal world, but we'll get to that later, after having tackled some easier instances of this problem first.

First, the case of a contract. I'm pretty sure that, if a person makes a contractual arrangement, they are legally obligated to hold up their end of the deal, even if the entire deal has slipped their mind. However, if there is a good reason for the forgetting, like an accident-induced bout of amnesia, a just might let that person off the hook. I imagine that God is at least as just and understanding. So, if we make a promise, and then get hit in the head so hard that we forget the promise, I don't think either God or man would consider us honor-bound to keep that promise.

Then, what of the promises we made before passing through the veil of forgetfulness? Are we obligated to keep those? I'm not 100% sure on this, but it looks like maybe not. I wonder, then, what the point of making those promises was. I doubt God would ask us to do something so pointless, so maybe those promises are binding after all. Still, is that fair? Can a person be required to do something they forgot they agreed to do?

In all this conversation, I intentionally exclude liars. Those who only say that they forgot they made a promise are still morally obligated to keep it, but what of those who have genuinely forgotten, especially those who were caused to forget by circumstances outside of their control? I would hope that God would not expect us to keep the promises that we couldn't help forgetting we had made. But then, why would God ask us to make those promises at all?

I'm sure there's a logical explanation, but right now, I'm too tired to figure it out. I'm going to go to bed now and work on this puzzle sometime later, unless, of course, I forget to come back to it.

Teaching About the Tragedy

Today, my favorite Youtubers posted a video about the Tragedy of the Commons. The Tragedy of the Commons is a dilemma when a resource is shared by a group of individuals. Collectively, this group has a mutual interest in using this resource wisely, but individually, each person has something to gain by taking as much of the shared resource for themselves. Inevitably, people get greedy. One person tries to get more than their share, or at least seems like they might do so in the future, and in response, everyone rushes to make sure they can get as much of the resource as they can before it's all snatched up by someone else. When people behave this way, the resource runs out quickly, which is bad for everyone, but if people could learn to be fair and patient, they could use the resource wisely, and perhaps even use it to gain more of that resource, which would be great for everyone. Everyone has a short-term incentive to take what they can get, but long-term, each person has an incentive to cooperate with the rest of the group.

So much of the trouble in life stems from people not behaving wisely. People make dumb decisions all the time, which hurt themselves and the rest of society. Fortunately, the gospel teaches us principles that can help us avoid these pitfalls. These include patience, wisdom, charity, humility, and developing a more eternal perspective. If we apply these principles, they can help us avoid falling into the trap of thinking that we'd be best served by taking as much as we can for ourselves.

Unfortunately, the true tragedy in the Tragedy of the Commons is that, in order to avoid a total collapse of the system, everyone needs to understand the Tragedy of the Commons and work together to prevent it. It's not enough for a few individuals to use the resource wisely; everyone needs to follow that plan. Otherwise, any individual could still take everything, and those who mutually agreed to not take more than their share would all be out of luck. We need to cooperate with each other to make the best use of our resources, so, as important as it is to be a wise individual, it's also important to teach wisdom as well.

A New Rule for Blogging about Conference

I need to get back to blogging about General Conference talks. We're almost half-way through December and I haven't finished blogging about the talks I was supposed to blog about in November. The reason for that is mostly that I've been reluctant to blog about Elder Dalin H. Oak's talk The Plan and the Proclamation. As good as his talk is, and as glad as I am that he gave it, I don't really feel like reiterating it or adding to it.

In hindsight, I should have skipped it weeks ago rather than letting myself fall so far behind. But I can catch up, and, starting next year, I'm going to have a "buffer" month, since there will only be five total sessions per General Conference, which will still be 6 months apart. Falling behind in blogging about Conference talks isn't much of a problem, and it will soon be even less so. But even so, I should try not to let it happen. Blogging about General Conference talks is beneficial in too many ways for me to perpetually put it off.

Perhaps I ought to set a new rule for myself. Maybe, in addition to the goal of blogging about one session per month, I can set the goal of blogging about at least one General Conference talk a week. If a miss a week because I kept putting off the talk I was supposed to blog about, I'll skip that Conference talk and move on to the next week's talk. That way, I'd never fall too far behind, and I'd hopefully never go too long without blogging about General Conference.

Post-Deathbed Repentance

Some people wait until they're near death to repent. With our knowledge of Spirit Prison and Eternal Progression, we know that it's possible to repent even after one has died. Yet, in either case, it's definitely not the best option. There are rewards for living righteously while in mortality, and I don't think God will take too kindly to people who disregard His laws during their lives, planning to repent after they've had their fun. Post-deathbed repentance may be possible, but repenting swiftly is much better.

Limits to Omnipotence

I recently mentioned in a paper I wrote that my personal understanding of God does not require Him to be omnipotent. In fact, I'm not sure He can be. Consider the Euthyphro Problem. Euthyphro once asked another philosopher (Socrates, I think) whether moral acts were moral because God commands us to do them or whether God commands us to do those acts because they are moral. My answer to that question is the latter. I believe that there are universal moral laws whose existence predate the Godhood of God. I do not believe that God can change those laws or break them without consequences. This means that there is at least one thing that God cannot do. Hence, He is not truly omnipotent.

I also have problems with omnipotence in general. There are dozens of paradoxes that illustrate the problems that omnipotence can encounter. For example, could an omnipotent being create a rock so heavy that that being couldn't move it? One's first thought might be "no, because an omnipotent being could move a rock of any weight," but that would mean that there is at least one thing that that omnipotent being could not do: create an immovably heavy rock. Omnipotence seems to be impossible.

I acknowledge that God is very powerful. I might even be able to acknowledge that "He has all power in heaven and in earth," as we sometimes read in scripture, as long as that doesn't imply that He has the power to override the universal laws that go beyond this heaven and this earth. He certainly seems to be powerful enough to consider Him omnipotent for all reasonable intents and purposes. Yet, I don't think that God is truly omnipotent, and I'm not altogether certain that true omnipotence can even exist.

What is "Art"?

I'm studying for my Humanities final, and there are several paintings and sculptures whose titles and artists I'm supposed to know that I would readily identify as art. (I'd list a few examples, but it's hard to pick the most notable ones, and I'm short on time.) Then, there are paintings and sculptures that I would hesitate to describe as art. Jackson Pollock's Autumn Rhythm comes to mind. There is no "autumn" or "rhythm" in this piece, just black and white pain haphazardly splattered onto a beige canvas. Is that "art"? Even less deserving of the title of "art" is Marcel Duchamp's Bottle Rack, which is literally just a rack for drying glass bottles. Duchamp bought it at a department store and called it art, having made no modifications to it at all.

That, in my opinion, is not art. However, my opinion isn't the only one that matters. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe the same is true of art. Maybe whether something is art or not depends entirely on the person looking at it. If you look at a painting or an object, and you see artistic meaning and value in it, then, to you, it's art. But my untrained eye does not see much, if any artistic value in Autumn Rhythm or Bottle Rack, so, to me, they're not art.

Simultaneous Study and Prayer

Today, I had a more spiritual experience praying in a public bathroom than I had had reading the Book of Mormon in my bedroom at home. That's because when I prayed in the bathroom, I was really praying, but when I was reading the Book of Mormon, I was just reading it. I wasn't studying it. I wasn't pondering it. I was just reading.

I need to stop doing that, and I think I know how.

I think that I can make both my praying and my Book of Mormon reading more effective if I do them both at the same time. If I pray while I read, it'll help me focus on my reading. It'll help me ponder and internalize what I'm reading. It will help give my prayer more focus as well.

I've heard that if you want to talk to God, you should pray, and if you want God to talk to you, you should read the scriptures. I propose that if you want to have a two-way conversation with God, with each of you communicating and responding to each other, it might be worth trying to read and pray at the same time.

Using the Manual

I just finished looking over the lesson I'm going to teach on Sunday about the Salt Lake City Temple. Largely because they enjoy reading and because it's easy to frame and pace a lesson this way, I'm going to have the children read most of the lesson from the manual, making sure to lead a discussion between each paragraph to help the children understand and internalize what they read. However, there's an important part of the lesson that I won't have the children read.

A main part of the lesson is the Law of Chastity. The idea is that, in the temple, we make covenants to keep God's commandments and stay faithful to our spouse for eternity. This is, of course, very important, but it can also be somewhat awkward, especially given the age of my class. Many of them are both mature enough and immature enough for this lesson to get out of hand in a hurry if I'm not careful. Naturally, I'm going to have to choose my words carefully, or let the manual choose for me. Fortunately for me, the manual phrases the Law of Chastity part of the lesson fairly well, so I'll probably end up using much of the manual verbatim to help me teach that part of the lesson.

I'm thankful for the quality of the manual I've been provided. So many of the books and manuals we have in this church explain gospel topics so well that it would almost be foolish not to use them in our talks and lessons. Of course, when we use our manuals in such a way, we have to be careful to make sure our lessons don't become boring, and we will have to make sure we really study the material so we can learn it rather than just reading it and repeating it. Still, even with their minor drawbacks, these manuals are great tools, and I certainly plan on making good use of mine.

Reallocating Time

It has just occurred to me that I haven't blogged about General Conference in a while. Looking back at my records, I see that I have fallen behind; I still have a handful of General Conference talks that I should have blogged about in November. But first, I know that I need to study for my Primary lesson this Sunday. And the time that I don't spend studying the Gospel should probably be spent studying for my Humanities final next week or working on the Philosophy paper that's due two days after that. I have some important deadlines coming up, and I'm starting to fall behind.

Yet, this week, there are also several holiday-related and non-holiday-related events that I plan to attend. I expect to spend a good deal of time away from home, away from my computer, away from my studies. I wonder if this is wise. Of course, I know that there must be moderation in all things and that spending too much time or too little time on anything can be harmful, but how much is too much, and how little is too little?

I don't think I'm in any danger of spending too much time studying this week. However, I have, so far, spent too little time on Christmas. Perhaps I ought to proceed with my plans to attend those Christmas events, and make cuts elsewhere, as needed. I certainly can afford to ignore Youtube for a while, and I can probably manage to cut down on my Facebook time as well. I have a dire need to spend time studying this week, and I should probably make some time for Christmas as well. If that means spending less time on other things, that's what needs to happen.

Walking with God

Today, as part of my commute, I had the privilege of taking a couple of long-ish walks. I talked to myself and I prayed a bit. Generally, it was quiet and peaceful and quite enjoyable. Just being able to spend some time in quiet reflection was a far greater blessing to me than travelling more quickly would have been. Yesterday, I rode my bike, which was much faster, but which also gave me less time to think and talk. I liked walking today. I liked waiting for trains. I liked spending time outside, breathing relatively fresh air, getting a moderate amount of exercise, and spending that downtime far more productively than I typically do. When I'm at home and don't have any pressing obligations, I waste my time on my computer. When I'm travelling and it's too cold, dark, and/or wet to bike, I spend a good portion of my time walking with God.

Come, Peasant King

One of the songs that the ward choir is practising right now is a version of "What Child Is This?" which contains the line "Come, peasant, king, to own Him." Since I'm a bit of an English nerd, I've really latched on to the punctuation of that sentence and how its meaning would change if we were to remove that second comma.

As it stands now, the invitation is addressed to both "peasant" and "king," showing that the invitation is open to people at a variety of social and economic levels, implying that the invitation to come unto Christ is open to just about everybody, which is a great message, but if you remove that second comma, the meaning becomes very different.

Without that comma, the invitation is no longer open to both "peasant" and "king," but to a person who is, somehow, a "peasant king." This description seems like a contradiction, but there are at least two ways in which it could apply to any of us.

First, we could be kings in terms of our wealth and blessings, but peasants compared to God. Most of us aren't unbelievably wealthy, but most of us have enough to get by, which is more than what some can say. And, rich or poor, we can all consider ourselves richly blessed. We have the Gospel. Many of us are usually in good health. Most of us have cherished family members and/or friends. We all have priceless blessings that money cannot buy. In that sense, then, we are as rich as kings, if not richer. Yet, we are all peasants compared to God. Whatever we have, God has more and better, and that includes both material and immaterial things. We could have all the blessings in the world, and yet, we should be humble, because no matter how great and blessed we are, we are nothing compared to God. We may be kings, yet we would still be peasants.

Second, even if we are the least blessed of mortals, we are still, eternally, kings. As I've noted, most of us aren't terribly wealthy. We may not have as many blessings (material or immaterial) as other people have. We might actually be rather poor, both physically and spiritually. Yet, we all have a royal heritage. We all have at least the potential to become kings and queens. Because of our eternal potential, we can all rise above the heights of even the greatest of mortals, no matter how humble our origins are. We may be peasants, yet we are still kings.

Though it seems like an oxymoron, we are all "peasant kings" and "peasant queens." We are all base in some ways and royal in others. There is no contradiction here. With the second comma, "Come, peasant, king, to own Him" applies to everyone. Without the second comma, the invitation still applies to us all.

Kinship to a King

This month, in Primary, we're learning about how Jesus Christ is the Son of God, but I know a few other people who are also children of God. Actually, everyone I know, everyone who has ever or will ever be born (and several more people who haven't been born and who never will be) are all children of God. This means that God truly is our Heavenly Father and that Jesus isn't just our Savior; He's our brother. I find it comforting to know that we have such a close, familial relationship with God and Jesus. It reminds me of how much He loves us and how we can become like Him. Most of all, it reminds me of who we are and that we can always turn to Him for help. He is our God, but He is also our Father. He loves us, He is close to us, and we can always be close to Him.

The Price of a Promise

I go to extraordinary lengths to keep promises. Case in point, I'm still awake right now, even though I'm dead tired and feel a little sick. I wanted to go to bed half an hour ago, but I couldn't. I still needed to blog. But I couldn't think of anything to blog about (on account of being tired and possibly sick), so I stayed up for another hour and a half, trying and failing to think of anything I could blog about.

I wonder if that's healthy, spiritually. On one hand, keeping promises is important, especially when they're spiritual promises. On the other hand, the spirit and the body are linked; what's good for one is usually good for the other, and vice versa. Theoretically, then, keeping promises should be good for the body, but since staying up too late is bad for the body, it's probably bad for the spirit, too. I should rethink my blogging and sleeping habits, if I ever find time to do that, but first, I need to convince myself that this is an adequate blog post so I can finally go to bed.

How To Get Your Wish

Over the last few days, I've heard a good deal of talk about wishes and dreams. The idea seemed to be that if you wished and dreamed for something hard enough, your wish or dream will come true. But, wishing and dreaming are not usually enough. To make something happen, one has to do more than just hope for it. There is often a lot of planning and work required. Even when we pray for something that God is willing to give us, He often requires us to put in at least a small portion of the work required for us to get it. I know that we can get the things we wish, dream, and hope for, but it's unrealistic to believe that wishing and dreaming will be enough. They are essential, but most of the time, so is work.

Memory Problem

One thing I've noticed over the last few days is that it's a lot harder to focus on spiritual matters when things are going well than it is when things are going poorly.

When things are going poorly, one is often inclined to reach out for help, and they usually have an easier time acknowledging and trying to stay on the good side of the source of that help. Basically, when we're experiencing trials, we have a regular and/or frequent reminder to turn to God. But when we aren't experiencing trials, we don't have that reminder. It's easy for us to forget God at those times because we don't seem to really need Him.

Of course, blessings can prompt feelings of gratitude, and if we have a close enough relationship with God, we might stay by Him just because we enjoy His company, even if we don't really need His help, but God's help is usually a big part of the reason people turn to Him, and when we don't seem to need His help at the moment, it's easy to forget to keep doing so.

I'm looking forward to another relatively easy day tomorrow, but this time, I'm going to try to keep a prayer in my heart, even if I don't really have a lot to say. I don't need to need God to have good reasons to pray to Him. I just hope that, tomorrow at least, I won't need to need God to help me remember to pray to Him.

Accepting Individuals

I'm currently following a video series about Mary Shelly's novel Frankenstein, and it's teaching me some important lessons. One of those lessons is acceptance.

The "monster" in Frankenstein isn't actually a monster. Sure, he looks like a monster, and he does some monstrous things by the end of the book, but that's not because he's a monstrous person bent on doing evil. Rather, he is a good person who tried to do good things, but who got rejected. The monster was lashing out in frustration at not being accepted by society.

I wonder if any modern political individuals (who are, incidentally, often dubbed monsters by their political opponents) might have similar motivations. Humans are social animals. To a certain extent, each of us wants to fit in. When one person is judged as being too different from the others, when one is deemed unacceptable, that person is likely to become upset and may even lash out against those by whom they had wanted to be accepted. This might explain some of the riots and protests we've had over the last few years.

Now, I'm not saying that we should accept anything and everything. There are some practices and ideologies that we should refuse to accept. But I don't think that there are any people we should refuse to accept. Ostracising individuals is generally counterproductive and harmful, both to the individual and to society. Making people feel like outsiders can contribute to behavior that we would rather prevent.

Another disclaimer I should make is that accepting individuals doesn't mean that we accept everything about them. We might welcome a smoker into our homes, for example, but still ask that they not smoke in the house. It is difficult, but I believe it is possible to be welcoming to an individual while making it clear that some behaviors are unacceptable. Frankenstein's monster wasn't bad just for existing, but some of his actions were. When we identify unacceptable behaviors, we should be clear that it's the behavior that's unacceptable, not the individual. Individuals can change their behavior, if we give them opportunities and reasons to.

Too often, I hear political talk that sorts people into groups based on their race, their political beliefs, their religious beliefs, and even their sexual preferences, and then declares that some of those people are good or bad, based solely on which groups they belong to. I argue that this needs to stop. We need to stop categorizing and ostracising people and instead accept them as individuals before addressing any points of contention. A wise man once said "Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved." I think that's good advice, even when the problem we have is with the person we should love.

I think that if Frankenstein's monster had been loved, he wouldn't have been or become a monster. I wonder how many other "monsters" would stop being monsters if we stopped treating them like monsters.

Life is a Thrill Ride

I think I finally understand, to some extent, why we were excited to have an opportunity to experience mortal life. Up until now, I had thought that we would be nervous and worried about it. We didn't know exactly what we were getting ourselves into. We knew it would be dangerous and, by our previous standards, at least mildly unpleasant. And yet, I've heard that, when we heard this plan, we shouted for joy. I think that I am now beginning to understand why.

Life is like a thrill ride. It's frightening, especially when we're experiencing it, but it's a great experience. By the time it's over, we may find that it doesn't seem as long or as scary as it felt while it was happening. In fact, we may find that it was an exciting and fulfilling experience. It may not be the sort of experience we enjoy while we're having it, but I think it's the sort of experience we'll be glad we had once it's over, if not earlier, and I think that we were looking forward to that.

I didn't think I would enjoy thrill rides, and I'm not sure I enjoyed them much while I was on them, but after I got off, I was glad I had gotten on, and I'm looking forward to the thrill rides I'm going to go on tomorrow. Life is a wild ride, and it sometimes gets a little rough, but it's a ride that I think we knew, even back then, would be worth riding.

A Life Worth Reliving

One of the questions for my Philosophy exam basically boils down to "Are you okay with the life you've lived? If you had to live it again, exactly as before, making absolutely no changes at all, would you be okay with that?" I was surprised to realise that my answer to that question is "Yes, I would be okay with that." Given some of the mistakes I've made and the effort I've gone through to change my habits, I was surprised to realise that I'd be okay with reliving my past mistakes. But my life is so much more than my mistakes. I've had good moments, too, including moments when I've done the right thing, even when it was difficult and moments when I've received miraculous blessings. I have a lot that I would like to change, but I also have a lot to be thankful for. Taking my life as a whole, it's been a pretty good life. So, even if I can't change anything, and I have to relive my life, complete with my mistakes and rough spots, I don't think I would mind it.

I know that you don't have to answer the question for your Philosophy class (because you're probably not taking one), and there's a fair chance that your life hasn't been quite as good as mine, but I'd encourage you to think about the question anyway. If you had to relive your life, how would you feel about that? Have you lived your life in such a way that you'd be okay with living it again? If not, what would you like to change?

Because the good news is that we can change our lives, or at least some parts of them. If we don't like our habits, for example, we can take the steps we need to change them. Especially with God's help, we can make our lives lives we'd like to live again.

Of course, the question is moot anyway. None of us are actually going to relive our lives. But the way we live our lives now will have a great impact on the lives we live hereafter. And those lives, we actually will keep living for eternity. Let us evaluate our lives and try to ensure that the lives we are living and will live are lives that are worth living and reliving.

Necessary Evil

I'm beginning to think that Brigham Young was right when he said that "Every trial and experience you have passed through is necessary for your salvation" (assuming he actually said it at all; I didn't fact check it).

My reasons for believing so have to do with the Evidential Problem of Evil, which I almost blogged about before. In my post, "The 'Problem' of Evil," the "problem" I was referring to was the Logical Problem of Evil, to be a bit more specific. The Evidential Problem of Evil is a bit different, though it uses many of the same premises. The supposed problem is that, while God might allow some small amount of necessary evil, there is far more evil in the world than a good God would allow. Considering this argument, there seem to be only a few possible conclusions one could logically draw from it. Some people conclude that either there is no God or that God doesn't care about people. Another explanation is to concede the point that Brigham Young is quoted to have made: That all of this suffering is, in fact, necessary.

I understand that this is a difficult pill to swallow. Considering all of the pain and suffering in the world, from stubbed toes to mass murder, there seems to be an excessive amount of pain and suffering on this planet. But just because it seems excessive to us doesn't mean that it actually is. God has a greater perspective than we have, and He has purposes far more grand than anything we can imagine. Maybe all this suffering was built into the systems that had to exist in order to make eternal progression possible. Maybe it is all necessary to making this the best possible world to suit God's purposes. Maybe all the suffering that seems so pointless isn't actually pointless at all.

I understand that I have very little evidence to back up this argument, if any. Therefore, I understand that this argument has little, if any, merit. I'm not trying to convince anyone that all of the evil in the world is necessary. For my purposes, it will suffice to prove that it could be necessary. It's a possibility. God knows more than we do. He has considered more options than we can even conceive. If He says, through one of His appointed mouthpieces, that all of this suffering really is necessary, I am willing to believe that there is a possibility that He's right.

I am looking forward to finding out why God believes all of this suffering is necessary. I still have some doubts on the subject, personally. Yet, I cannot refute the logic behind the Evidential Problem of Evil. This leaves me with very few logical options, but I believe that believing that all of the evil in the world actually is necessary is one of those logically valid options. We may not yet understand why it's all necessary, but that doesn't mean that it isn't.

Faith First

According to the fourth Article of Faith, faith, specifically faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ, is the first principle of the gospel. Every other part of the gospel follows it, and with good reason. Without faith, the rest of the gospel is basically meaningless. If we don't have faith in Jesus Christ, the power of His Atonement, and the importance of His commandments, our repentance and baptism won't have the same meaning or effect. If we don't have faith in the Holy Ghost, having the gift of the Holy Ghost won't help us much, since we will constantly be doubting the impressions we receive. We need to have faith in order to gain the benefits of the rest of the gospel, which is why it makes sense for faith to be described as the first principle of the gospel in the fourth Article of Faith.

An Excuse for Family Time

I just spent the day hanging out with family, making graham cracker houses with them, and playing games with them. It was great. I'm grateful (or should I say "thankful") that the holidays give us an excuse to do this kind of thing every so often. We all know that we should take time to be with our families, but life gets in the way, so when society gives us an excuse for us to take time off from work and spend that time with family instead, we should take that opportunity and try to make the most of it. I'm glad we did.

The Faith to be Fearless

About two hours ago, I had no idea where I was, except that I knew that I was dozens of miles away from home. Yet, I wasn't worried. I was following a GPS, and I knew that it would get me home. At least, I had faith that it would, and that faith kept me from being afraid about my uncertain whereabouts.

I wonder if the early pioneers felt something similar. I'm sure that there were times when they weren't sure where they were or where they were going. Certainly, they had reasons to be afraid. But they also had reasons to have faith and to trust that God would lead them through their dangers into a land that He had prepared for them. Of course, many of them died along the way, but that just meant that they got to their "promised land" before the others did. I believe that many of the saints were confident that, whether they made it to the Salt Lake Valley or were called back to heaven first, God knew where they were and He was leading them where they needed to be.

We each have opportunities to exercise that kind of faith. Eternally speaking, none of us know for certain where we really are. The veil of forgetfulness has caused us to forget our place on the Plan of Salvation, our moral standing with God can be a bit fuzzy, and, without revelation, no one can predict what God has planned for them next. We have no idea where we are or where we are headed, except that we know that we are very far from home, and that God is leading us back there.

We may have to go through great -- perhaps even fatal -- difficulties, but as long as we keep following God, we can be confident that He is leading us on the best possible route to where we most need to be. We don't have to be worried about where we are or how we'll get home from here, or even what sorts of obstacles we'll have to face to get there. God has a plan. All we have to do is have the faith to follow it.

Focus on Faith

My next Primary lesson is about the pioneers travelling to the Salt Lake Valley. However, I won't be talking about all of them. The pioneers travelled there in several groups. I talked about the first group last Sunday. This Sunday, I'll talk about the pioneers who use ox-drawn covered wagons, leaving the lesson on the handcart pioneers to my teaching companion. Considering how much time we're spending on the pioneers, it will be difficult not to grow repetitive. Thankfully, I've discovered a solution. Rather than covering the breadth of the subject, relating the various trials, challenges, and miracles the pioneers experienced, I'll focus on one element: their faith.

The specific lesson I am to teach shares several stories of pioneers who showed their faith by following (or ignoring) the counsel of their church leaders and facing dangerous odds in order to reach the Salt Lake Valley. Some of them expressed faith by requesting unorthodox miracles and following the spirit. While perhaps not all of the examples set forth by the pioneers are worth following, I will encourage my primary kids to exercise the same faith that they had. They were confident that they were headed toward a better place, and whether that "better place" was the Salt Lake Valley or the spirit world, they all made it. The determination and endurance of the saints is next week's lesson; my lesson will focus on the faith the saints must have had in order to make the journey in the first place.

The Sins of Another

One thing I don't understand about the Atonement is summed up fairly clearly in Alma 34:11.

Now there is not any man that can sacrifice his own blood which will atone for the sins of another. Now, if a man murdereth, behold will our law, which is just, take the life of his brother? I say unto you, Nay.

Yet, God's law, which is more just than any earthly law, takes the blood of our spiritual brother, Jesus Christ, to atone for our sins. How could that possibly work? Amulek goes on to say that this is possible because the Savior's sacrifice was an infinite and eternal sacrifice, but I still don't get it. Even an infinite sacrifice from one person wouldn't satisfy the demands of justice from another. If I commit a crime, I have to serve the sentence, no matter who else is willing to do it for me.

Yet, we know that the Atonement works somehow, and thank God that it does! I may not be able to wrap my head around it, but I know that the Atonement is a vital, redeeming force in everyone's lives, especially mine. I have been richly blessed by the miraculous, vicarious power of the Atonement. I don't know how it works, but I know that it does. I suppose I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. I don't need to be smart enough to understand how the Atonement satisfies the demands of justice. I just need to be wise enough to use it.

The Other Glitter Paintings

Good news. I did a little bit of research and discovered that Jamie Vasta, the creator of Deposizione, 1602, the "glitter painting" I mentioned the other day, also adapted several other works by Carvaggio, the painter of the original, more sober Deposizione or The Entombment of Christ. She adapted both religious and secular paintings, giving them all a more modern, more casual look, and they were all done in glitter.

So it seems clear that she wasn't singling out The Entombment of Christ in order to mock it with a dressed-down, glittery rendition, and I would guess that her goal wasn't mockery anyway. She gave many of Caravaggio's paintings the same treatment, and it seemed to me that she was doing it to pay homage to the original artist while putting her own, fun spin on each piece.

Of course, I would rather that she hadn't done that with such a religious and somber subject, but I can't really fault her from having fun with her art, especially since it now seems clear that she wasn't going out of her way to try to be sacrilegious.

To me, this goes to show that one shouldn't judge another person or their actions too quickly. It can be difficult to know what a person's motives are, so it's hard to be sure why they do what they do. It would have been easy for me to assume that Jamie was making light of a sacred subject, but in light of recent evidence, I'm not so sure she was.

Gaining Strength Through Service

In Sacrament meeting today, the first speaker spoke about service. He said that, in the church, we gain many opportunities to serve each other and others outside of our wards. We get so many service opportunities, in fact, that we often feel spread thin, and we think that it is important to our physical and spiritual welfare that we pass up on some of those service opportunities and we spend that time on ourselves instead. After all, you can't pour water out of an empty jug. There comes a time when you have to stop pouring and refill the jug.

Yet, the speaker's talk wasn't about the wisdom of avoiding service opportunities but the strengthening effects of taking them. The previous analogy, with us being us being represented by jugs of water, doesn't actually hold water itself. It may seem like we only have finite resources, and that may be true, but we have a potential for an infinite capacity to carry and use those resources. We are composed of sets of muscles. the more you use muscles, the stronger they get, and the easier it gets to use those muscles without tiring out. If a person who has never exercised tries to jog a mile, they'll burn themselves out fairly quickly, but if that same person keeps exercising, eventually that mile-long jog will be a piece of cake to them.

Of course, we can burn ourselves out doing too much service, but the more service we do, the easier it'll become for us, and the less energy it'll take for us to do it. So maybe I shouldn't focus so much on how difficult it can be to have so many obligations, including the obligation to take on more obligations when church leaders ask me to, and instead focus on developing my service muscles so I can handle of the obligations I currently have, plus any more I gain as I move forward. Doing service can be exhausting, but, ironically, the more service we do, the less exhausting it gets.

The Glitter Painting

I'm not sure how to feel about a painting I saw today. Firstly, it wasn't technically a painting; it was made with glitter rather than paint. But that's not what has me emotionally confused. What troubles me is the subject. The "painting" is of a modern family on the beach, posing like the figures in a famous Italian painting. It looks like fun, and the people who posed for this picture probably had a lot of fun posing for that picture and spending the day at the beach. There's just one problem: The painting they're mimicking depicts the burial of Jesus Christ.

The original painting is, naturally, far more serious than the "painting" I saw today. The original painting uses serious expressions, dark tones and shades, and generally a far more reverent attitude toward the subject it was depicting. Today's painting, using glitter to show casually-dressed people represent a sacred subject as part of their fun day at the beach, showed a certain amount of disrespect for Jesus Christ.

Yet, I'm not sure they meant it that way. Perhaps, rather than mocking Jesus Himself, they were mocking the melodramatic way in which He had been painted. Or maybe they weren't trying to make such a statement at all. It could be that they were all just having fun, not thinking about what message(s) their playful pose might inadvertently send.

Then again, one should probably always assume that there's a deeper message to just about every painting or sculpture one sees. If that's the case, then what is the message here? To not take oneself too seriously? To not take art to seriously? To not take Christ seriously? This "painting" is rather casual, which is in stark contrast to the original painting, but I'm not sure what that contrast is trying to say. I don't know whether to be pleased that a group of friends had a fun day at the beach, amused that the artist made a silly version of an ultra-serious painting, or bothered that the artist and her friends seem to be mocking Christ.

This painting should be interesting to write about in my Response Paper, largely because ot the many conflicting feelings this glitter "painting" gives me.

The "Problem" of Evil

In my Philosophy class, we recently discussed something called "the Problem of Evil." Some atheists say that if God really existed, and if He really was all-knowing, all-good, and all-powerful, then He wouldn't allow evil to exist (and, for this discussion, this definition of "evil" is expanded to include both "moral evil," which includes all sinful and evil acts, and "natural evil" which includes natural disasters, disease, and death). God, being good, doesn't want people to suffer or to commit sin. Being knowledgeable, He knows that evil will occur, if He doesn't prevent it. And, being powerful, God has the power to stop evil from existing. So, why doesn't He?

I believe that God has good reasons to allow evil to continue to exist. Most evils we experience second-hand give us experience. All of the trials and sufferings we experience in life, including being the victims of others' sins, can work toward our eternal benefit. As for the evils we commit ourselves, I think that they can also give us experience and eventually work toward our benefit, if we repent of them. I also wonder if it may be a greater evil for God to force us to be righteous than it is for Him to allow us to be evil.

God has an eternal perspective, and He knows things about the laws of the universe we can't even imagine. It's possible that the reason God lets evil exists because He lacks the power to prevent it, but I doubt it. I don't think that the continued existence of evil diminishes God's attributes at all. I know that God wants what best for us, that He knows what's best for us, and that He's powerful enough to make it happen. The fact that we suffer anyway may tell us more about the value of that suffering than it tells us about the nature of God. Perhaps God allows evil to exist because that's what's best for our eternal welfare. Maybe suffering through a few short decades of evil is exactly what our spirits need to grow. I'm only guessing, but it may be that the reason God hasn't solved "the problem of evil" yet is because, in His eternal plan for our eternal welfare, the existence of evil isn't actually a problem at all.

Studying Ethics

I might have mentioned a few days ago that I'm signing up for next semester's classes pretty soon. One of the classes I'm thinking of taking is a class on ethics. I really enjoyed that section of my Intro to Philosophy class, and I think I'd like to spend a few months asking myself difficult, ethical questions and trying to determine what's the right thing to do and why it's the right thing to do.

Of course, we do something similar fairly frequently. We often have to make difficult, ethical choices, and we sometimes have to study them out in our minds to determine the best course of action. Those situations test our knowledge of ethics in much the way an ethics class would, I imagine. We are given a textbook in the form of scriptures and the words of prophets, we can study the problems out and seek confirmation from the Spirit similar to how we can seek help from a tutor, and after we make our choice, we will get feedback from out Instructor, whether that means getting a good grade or a bad one.

In this sense, everyone should study ethics. We don't necessarily need to know what ancient philosophers thought about what was right or wrong, but we should certainly try to figure out right and wrong for ourselves (with a lot of help from God, of course). It may be one of the most important subjects one can study. We each have a very good reason to study ethics and try to learn how to behave ethically: There's a lot more at stake for each of us than our GPAs. We owe it to ourselves to learn how to make good ethical decisions, and I'm looking forward to spending a few months next year exploring what that means.

Bridging the Gap

This Sunday, I'm going to give my Primary class the first lesson they'll have had in about a month. We skipped two weeks to practice for our Primary presentation and one to actually perform it. Now, instead of picking up right where we left off, the plan (at least on paper) is to jump ahead to the lesson we'd have been on had we not skipped those three weeks. This means that we'd jump from their last lesson about Joseph and Hyrum Smith's martyrdom to a lesson about the saints settling in Salt Lake. A lot happens between those two lessons, and I'd like to at least touch on most of it to help the children get caught up to where the lesson schedule says we should be now.

First, I'll want to talk about succession. I might mention that Sidney Rigdon, who had been the Joseph Smith's First Counsellor, thought that he should be the next president of the church, but that the Quorum of the Twelve lead the church instead for the next three and a half years until Brigham Young was set apart as the President of the Church, he having been the President of the Quorum of the Twelve. Whether or not I mention Ridgon, I'll certainly teach that the leadership of the church falls to the Quorum of the Twelve and then to the President of the Quorum of the Twelve after a Prophet's death.

The lesson that teaches about Brigham Young's succession of Joseph Smith concludes by talking about the saints preparing to move West. Enemies of the church had killed Joseph Smith in hopes that the church would simply fall apart without him. When the discovered that the church wasn't falling apart and that a successor had been chosen, they attacked again, hoping to destroy the church by force. Instead, the Saints left Nauvoo and headed for the Rocky Mountains. The next lesson after Brigham Young's succession focusses on Winter Quarters. I might skip that one in the interest of time because I'm not sure how important Winter Quarters really was.

Of course, I will have to talk about the travels and troubles of the Saints, whether that includes a lengthy description of Winter Quarters or not. The bottom line is that the journey was very difficult. As long as I can drive that point home (preferably without spending too much time on it), I should be alright. The lesson after Winter Quarters, being about the pioneers crossing the plains, should have more than enough information to help it hold up its section of the narrative.

And finally, I will have to teach at least parts of the lesson I'm supposed to teach this week, which is about the Saints settling the Salt Lake Valley. This starts an era of unprecedented stability for the Saints. With a clear line of succession established and a permanent headquarters, the Saints' future seemed far less uncertain than it had only a few years before. This basically establishes the order and headquarters of the church from then until the present.

The last several lessons of the year, including the three or four lessons I'll cover this Sunday, will be the "falling action" and the "epilogue" of the story we've spent all year telling, with the martyrdom of Joseph Smith having been the climax. These lessons will help make the transition from the days of early church history to today. The death of Joseph Smith marked the end of an era for the church, and the settling of the Salt Lake Valley could be said to mark the beginning of the current era. My lesson this Sunday will bridge the gap between them.

Public Piety

Earlier today, I stopped by Wendy's on my way to a meeting. While I was there, a woman approached me, said that she had seen me praying over my food, and offered me a pamphlet produced by her church. That encounter resonated with me, and I found myself being glad that I had prayed in public, and I was glad that she had publicly practised her religion as well.

I believe that praying and performing other religious acts in public is a very good idea. Of course, it's a good idea to do religious things in public because it's a good idea to do them at all, but it's especially good to do them in public because that allows other people to see you being religious, which can encourage them to be more religious as well. I think that there is not quite enough religion in the world today. Perhaps we ought to make a habit of practising our religion in public to remind others that it is still normal and acceptable to be religious, even in public.

Of course, we don't want to be obnoxious about it, and we certainly don't want to feign religiousness just to make a show if it. We shouldn't be hypocritical; our religious expressions must be genuine. But part of that genuine religious expression is being exactly as religious in public as we are in private. If we pray over our food in private, we should also do so in public. Studying the scriptures in public might be awkward, but might be worth doing, if it's convenient enough, and there are other ways to show piety in public as well. We can sing hymns, we can maintain our standards, and we can share our beliefs when they come up in conversation. We don't want to overdo it and be see as some kind of "religious nut." The goal is to be honest about who we are and how we act, and the hope is that other people will grow to see our religious actions as normal.

Beyond merely being a good idea, I think that it's important to be religious in public. There are many people who are willing to be non-religious and even anti-religious in public. We could use some religious examples in the public square as well. So, don't hide your piety like someone putting their candle under a basket. Instead, be the light on the hill, so that others may see your light and hopefully be drawn toward it.

Deadlines Before Departure

Today, I kept finding out about important deadlines that I have coming up just before or just after my trip. I knew I had to get my Philosophy exam rescheduled before I leave, but I also learned that I have a paper due the Monday after I get back, so I'll have to write that before I go, which means that I've got an errand I should run as soon as possible, and in case having to write an essay and take an exam in the same week wasn't already stressful enough, I was also reminded that my "priority registration appointment" to sign up for next semester's classes come up on the morning I leave for my trip. Maybe I'm a weakling who's not good at juggling due dates or managing time, but it feels like life is coming at me pretty fast right now.

The good news is that I don't have to tackle any of these tasks alone. I can get God's help with planning and dealing with all of these things. He can help me remember everything I should consider and deal with. I'm thankful that, no matter what life throws at us, we don't have to face it alone.

The Sheaves and the Storm

In Alma 26, Ammon talks about missionary work using an analogy that has since become quite common: farming. Yet, Ammon takes this analogy a step or two farther than we normally do. We talk about sowing and reaping and harvesting, and so did he (minus the sowing), but he goes on to say that the "sheaves" that have been "harvested" will now be protected from the storm to come.

Yea, they shall not be beaten down by the storm at the last day; yea, neither shall they be harrowed up by the whirlwinds; but when the storm cometh they shall be gathered together in their place, that the storm cannot penetrate to them; yea, neither shall they be driven with fierce winds whithersoever the enemy listeth to carry them.
Alma 26:6

What interested me as I read this verse is how the "sheaves" would be protected from the "storm." The sheaves represent the converts and other members of the church, and the storm probably represents the world and the evils thereof, but what could it mean that the sheaves would be "gathered together in their place, that the storm cannot penetrate to them"? "Their place" could be the church itself, with its temples and meetinghouses and meetings, but how would being in those prevent the storm from penetrating to us?

It could be that this protection refers to keeping the commandments. God's commandments are often intended to help us avoid some of the pitfalls of mortality. For example, when we keep the commandment not to lie, we avoid the pitfall of getting caught in a lie. When we keep the commandment not to steal, we can avoid the pitfall of getting arrested for stealing. And there's a whole host of pitfalls we can avoid by keeping the commandment to be chaste. When we keep the commandments that help us avoid problems, those problems won't be able to touch us.

Then, what about the other part? "Neither shall they be driven with fierce winds whithersoever the enemy listeth to carry them." This could be another reference to being righteous, and thus not being "driven" to hell by the "fierce winds" of "the enemy," but I think this could mean something else. Elsewhere in the scriptures, "wind of doctrine" is an analogy used to refer to false teachings. Perhaps following the Lord's revealed, restored gospel will help us avoid being "blown around" by the ever-shifting winds of worldly values and teachings. Whether it means more protection from the penalties of sin or protection from being deceived and misled by "wind of doctrine," being protected from the "fierce winds" sounds like a very good thing.

I don't know what all "the storm at the last day" will entail, and I don't know all the ways in which the Gospel of Jesus Christ will protect us from it, but I do know that, if we follow God, He will help us avoid ultimate misery and achieve eternal happiness. We will still have to face the storm to some extent, and we may even take some storm-related damage, even if we do everything right, but if we faithfully follow the Gospel of Jesus Christ and "gather... together in [our] place," we will escape the worst of the storm.

Turn to God Sooner Rather Than Later

I often find myself sitting by my computer late at night, wondering what to blog about. Sometimes, like yesterday, I already have an idea, and I'm able to blog quickly, but other times, like tonight, I end up racking my brain for any blogworthy thought I can find. In these moments of desperation, I often turn to God for inspiration, and the answer that I got from Him tonight is that I should have turned to Him sooner.

I'm sure that several blogworthy things happened today. I had many conversations and experiences, any one of which could have inspired a blog post; I just wasn't in the right frame of mind to pick up on the inspiration God had tried to give me earlier.

Tomorrow morning, as part of my daily personal prayer, I'm going to ask God for the wisdom to see the inspiration He puts in front of me. I know it's there. God is always trying to teach us. I just need the wisdom to see it.

But tomorrow morning is too late for today, so the message that I want to leave with you today is that we shouldn't wait until the last minute to ask for God's help. We shouldn't wait for things to go wrong before we turn to Him, especially because, if we turn to Him early enough and follow His directions, fewer things will go wrong.

I missed several opportunities to be inspired today because I turned to God for inspiration too late. I won't make that mistake tomorrow, and I hope you won't either.

Diligence of Mind

As I read the Book of Mormon this morning, I came across Mosiah 7:33, in which King Limhi tells his people how they can secure the Lord's help in escaping the Lamanites, which is also how we can secure the Lord's help in escaping sin.

But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage.

There are many phrases here that I could single out. "Full purpose of heart," "Put your trust in Him," and "According to His own will and pleasure" are all blogworthy. But for the purpose of this blog post, I want to focus on the phrase that stood out to me this morning: "Diligence of mind."

On my mission, I learned that diligence is sometimes defined as "steady, consistent, earnest, and energetic effort in doing the Lord’s work" (Preach My Gospel, Chapter 6). Applying that to the mind, we see that we need to steadily, consistently, earnestly, and energetically focus our thoughts on the gospel. This includes brief periods of intense scripture study and regular study over the course of one's life. It includes deep pondering of the gospel and frequent consideration of spiritual thoughts. It includes devout repulsion of evil thoughts and constant vigilance against their return. In almost all of these areas, I have significant room for improvement.

I have a long way to go before I can say that I "serve [God] with all diligence of mind," but at least I know now what that means and have an idea of how I can achieve it. I hope that I can diligently strive to be more diligent in focussing my thoughts on the gospel.

A Trustworthy Stranger

I did it again. I did, for the second time, an abysmally foolish thing that I have known, since childhood, that a person should never do. I even blogged about it when I did it the first time, and in that blog post, I wrote, in all caps, that a person should never do what I had done. And tonight, I did it again. I got into a car with a stranger.

The difference is that, this time, he wasn't really a stranger. True, I didn't recognise him, and I probably won't recognise him later when I see him again. At the time I accepted a ride from him, I didn't know his name. But I still sort of knew him. At least, I knew enough about him that I knew that I could trust him.

He was a friend of a friend, or rather, a friend of a handful of people whom I knew to be intelligent people with whom I could trust my life. If they trusted him, I knew I could trust him, even though I knew very little else about him.

This has gotten me to think about trust and how it can be extended, particularly as it applies to the Gospel. I trust God. I trust God's judgement. I am confident that I can trust those whom He trusts.

Admittedly, there are occasions when His trust is betrayed, and, given how He could have seen that coming, I'm going to have to figure out why he would still put the soon-to-be betrayer in a position of trust, knowing that that trust would be betrayed.

But even when His trust seems to have been misplaced, I know that I can trust Him and His eternal plan for our well-being and happiness. Maybe there's a good reason He lets that happen, just like there's a good reason He lets bad things happen to good people. There was an exceptionally good reason Jesus let Judas betray Him, so I don't count Judas' betrayal act as a bad mark against my trust in Jesus' judgement. I put a similar quality of faith in God, who sometimes allows trust to be placed in the hands of those who would betray that trust.

Thankfully, such betrayals are rare. In fact, they're rare enough that I would say that anyone whom God trusts is probably far more trustworthy than a random person off the street, just as my friends' friends are more trustworthy than a random stranger, even if I don't know my friends' friends myself.

I trust my friends' judgement, just as I trust God's, and I trust them enough that I am willing to trust those whom they are willing to trust, even if I know nothing else about my trusted friends' trusted friends.

The Wisdom of Foolishness

My family is trying to get rid of a TV, so we put it in front of our driveway with a "FREE" sign on it. There have been no takers yet, nor are there now likely to be. This afternoon, walking home from the bus stop, I saw the TV and the clouds overhead, and I thought "We should probably move the TV in case it rains tonight," but I didn't say anything like that to my family. I suppose I was afraid of sounding silly. After all, why should we care if the TV gets rained on? We don't want it anymore anyway. And, for all I know, TVs are okay with getting wet as long as they dry out before you plug them in. If the others didn't think it was a big enough of an issue to be worth bringing up, I wasn't going to bring it up, either. But, sure enough, it started to rain, and I still had the impression that maybe we didn't want the TV to get too wet, for whatever reason. So, there I was a few minutes ago, out on my driveway in the rain at 11 o'clock at night, awkwardly carrying the TV onto the shelter of the porch, all because I had been too embarrassed to ask for help in moving it earlier, before it started to rain.

Spiritual promptings don't always sound like spiritual promptings, and people sometimes do stupid things (or stupidly fail to do smart things) because they're afraid of looking stupid. The moral of the story, as far as I'm concerned, is that I need to get over my fear of appearing foolish for acting on what feels like a whim, because all too often, I fail to do something I was thinking about doing, and I later find out that it was important for me to do it. I'd like to stop making that mistake. I'd like to follow spiritual promptings more often, including the ones I don't recognize as spiritual promptings. And if that means acting impulsively sometimes and doing things just because I feel like I should do them, even if I don't know why, I hope I have the courage to say "so be it," and move the TV onto the porch before it starts to rain.

How Studying the Book of Mormon Can Help You Do Better In School (Or Anywhere Else)

I have recently recommitted to reading the Book of Mormon each day. There are many reasons for doing this, and one of those reasons is for the sake of my grades. So far, I'm doing well this semester, but Humanities gave me a little bit of trouble earlier, and Philosophy is getting more complex, so I wouldn't mind the extra help that President Russell M. Nelson suggested might come. In his recent General Conference talk, President Nelson said:

Immersing ourselves regularly in the truths of the Book of Mormon can be a life-changing experience. One of our missionary granddaughters, Sister Olivia Nelson, promised an investigator that if he would read the Book of Mormon daily, his test scores on his university exams would improve. He did, and they did.

Theoretically, studying the Book of Mormon daily could help me with my grades as well.

This help comes in a roundabout way. Studying the Book of Mormon won't help my grades directly, but it can help me get the Spirit, and the Spirit can help direct my thoughts and my studies and help me remember things during test time. Of course, I still have to commit time to studying for my classes as well as studying the Book of Mormon, but the results may well be worth it. If spending five minutes each day with the Book of Mormon can help me maintain my GPA, I'll take it.

Naturally, this help that the Spirit provides doesn't only apply toward getting better grades. The Spirit can help us with any number of things. Any task that involves memory, intelligence, creativity, or luck can be met more easily with the aid of the Spirit. And, arguably, every task involves at least some element of luck. So, if you do anything and feel like you could use some help doing it a bit better, you might consider enlisting the Spirit's help by reading the Book of Mormon daily or doing any number of Sunday School Answers, like praying and giving service. No matter what the task at hand is, having the Spirit with you can help you do it better.

More Hardship, but More Help

There's something that I feel is important to know about the Gospel, and President Uchtdorf said it rather well in his Saturday Morning talk: "following the Savior will not remove all of your trials. However, it will remove the barriers between you and the help your Heavenly Father wants to give you."

As we walk the path of discipleship, we find that it is more difficult than following the crowd. We restrain ourselves against easier courses of action and we do so against the opposition of the general public. However, we are blessed for doing so, and the blessings we gain can help us face the hardships we take on as disciples of Christ. Taking the worldly path seems easier until we realize that we have to face the trials of life without God's help, and taking on the additional difficulties that come with being a disciple seems terribly foolish until we discover that God's help more than makes up for the increased difficulty.

Sometimes, I wish life was easier, and I sometimes think that life would be easier for me if I gave up on trying to be righteous, but that's a fool's trap. Following the world seems easier, but it's actually easier to walk with God. God helps those who struggle to follow Him. The world isn't quite as kind. As we choose to follow God rather than the world, we can expect to face additional difficulties others don't have to face, but at least we won't have to face them alone. Following the disciple's path means facing additional hardship, but thankfully, it also means gaining access to additional help.

Mutual Contribution

As I reviewed Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson's talk, The Needs Before Us, I was reminded of something I wish I had blogged about this morning. During her talk, Sister Oscarson said that we can serve others and help meet other's needs by contributing at church meetings. We sometimes go to church hoping to hear a good lesson and be spiritually refreshed. I know I do. But we also go there to support each other, and we should try to remember that. Sister Oscarson quoted Elder D. Todd Christofferson as having said, "A major reason the Lord has a church is to create a community of Saints that will sustain one another in the ‘strait and narrow path which leads to eternal life.’" Of course, we hope that the lessons we hear at church and the spirit we feel there will help sustain us, but we also go there so we can help sustain others.

Fortunately, though this advice comes too late to apply to this Sunday, it can also apply to virtually any other experience we may find ourselves in. I am a college student, and I sometimes go to class expecting to just sit back and let the instructor teach me something, but I can do more than that. I can enhance the learning environment by asking important questions and making insightful comments. I can contribute to the lesson rather than just listening to it. We can do similar things in other situations. We can reach out and offer help others, no matter where or under what circumstances we meet them.

Unfortunately, doing this will sometimes be difficult. It will force us to step out of our comfort zones. It will also often require us to be conscious of other's needs. Noticing and the responding to the needs of others can be a challenging test of observance and empathy, but the good news is that meeting others' needs can help us meet our needs as well. God blesses those who do service for His children, so as we become blessings in the lives of others, we receive blessings, too.

We are in this church, and on this Earth, to both serve and to be served. We all need blessings, and there is no sin or shame in seeking them, but one of the ways to secure the blessings we need is by meeting others' needs first. If we come to church, or to life, just looking for what we can get out of it, I think that we are missing the point. I think that we should also look for ways to contribute to the lives of others, both inside and outside of the church, even as they contribute to ours.

An Invisible Lack of Messes

I got a decent amount of work done today. I sorted several piles of junk I had left lying around the house, I tidied up the top of my dresser, I cleaned out our birds' cages, folded some blankets, and swept downstairs. All told, I accomplished multiple hours of good, solid work.

Yet, much of the work I did today is invisible. If you look at the downstairs floor, for example, you wouldn't think "Ah, this floor has been recently swept." You wouldn't notice that piles of junk are no longer there or that the blankets are neatly folded. Rather, it would be far more noticeable if the work hadn't been done. One would notice dust bunnies, crumpled blankets, and piles of junk. Often, problems are far more noticeable than a lack thereof.

When we work, we sometimes look back on a day and think that we didn't accomplish much. If I looked back at the areas in which I worked, I would still see some clutter that needs to be sorted out, and I would still see some dust bunnies that had evaded my broom. The problems that remain are much easier to spot than the problems that have already been solved.

So let's try to be aware of our circumstances and patient with ourselves. We may be accomplishing far more than we realize, and we may have fewer problems than we think. Of course, everyone's lives will always have problems, and there will always be more work to be done, but it can be refreshing to appreciate how much work we have already done, even if we can't see it, and we should appreciate not having the problems we don't notice we don't have.

"Live With Honor; Die With Glory"

Another blog post inspired by a video-game-related Youtube video. Overwatch is another game that I don't play, but still follow for the animated ads, and tonight, it reminded me why. The creators of Overwatch have earned the attention of millions by making a top-quality game with an extensive and diverse cast of playable heroes and by advertising it with an ongoing series of incredible animated shorts. Their latest addition to this series is "Honor and Glory." It stars Reinhardt, a crusader whose motto is "Live with honor; die with glory." However, it could be argued that his personal motto was "Live for glory," but either way, his motto means something very different for me than for him.

Though it may sound strange out of context, especially to anyone who knows me, I am striving for glory. The difference is that the glory I seek is eternal, while the glory Reinhardt fought for was worldly. And Reinhardt sought glory by fighting, while I seek glory by trying to be righteous. Eventually, Reinhardt came around, and by the end of the video, Reinhardt was living up to the first half of his true motto, as we all must.

In order to achieve Celestial glory when we die, we must first live with honor. Righteousness is a prerequisite for receiving any blessing from God, especially including the greatest blessing He can give us: His glory. Thus, living for glory doesn't mean seeking the praise of the world, but seeking the blessings of God, and we don't do it by trying to stand out or show off; we do it by trying to be good. Living with honor is difficult, and I don't plan on dying any time soon, but I will try to live with honor so that I may die with glory.

Better Late Than Never

A few days ago, I renewed my commitment to saying a personal prayer and reading the Book of Mormon for five minutes each morning. This morning, I already broke that commitment. I could make my excuses, but I'd rather make amends, so I'm going to spend the next five-ish minutes reading the Book of Mormon on my phone and then say a short prayer, asking God for forgiveness and thinking Him for His patience. It may be too late to read the Book of Mormon this morning, but I can still read it today.

Homing Instincts

In "Yearning for Home," President Dieter F. Uchtdorf spoke about the migration and homing instincts many animals possess. He listed monarch butterflies, leatherback turtles, humpback whales, and arctic terns among the creatures who have an incredible, even global, sense of direction. Oddly, in his list of creatures that have an uncanny knack for finding their way home, he didn't even mention the first such creature that comes to my mind: Homing pigeons. However, someone else did.

Some months ago (possibly even years ago, at this point - Some of my "Blog About" notes are terribly old), someone in my ward (whichever ward that was at the time) gave a talk in which he spoke of a group of homing pigeons which were somehow startled or blown off course by a sonic boom. Yet, despite this serious set back, the homing pigeons still managed to find their way home.

President Uchtdorf taught that human beings have an "inner guidance system" which helps us find our way to our heavenly home, similar to how the guidance systems in some animals help them. And, I might add, the guidance systems we have can help us make our way back no matter what may blow us off course, just like with the homing pigeons. Nothing can permanently separate us from God. No matter what mishaps or misdeeds may hinder us, our hearts will continually point us back toward God.

Of course, unlike animals, human beings find it very easy to ignore such instincts. In fact, it's harder to  follow our "inner guidance systems" than it is to fall away. But still, no matter how far we drift off course, we can always make it back by following the parts of ourselves that yearn to head back.

I am thankful that God gave us this homing instinct to help encourage us to follow the straight and narrow path. I am confident that such an instinct has made all the difference in helping me make many right decisions and helping me come a little bit closer to God. I plan to try to attune myself to this instinct and to follow it as often as I can manage to. Though this instinct is sometimes faint, I am certain that it will never completely fall silent, and that makes it one of my most reliable methods of finding my way back home.